


everything has changed

by Xylia_Neo



Category: Keeper of the Lost Cities Series - Shannon Messenger
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bad Parenting, Canon Backstory, Childhood Trauma, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Gen, Growing Up, Growing Up Together, Heavy Angst, Long Lost/Secret Relatives, Parent-Child Relationship, Post-Betrayal, Unresolved Emotional Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-31
Updated: 2017-08-30
Packaged: 2018-10-13 05:49:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 60,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10507566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xylia_Neo/pseuds/Xylia_Neo
Summary: “You’re my tw—brother, right?” Linh deliberated if she should have saidtwinor not. Maybe not. It was better to pretend they were just normal brother and sister—not that they were normal at all. But it was good to hide, like all elves always do, to create and build up the illusion that everything in their seemingly immaculate world was perfect. “…I’m Linh, what’s your name?”Her brother grinned at her, showing his pair of perfect teeth which gleamed white. He actually would have looked absolutely adorable, if not for the wary glint that was always in his eyes. "Tam. My name is Tam."





	1. a shroud of shadow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mallowmelting](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mallowmelting/gifts).



> hi guys, it's xylia! this is an au where the whole timeline of KEEPER is shifted back two years before--which means everyone is two years older than they should be when all the things happen. in this fic, tam and linh were separated from birth and they only meet each other when they are two years old, which is when this fic starts. this story will stretch on to beyond their days at exillium and beyond what's told so far in the KEEPER universe. 
> 
> \---  
> i'll be dedicating this fic to sammie, who is my one of my faves. she also wrote this amazing tam & linh fic which i obsess over. it's called swan song, and everyone should go and check it out!!!
> 
> \---  
> i've received some feedback from my friend that linh is terribly OOC in this fic, but see, that's kinda the point. this is set before she meets sophie & the gang, so there's a long span of years before that. she goes through a huge change in character after tam and her father barge into her life, and the series of events after that change also slowly, gradually turn her into who she is now. but my friend also didn't like angst,,, so,,, yeah.

"Mummy!" the little girl cried out, one hand reaching out for the shadowy silhouette of the lady, one hand clutching the little jade bracelet—the only gift she had left behind for her. "Don't go…"

The lady stilled, her jet-black hair that cascaded down her shoulders swaying from side to side as she stood there, stiff and motionless. A million emotions coursed through the veins of her body, and she relented and turned around to face her daughter.

The girl was so like her, both in terms of appearance and mind-set. Their raven-black hair that hung down to their waists, their sharp chins and high cheekbones, their pale silvery-blue eyes—whether they were glimmering because of the moon's reflection or because of the tears welling up in both of their eyes, it wasn't clear.

The daughter tugged at her mother's arm as she stared up at the lady she knew so well, yet cast in a hood of shadow. She didn't know if it had something to do with her special ability, or simply because of the dark of the night. Anyway, the girl couldn't see her mother's expression at all, but she knew she could see hers, and that made her feel especially strange and vulnerable.

"Stay. _Please."_

"Linh…" The girl felt like her mother had just pursed her lips in disapproval, like she had always did when she was disappointed in something that she had done. The sound of her sigh wafted through the air, like a restless breeze. "You know the Council wants me to go. It's a _very_ important mission—one—one that involves finding back of a…lost elf."

That was the first piece of information that actually made _some_ kind of sense. But at the same time, it didn't really make any sense at all. Why would an elf be lost somewhere in the Lost Cities? The Lost Cities…they had goblin guards patrolling along every street.

And every elf had a registry pendant with them, she reminded herself, reaching up to clutch at her own, feeling the cold crystal against her fingers. Wherever someone was, the Council just needed to check their registry pendants to locate them. So why in the world would they need her mother to go and find them?

She couldn't lose her mother. She was the only family she had. Her father was one mystery her mother wouldn't explain to her.

"Why would they be lost?" she asked…then a cold feeling hit her in the chest. She clutched the doll in her hand tighter. "By lost, do you mean in terms of their sanity?"

Her mother flinched, then shook her head. The cloak of shadows surrounded her like a real fabric, drifting along with the wind's patterns. "No…they…are really lost somewhere…And the Council can't track them down—because their registry pendants were torn off from their bodies. Thus, I need to go and find them— _now._ You'll just need to stay put here and let Aunt Cadence take good care of you. She'll be coming over in a moment. Then I'll be back, probably by tomorrow morning. It depends on how fast I can find them."

"Are they really that important? Are they really more important than _me?"_ Linh asked, her selfish side slowly slipping in again. She felt a little bitter—who were they, that her mother—who had never left her behind before—needed to leave her in someone else's care for the sake of them?

Linh's mother exhaled a shaky breath, and for a split second, the shadows masking her face slipped into nothing, revealing her traumatised face. "I—" her voice hitched and cracked. She cleared her voice. "I have been trying to find the chance to search for them for _years,_ Linh. Ever since you had been born, they have gone missing. And now my chance has come, given to me by the Council. I need to go now. Please don't hate me."

With that, she vanished into the shadows, until nothing could be seen of her, save for a faint outline of her lithe body slowly disappearing into the distance. After a while, the light of a crystal zapped across the empty plains, and she was gone, leaving Linh Song standing there in the light of the full moon. She felt hollow and empty as she stared up at the radiant, bright full moon that hung over the midnight sky. Her mother's words rung inside her head over and over again, like a broken record.

_Please don't hate me._

Only when the crow-black clouds had misted over the surface of the moon, she realised that her mother had never really answered her question whether if the lost elves really were more important than her.

* * *

Aunt Cadence was her usual stern self, strict and unapproachable. Linh kept her distance from her, and they only came together again when she called her over for a late night supper in the dining room—a simple, long room with a small round table at which Linh and her mother usually sat down to eat their meals the gnomes had cooked for them.

It was the latest meal she'd ever had. Or maybe not really. If her life was considered as one day, the last meal before she died would be her latest meal ever. But then…she probably wouldn't die—since no elf had ever died of old age yet. Maybe they really _were_ immortal.

Linh shoved the strange musings into the back of her mind, not sure what to make of her mind always thinking up with queer and peculiar thoughts that freaked her out every time. She had been getting around old ideas and thinking up with new ones ever since she was gaining knowledge about the world.

The only reason why she hadn't already ran straight to a Washer to wash away her weird thoughts was simply because her mother had always liked hearing her talk about them.

She once said that her theories and concepts could change the world someday, and that she would probably become a Councillor so that she could use these ideas and make the Lost Cities a better place.

Though Linh wasn't so sure about becoming a Councillor. It seemed sort of dull and boring when the image of the twelve regal and elegantly-dressed Councillors came to her mind. They could only sit in their stone-cold thrones every day, hold tribunals in the Tribunal Hall, sit in their palace-like offices, discuss the future of their world…

Linh liked to think what the future could be like, but she didn't like the idea of her future being controlled by twelve people who probably had no insight in her life or any understanding towards her at all.

Especially since the only person she really knew was her mother. But then, after the happenings today, she wasn't so sure if she really knew what was going on in her mother's mind anymore.

She wished she was a Telepath. She would even breach the rules of telepathy to find out what her mother was thinking, if really necessary. She hated it when things were being kept from her. But then, didn't everybody?

Linh didn't know. As she told herself again, she didn't know anybody but herself. Or…maybe she didn't even understand herself. Like how she couldn't understand how to get herself to stop thinking about everything in the world.

That was why she couldn't wait until she was eligible to be enrolled into Foxfire. Every kid in the nobility probably went there, to hone their special abilities and study interesting and eye-opening things. Aunt Cadence was a teacher there—she was both a Polyglot and a Conjurer. Having two talents sounded cool—but Linh knew it was tedious and hard to keep both of them in check.

"Linh." Speak (think) of the devil. Linh looked up immediately and stiffened when she met Aunt Cadence's midnight blue eyes, paired with her raven-black hair, the exact same colour as her and her mother's hair. But this time, she didn't look sharp, or fierce. She looked…a little pitiful. And maybe a little apologetic.

Her aunt seemed like she was expecting a response from her, so she said, "Yes, Aunt Cadence?" She tried to hide her anticipation and curiosity at what her aunt could want to talk to her about. Usually when she came over, they would spend the meal in complete silence, maybe make some stiff small talk. But this felt…different. More important.

"…Do you know exactly why your mum left? Or in this case, _where_ she went?"

Linh coiled back like she'd been stabbed with an arrow. But Aunt Cadence was watching her like a sniper ready to shoot down her enemies, so she forced herself to recover quickly. She sat up straighter in her seat, and shook her head. She didn't speak—she was sure if she spoke, her voice wouldn't be the most pleasant to ears.

She knew she would probably need to open her mouth later, so she tried in vain to clear her throat in a silent way as she watched Aunt Cadence hesitate for a while, before whispering, "She went to find your father."

_"_ _What?"_

She couldn't help herself from staring at Aunt Cadence like she'd gone mad. The fork in her hand slipped from her fingers and clattered to the floor, a deafening sound in contrast to the cold, deadly silence that had settled in. She, the little elvin girl, only two years old, who'd always had a sharp mind, didn't know what to say to this now.

A bead of cold sweat formed on her forehead as she shook her head. "How could this be possible? My father? After all these years…?" She studied Aunt Cadence's expression carefully, but it was unreadable. "You must be lying to me."

"I'm not, Linh." Aunt Cadence also set down the cutlery in her hand, but instead of throwing it on the marble floor, she simply placed it on the porcelain table. "Your mother has been hoping for a chance to find your missing family for ages already. She'd questioned the Council millions of times, but the Council had no follow-up to where they were—"

"Wait a second." Her voice sounded hoarse, raw from emotion. _"They?"_

Did that mean that there was another member of her family that she didn't know about? Did that mean her mother had been lying to her all this time that she was an only child?

Aunt Cadence confirmed her absolute fears when she nodded, casting a sad look at Linh, who felt herself going completely numb as she said, "You have a brother…a _twin_ brother."

* * *

Linh stood silently on the platform of the balcony, hands clutching the pillars of the parapet to gaze down at the plains where she had last seen her mother. Tears that had welled up in her eyes threatened to fall, but she resisted them and gazed up at the stars instead. They brought her the comfort darkness couldn't. The only kind of darkness that brought her comfort and warmth were the shadows her mother controlled.

Aunt Cadence's words echoed in her mind again, making her suck in a deep, deep breath. It didn't seem to be enough for the shocking revelation that had just been made a truth.

_You have a brother…a twin brother._

_She_ was a _twin?_

Of course, she was naturally very curious about this mysterious twin of hers. Would he look exactly like her—would he share the same pale silvery blue eyes and jet-black hair as her? Or were they just fraternal twins who didn't look exactly like each other?

She hoped the latter was true.

It pained her to think that there might actually be someone who looked exactly like her. If they really were identical twins…comparison between the two could only come down to their morals, values, and…examination results.

Her mind was something she valued very much, and she wanted to make the best use of it. As silly as that sounded, she knew that it meant a lot to her, and no one could change that.

No one, maybe except her brother.

Her _twin_ brother.

She sighed again, hating how depressed she sounded.

Linh was, to say the least, horrified at being a twin. Twins, or triplets, or anyone that shared the same womb at the same time, were hugely cast aside and discriminated against. If her twin brother went with her to Foxfire…wouldn't _everyone_ know that they were twins? She would be shamed so badly and—and her future in Foxfire would be completely destroyed.

And…she didn't want that. No matter how much Linh tried to deny it, deep down in her heart she knew that she couldn't let _anything_ get into her way, not even her own loved ones. That was considering if she'd grow to like her long-lost twin brother.

In one way or another, her twin brother would definitely _not_ be going to Foxfire. And she was going to be the one to make sure of that.

She glanced up at the moon again. It was already slowly turning translucent, the sky getting brighter as brilliant red hues peeked out of the now pure-white clouds.

The colour white should have brought her peace and quiet. But this time, it only made her think of a blank canvas. She frowned, tilting her head side to side, staring at the canvas and mimicked holding a brush. Then, with quick, deft, imaginary strokes, she painted in what she thought her twin brother would look like, and splashed a swooping wave of blue, towering over him and drowning him alive.

Linh gasped, tearing her grip away from her imaginary brush and blinking the image away. Getting her brother out of Foxfire forever was one thing. Murdering him and depriving him of the chance to live would be another. As someone who had immortality in their grasp, who was she to try and deprive another of her kind of the same thing?

Maybe everything was going to change soon enough.

For the better or for the worse, that was the only thing that really ever mattered.

Linh turned her back on the sky of the early morning and climbed the stairs back to her bedroom on the third floor. As soon as she closed the door and fell to the bed, the front door on the first floor swung open slowly to let in three elves, covered in a shroud of shadow and a veil of impending chaos.

* * *

The sound of faint voices drifted into Linh's ears. She frowned a little, and squeezed her eyes close. She still wanted to have some more sleep…She was so tired. Every part of her seemed to hurt so, so much.

The voices wouldn't seem to leave her alone. Sighing internally, she fluttered her eyes open dazedly. Flashes of black, silvery-blue swirled in her half-lidded eyesight, and she frowned even more, finally fully opening her eyes. She gaped at the sight she saw, and sat up straight in her bed, pulling the mattresses tighter around her, as if that could somehow protect her.

A boy, who looked around her age, was sitting on the edge of Linh's bed, his little hands playing with the linen sheet that she usually slept with. He looked a lot like her, with his jet-black hair and intelligent silvery, pale blue eyes. The only difference was that his eyebrows were a lot thicker and bolder, and the edges of his face looked sharper than hers, if that was even possible.

The first time he looked at her, she felt…safe. And secure. She tried to shake the feeling away, the feeling that only her mother had been able to make her feel. But even so, she released her tight, vice-like grip on her mattress, letting it fall to the bed. She let out a breath as he smiled at her, blinking his eyes as he stuck out his hand towards her.

Despite the sense of safety she had felt earlier, Linh stared down warily at his hand. His skin was the colour of cream, so like hers, and when she finally took his hand in hers and shook it, it felt soft—almost as soft as dandelion fluff.

"You're my tw—brother, right?" Linh deliberated if she should have said _twin_ or not. Maybe not. It was better to pretend they were just normal brother and sister—not that they were normal at all. But it was good to hide, like all elves always do, to create and build up the illusion that everything in their seemingly immaculate world was perfect. "…I'm Linh, what's your name?"

Just because she wasn't going to let him go to Foxfire with her, it didn't mean that she couldn't act nice to him. Maybe they could actually get along really well.

Just not in Foxfire.

Her brother grinned at her, showing his pair of perfect teeth which gleamed white. He actually would have looked absolutely adorable, if not for the wary glint that was always in his eyes. "I'm Tam."

_Tam._

His name was Tam.

She thought about his name, wondering how to get used to the foreign name, when the only name she really had to familiarise herself with was her mother's.

_Linh and Tam?_

_No,_ she told herself. _That doesn't sound right._

_Tam and Linh?_

Linh sighed. That sounded perfect, like their names had always been meant to be put in that order. Like…Tam was always meant to be in front of her.

Maybe she was always meant to be second. Second in everything, except for Foxfire.

Only for Foxfire, she was going to work to be the first. But for everything else, she would just cower and rely on Tam.

He seemed strong, both physically and mentally. So unlike her—they might look alike, but they were total opposites.

Well…at least, she would _make_ herself seem like the weaker one, to contrast against Tam.

To lead everyone under the false idea that Linh was the helpless one.

And when it was her turn to shine, she would surprise, shock everyone.

She would shine so bright that her light would obliterate the shadows of her own and everybody else.

And that was how Linh Song began to hide in her brother's shadow.


	2. the lake of harmonies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which the song family move to choralmere.

 Linh felt warm as she interlaced their hands together. The two of them went down the steps, hand in hand, chatting avidly like there was no tomorrow.

 She felt that she could really be herself in front of Tam.

 What made him stand out from talking to her mother was that Tam was the same age as her, which made it much easier to talk to him about stuff that only elves of the age of two would really understand.

 It is said that once humans grew up, they would lose all of their childish thinking and mindset, as they would turn out to have much more important things to stress and worry about as an adult.

 But Linh didn’t think it was the case with elves. What elves possessed that humans didn’t, was immortality, and enhanced intelligence. She thought they would not lose anything, because they could rest comfortably in the knowledge that they still had stretches of years and years ahead of them and would be so relaxed that anything wouldn’t slip their mind.

 But her mother didn’t seem to be the case. If Linh didn’t know better, she would have thought that her mother was a human, because she acted like a human, not at all understanding why Linh often thought or felt that way.

 Maybe her father was the same. Maybe that was why her parents got together in the first place.

 She bit the inside of her cheek at the thought of her father, and Tam saw. He released her hand, and nudged her side with his elbow. “Linh, what’s wrong?” His voice sounded so worried, it actually made Linh try not to worry. He seemed so easily influenced by her, it was as if when she gave the slightest push, he would teeter and topple and fall off the edge immediately.

 It pained her to envision that happening to Tam.

 “What’s our father like?” she whispered the question to him, suddenly aware of the uncomfortable silence in the house.

 She reached over to hold Tam’s hand again, noticing how he suddenly turned rigid. “You were staying with him, right? Uh…not to be too invasive…but where were you all this time?”

 She tried to make herself sound as innocently curious as possible, as she told herself again and again that she was his sister—his  _ twin  _ sister, but she wouldn’t say that out loud ever—and she had the right to ask him. After all, why wouldn’t Tam like their father, if the two of them had stayed together all the time? And where had their mother found them?

 He frowned for the first time. His dark eyebrows furrowed together, and paired with that stare that had suddenly turned intimidating, Linh felt truly afraid of her brother for the first time.

 When he finally opened his mouth to speak, they were almost at the end of the staircase. Tam nudged her, and pointed at the dark shadow that lurked in the corner of the living room, trying to listen to their conversation. He lifted his left index fingers to his lips.

 His eyes met hers, and even though he didn’t say anything, she knew what kind of message he was trying to convey to her:  _ it’s not safe to talk here. _

 Why would her mother want to be so sly and sneaky to use her talent as a Shade and deliberately eavesdrop on them? Did she not like the idea of Linh knowing something that Tam obviously knew?

 Whatever it was, she didn’t have the time to think more about it, because Tam had entered the dining room. She followed closely behind, reminding herself to slouch and put on a vulnerable, weak act. But her lazy expression soon turned into shock and anger as she surveyed the dining room.

 The small round table that occupied less than half of the space in the spacious dining room was long gone, and instead it had been replaced with a long table that stretched one side of the room to the middle of the room. Linh’s mother sat at one end of the long table…while her father was on the other end. Linh tried not to gape at him.

 Unlike Tam’s simple tunic and long trousers, or Linh’s long-sleeved blouse and knee-length skirt, their father looked like a Councillor when compared to them. His pale blue eyes looked ice cold as he scrutinised them in a way that made Linh feel very uncomfortable. He wore a tight dark blue vest and a pair of tailored crimson red pants. His cape, which looked to be made of the finest of silk, was the colour of pure black, and reached down almost to his ankles. And at the very centre of all his glory, was the Song crest, two wolves of silver-grey reared up and howling.

 Mai Song’s eyes were as cold as her voice as she met her daughter’s helpless gaze. “Tam, Linh, please have the manners to greet your father. Since it is your first time, I will let it pass. The next time you commit such ridiculous mistakes, be warned of impending punishment.”

 She sounded so stiff, so formal, so  _ emotionless _ , that Linh kept wondering if this was really the elf she’d grown up to know. Even if they had only known each other for near to three years, she’d already felt that her mother was her greatest blessing.

 But now she was like a Councillor, in merciless control of everything in Linh’s world, not allowed to display any sort of emotion towards anybody should it sway her supposedly unbiased, just choices. Slight tears prickled at Linh’s eyes, and she blinked it back furiously, refusing to burst out crying in front of her mother and father.

 As she gazed at her father while trying to avoid eye contact with him, she realised with a sinking feeling of dread in her stomach that this wasn’t the kind of family she’d always yearned and longed for.

 She’d always wanted to solve the mystery of her missing long-lost father and maybe even meet him to reunite with each other, but now she knew that she would have preferred if her mother had never sought out the Council to find them. Now the usually warm and cheery atmosphere in their elvin house seemed to grow cold, as cold as the ice in her father’s eyes.

 She wanted to open her mouth to retort at her mother’s scandalous order, but in the corner of her eye she could see Tam shake his head ever so slightly. She bit the inside of her cheek to stop her from crying out loud, and nodded sombrely, mumbling a “yes, mother” under her breath.

_  It isn’t fair, _ Linh thought.  _ It isn’t fair at all. _ She wanted to say something less insulting this time, when she saw her father curl his lip down at them in disdain. Quan Song’s eyebrows scrunched together—just like Tam’s had—and he said, “It’s heartening to see you after all these years, Linh.” Was it just Linh’s wishful thinking, or did the edge to his voice soften a little when he said her name? But the feeling of hope immediately died down when he added, “Though it’s a shame that you and Tam are  _ twins.” _

 He spat out the word like it was venom to his mouth, and Tam’s fists curled ever so slightly. Either Lord Song decided to ignore him, or he was completely oblivious, because he made no reaction to Tam at all. Instead, he continued with his speech which made Linh want to lunge at him like a savage animal until she had clawed both his eyes out—although she shuddered ever so slightly at the image of her eyeless father. “We really don’t wish to draw attention—and attention as in the  _ infamous _ way. That is why you two are going to keep your mouths shut and pretend that Tam is one year older than Linh. You’re not twins. Understood?”

 Linh would have given anything to pretend that she and Tam were just normal brother and sister. But now having taken an intense loathing to her father, she clenched her fists so hard that they cracked loudly.

 A rush of embarrassment overwhelmed her as her parents and Tam swivelled their attention to her, and she unclenched her fists slowly. “Sorry,” she mumbled, thinking it would be good to keep up the good girl act for as long as she could manage. “Please, go on.”

 Tam stared incredulously at her. “Please tell me you’re not actually considering this,” he said, and Linh tilted her head upwards to look at him in surprise. It was the first time he had directly opposed their parents.

 But either way, it would make her easier to pass as the weak one, contrasted against her bitter, rebellious twin  _ brother. _ After all, everyone expected girls and women alike to be weak and frail, standing in the men’s shadows. “I don’t—”

 Her mother rendered her silent with a skewering glare, and Linh gladly shut up. And then she directed her glare at her son, folding her arms across her chest crossly. “I can see that you’ll be quite the rebellious child. It’s clear that your father has handled being in a difficult place much better than you have.”

 That was the cue for Linh to ask where they had been staying before they moved here. “What place?” she said timidly—it wasn’t hard to pretend she was timid, considering the fact that she was only a two year-old child.

_ “That  _ is none of your business,” snapped Tam, making Linh blanch, taking a shocked step back. Was Tam going to be rude and cold to her from now on?

 She expected one of her parents to snap back and scold Tam for being impolite to his sister, but their father merely sniffed disdainfully, and said, “Well, if being rude to each other is going to help you two agree to pretend that you are one year apart in age, I’m not going to object.”

 Tam shrugged, which didn’t really look like a shrug for a two year-old. “Whatever.”

 Satisfied that the matter was settled, Linh’s mother snapped her fingers twice, and instantly the once-empty dinner table became laden with fruitful and scrumptious-looking elvin dishes. “Take a seat, Tam and Linh.”

 It was elvin culture to address the eldest child first, followed by the second oldest, and so on. The reason was simply because the elves believed that the purest of their parents’ genetics would always go to the first child, and it would keep on thinning and becoming diluter and diluter as each child was born. It seemed like her parents were taking this  _ ‘Tam is one year older than Linh’ _ thing very seriously.

 It was what Linh had wanted.

 But somehow she couldn’t muster up the strength to embrace it.

 Not after she’d listened to her father and her mother freely insult them for who they were.

 Inwardly, her thoughts were raging, picking up like a stirring whirlwind. But on the outside, Linh just sat on the chair next to her mother. It may or may not have been in the hope that her mother would finally soften up and morph back into the warm, bubbly person that she used to be.

 Her mother’s facial expression was unreadable, but it was also unmovable. Linh decided it wasn’t worth it anymore. Her heart ached from the sadness and grief, but she assured herself that she would be all right. She had Tam now, after all. Even though he was now acting like she was going against everything that he believed in.

 There was still a lot to understand about her twin brother.

 Their first dinner together was completely silent, save for the constant political chatter from their parents. It was also very awkward. Their parents did not attempt to make any small talk with them, and Tam was directly ignoring her as well. After they’d finished eating their breakfast—which was an assorted salad made up of raw umber leaves and bay laurel—Quan accompanied Tam to somewhere else in the house, probably his new room, leaving Linh and her mother alone together.

 “Linh, we’re going to move out of here in two months. I expect you to pack your possessions neatly into the box that I’d conjured up in your room. You don’t have many belongings, so it shouldn’t be hard.”

 “You’re right.” Linh’s eyes focused on Mai. “Not many things belong to me. And now you don’t, too. I’ve lost you.”

* * *

 

 Linh tossed the last item into the ornate chest, trying to catch her breath. Her heart was beating too fast, and her mind was spinning too quickly. And her emotions were running too wildly. Rage and fury pulsed through her, and she banged the cover of the chest close for good effect.

 Why were they even moving out of here? This place, this house, was her  _ home. _ Her  _ memories. _ Her  _ childhood. _ Even though she had only lived here for two years, and even though she was still a child, she’d grown to love this place and treat it as her home, treat it as where she belonged. Even though the dining room had already changed from warm to cold, it was still her home. She could feel little bits and pieces of the happy times with her mother still living in this house. They were struggling to live, but they were still alive.

 Moving away to a completely new place meant that they were putting everything behind, leaving everything behind to die. And the clean blank slate would be peppered with the likes of their breakfast earlier, and that would surely continue on for years and years. Linh had never understood the humans for believing in a place called heaven and a place called hell, but now she knew what they meant by having  _ a hell of a life. _

 And  _ her mother.  _ Linh was glad Mai had been stunned after she had reiterated, but it wasn’t because that gave her the time to escape before she exploded.

 It was because that helped her hope that there was still a little bit of the old her living deep down inside.

 Could a person change so much in the timespan of one night?

 Or was it because she didn’t change, her mask merely fell off?

 But why would she be obliged to behave in such a way in front of her long-lost husband and her son?

 Was it because Quan’s outrageous beliefs and morals convinced her to believe in the same things as him?

 Was this even normal thoughts for a two year-old?

 She forced herself to take deep breaths, calming herself down. However unfair it was, however unjustified everything was, she still needed to remember to keep up the pretense that she was meek, timid, and would submit to any order given by her parents. Though that had been one big slip up with her mother just now, she needed to maintain her act and make people take pity on her.

 Hopefully, she would be the twin that attended Foxfire with lesser problems.

* * *

 

 Linh stared up at the glittering mansion set by the brilliant blue sea, wishing it would be kind to her.

 Of course it didn’t listen.

 Her hands were empty, because her mother had already conjured their chests into the mansion. The sky was pale blue, the colour of Linh’s eyes, which blended into the cloud-white colour of the walls of the house. Diamonds lined the borders of the double doors and the windows, making it sparkle as brightly as the sun. The estate itself looked like a weirdly shaped cloud, with its two towers connected to the main building stretching up above their heads and gleaming blindingly in the natural light. It looked very grand amidst all its radiance.    

But there was something about it that made Linh feel cold and numb, like she was about to enter a glittering prison.

 A river ran along the borders of the mansion, separating into several tiny tributaries, before converging and forming the ocean, which was right behind them.

 It was like a moat, kept to prevent unwanted visitors from attempting to infiltrate the mansion—or preventing anyone from going  _ out _ the mansion.

 The niggling feeling that she was about to enter a glittering prison got even stronger by that realisation.

 But how were they even going to cross the river to get to the mansion? It seemed widely impossible. What if she fell into the water and drowned?

 She gripped her satchel tighter, needing something to hold to seek comfort. She didn’t find it.

 Ever since that day about a month ago, Mai had been keeping a fair distance away from Linh, and Linh honestly was confused. She had just slipped up and shown that she was not going to take any of her nonsense. Didn’t that give her mother a chance to reprimand her for it and punish her further?

 She also didn’t seem like she was giving her the cold shoulder—it actually seemed like she was  _ afraid _ of talking to her anymore.

 And since Tam wasn’t talking to her as well, and Quan hardly spoke to her except when he was chastising her, the one month she spent in her old home felt very, very lonely.

 Most of her time was used on staring at the cold, empty walls of her bedroom, and wishing she hadn’t took such a short time packing her things into that stupid chest.

 Everywhere in the house that she set foot upon seemed foreign and strange.

 Like it was already forgotten.

 “Welcome to Choralmere,” said Quan, the sudden strong winds swirling around them threatening to take his voice away with them. Linh struggled to keep her footing firm in the strong sea breeze. She stumbled forward, almost plummeting into the rushing current and jagged rocks of the river—

  She was pulled back by a strong, firm hand. Linh gasped, and backed away a few steps due to the inertia. She raised her eyes to lock gazes with Tam.

 He had no expression on his face, except for the small furrow in his thick brows as he said, too soft for their parents to hear, “You have to be more careful here.”

 Linh didn’t realise how true that was—she would only know after a full scope of nine years had passed, when childish ignorance would turn into bitter regret. But now, anger coursed through her veins, shocked that Tam, who had not spoken to her for two full months, was suddenly obliged to help her like she was some helpless little girl.

 She yanked her brother’s hand off, and flipped her shoulder-length hair—her father had proclaimed it too long and insisted she cropped her hair to a ‘sensible’ length—as she hissed, “I can take care of myself.”

 “Sure you can,” scoffed Tam, his previously expressionless complexion contorting into a scornful scowl. Rage boiled in the recesses of Linh’s gut, but she held it in, trying to smother it to sleep. Fighting with her brother wouldn’t do well for her ‘good girl’ act.

 She slumped her shoulders in defeat as their father hollered, “Enough!” After the sought-after silence was acquired, he closed his eyes—as if he was meditating. After thirty-four seconds (Linh counted), he raised his arms slowly like he was holding up the sky, and the moving water in the river stuttered to an abrupt stop and rushed up into a sky in a thick stream of swirling water.

 Linh had to hold in her gasp—she hadn’t realised her father was a Hydrokinetic—and she hadn’t thought to find out what his special ability was too, in the span of the short two months they had been staying together. But then again, the two of them didn’t really care about each other.

 So  _ this _ was how they were going to cross the water.

 “Come on, Tam and Linh,” Mai said quietly, finally opening her mouth to speak today. She reached for Tam’s hand with her left arm, and looked at Linh with a pleading expression.

 Linh wanted to blatantly stare at her and ignore her as she crossed the river by herself, but with a grudging internal sigh, she let her mother curl her slender fingers around her tiny little hand, and the three of them crossed the now-dry river, skipping over the tributaries gingerly. Quan followed along shortly, still holding up the rushing water. There was a clear strain to his face, but instead of focusing on the water up in the sky, his eyes were fixed on Mai.

 Linh wondered why. But she gave it no further thought. After they had crossed every single body of water, Quan’s tensed shoulders relaxed and he flicked his hand, causing the water to crash back into the river, flowing wildly and freely again. He stopped to fish out a silk kerchief from his cape pocket, wiping a drop of sweat that was making its way down from his pale forehead.

 “Are you alright?” her mother asked, watching him with a worried, concerned expression. Even Tam looked slightly perturbed as he tilted his head several angles to scrutinize his father. Linh frowned at him as he struggled to catch his breath.

 She hadn’t known that special abilities could take such a huge toll on someone. She had always thought that everything would come naturally once someone manifested a special ability. By merely lifting the water for a measly thirty seconds, Quan looked like he was about to collapse onto the grass.

_ Interesting. _

 She tucked it into the back of her mind, in case this was anything that she can use to help her in the future.

 Another fifty seconds slipped by before Quan muttered, “I’m fine.”

 He stalked past a bemused Linh to stand in front of the jeweled entrance. He dug his hand into his cape pocket for a second time, taking out not a piece of cloth but a silver key that looked like its end had been dipped in molten gold. It shone as bright as Choralmere as the sunlight hit its edges, and Quan slipped it into the keyhole below the giant knocker which resembled the identical wolves engraved in the Song family crest.

 “This has been your father’s family’s estate for almost nine thousand years now,” Mai said, sounding like a lecturer as she filled Tam and Linh with information about their new residing place. “This place has been passed down generation over generation. In each generation, there will always be a Hydrokinetic who is destined to be passed over Choralmere. Which, in dwarven, means—”

 “The lake of harmonies,” Quan interrupted, sounding a little begrudged over the information dump Mai was giving the twins. “Let’s not stay out here any longer.”

 He snapped his fingers, causing the double doors to swing open smoothly and soundlessly. The interior of Choralmere was soothingly dark compared to its exterior, but as soon as Quan swept open the thick curtains draping over the full-length glass windows overlooking the ocean, light shone into the historic halls, bringing life to the whole place.

 Inside her mind, Mai's words were echoing over and over again. 

_  In each generation, there will always be a Hydrokinetic who is destined to be passed over Choralmere. _

 She and Tam were the only two of the new generation moving into Choralmere. Which meant one of them was already destined to be a Hydrokinetic. Which meant that one of them was born to be the  _ special  _ one.

 Linh hoped it was Tam. She didn't want even more attention being paid to her. Anyway, it probably wasn't her, judging by how the water in the river almost wanted to kill her just now.

 The dense carpet muffled her footsteps as Linh shuffled into the hallway, not sure what to think of the whole place. The ceiling was high, much higher than where she was used to staying before everything changed, and from it sparkling chandeliers hung. The walls were crystalline, glowing with unblemished light as they caught the reflection of the sunlight from the ocean.

 Big portraits of adult elves who bore both slight and striking resemblances to herself were plastered onto the walls, their unblinking eyes watching Linh’s every move.

 She shuddered, trying not to look them in the eye as she directed her gaze somewhere else to distract herself. The hallway divided into two, and Quan took the left, which led into a vast, big space where a sweeping staircase took flight from one side of the room and spiraled upwards into somewhere Linh couldn’t see.

 Her breath got rather shaky and heavy as they started up the grand staircase, and for some reason her head started to spin slightly when she looked down at the looming height. Biting her lip, she forced herself to look up, keeping a firm hold on the banister, and blanched when they reached the first step of the spiral staircase—

 And stopped all of a sudden.

 Linh blinked in confusion, but she had no time to debate whether she should risk opening her mouth to question her parents as her father shouted, “Three!” Her grip on the handrail tightened even further and a small scream escaped her lips as her world got turned upside down. Air rushed against her face, rendering her breathless for two seconds—before she was righted once again, wrapping her nanoscopic arms around the uprights of the stairs, gasping for breath like her father had done after he had held up the water in the rushing river.

 “This is a Vortinator,” Mai’s voice said. Linh couldn’t see as her eyesight was blurred and her eyes half-lidded, but she would know that voice anywhere. “It might be a little rough for first-timers.”

 She knew everyone was watching her, but she made no move to let go, inwardly whimpering at the horrible experience. This time, it wasn’t Tam who grabbed hold of her hand when she was about to fall into the river. It was her father himself, holding on to Linh’s wrist in a vice-like grip, muttering something incoherent under his breath. But Linh’s sharp ears had picked up one word.

_ Useless. _

 The word hit her harder than she’d expected it to, and she slouched even further as she was forcibly pulled to a room that seemed too big for her tiny three year-old body. Quan set her on the enormous canopy bed, and instantly the dizziness from the Vortinator ride faded away.

 “This is your room, Linh,” said Mai, finally addressing her by her name. Linh was too tired to see her expression, and she was tired of looking at her traitor face anyway. “We’ll call you when it’s time for dinner. Friends of Quan and mine will be over here then, so make sure you are ready when you have to go down.”

 Linh felt like it was her cue to say something, so she just said, “Okay.”

 “Please address your mother when you talk to her, Linh.” Quan’s voice was irritated and had an edge to it, like he was already tired of her and was considering kicking her out of his house.

_ Um, no way am I going to call that woman  _ my _ mother. _

 “Okay.”

 “…” Linh opened her eyes a fraction to see her parents exchange a secret glance with each other. She expected them to lash out at her any second.

 But to her surprise, Quan turned away, his facial expression unreadable, while Mai just sighed—like summer turning into autumn, a falling leaf from a tree—and said, “See you later, Linh.”

 She sounded so defeated, Linh was almost obliged to reply with a “see you later” as well.

 But she didn’t.

 A single tear streaked down Linh’s cheek as the door closed with a soft thud, sealing the moment of frosty silence.


	3. beautiful broken things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're kind of confusing," said Tam as their parents' footsteps faded away. "I don't really understand you, Linh."
> 
> "Why do you say that?" she asked a little curiously, turning around to face her brother.
> 
> "I don't know." Tam scrunched up his face like he was trying to think of the perfect way to phrase his thoughts into words that came out of his mouth. "You're kind of…two-faced."
> 
> Linh's mouth ran dry as she gaped at her twin brother. Her mind was racing through so many thoughts, so many possibilities that it was a total blur as she heard herself say, "Two-faced?"
> 
> "Sometimes you're really shy and quiet and meek and all, but sometimes you're like me. Sometimes you're rebellious and bitter and angry." He took one look at Linh's shocked face, and tilted his head to the left. "You don't really think I've noticed at all? It's sort of obvious."

The bell for dinner rang much earlier than Linh had expected.

The clashing sound of two gigantic gongs banging together rang through the air, almost piercing her eardrums. She jumped out of her bed—which was still way too big for her—and pressed herself against the closed bedroom door, her heart picking up speed as soon as she heard the sound of steady footsteps nearing.

The doorknob twisted with a soft click, and Linh ushered herself backward slowly with the outward movement of the swinging door. She plastered herself against the wall, making herself as small as possible to hide behind the open door. With bated breath, she kept completely silent as she heard her mother call out, "Linh? Are you there?"

Linh's heart twisted at her voice, and she felt a sudden urge to let out a sneeze. Her hand went up to plug her nose, but after a few seconds she let go and took a deep breath and—

_ACHOO!_

She sighed and rubbed her itchy nose a little as she got hauled out of behind the door.

"Linh, please don't hide. It is dusty there, and dangerous too. You might get hurt."

_Please, the only way I'll be getting hurt is when I'm with you._

"Also, it's only manners to respond to your mother when she calls you for dinner."

"Okay." Linh hesitated for a long second, before adding begrudgingly, "Mother."

She could see Mai's tensed-up shoulders relax, like it was a relief to her that she finally answered her politely. "Good."

She handed a bundle of fresh clothes to Linh, and Linh closed her fingers around the silken fabric. It felt like smooth, cool flowing water to her hands. "Please change as fast as possible. Put on your cape with our family crest as well. Our guests will be coming in a moment."

She paused for a while—like she was thinking of something else to say—but then shook her head and closed the door behind her. Linh frowned and unfolded the bundle of clothes. A long, light cyan-coloured tight-fitting silk tunic that parted at the side, and a pair of snow-white ankle-length pants completed the look.

Linh opened her walk-in wardrobe and slipped the tunic and pants on, then pinned a dark grey cape around her shoulders with the Song family crest, in accordance to her mother's request. She combed through her messy hair with a silver brush, then tossed it aside and looked at herself in the full-length mirror.

She looked pretty, the long tunic complementing her eyes perfectly, but she also looked stupid.

She couldn't believe she looked like her mother that much.

But for good measure, she threw in a smile for herself and walked out of the room, and let her mother lead her down the stairs using the Vortinator. This time, she didn't even bother to hold on to the handrail. And surprisingly, she didn't feel dizzy at all.

* * *

The sleek, long dining table somewhat resembled the one they had in her old house, but twenty times grander. The table was made entirely of smooth, shining marble, the edges lined with gold. Wolves with their craning necks replaced the legs of the table, their strong jaws gaped open as if they were mid-howl.

Linh took her place unsteadily in a pristine glass chair herself after Mai tried to carry her up to her seat and failed terribly. Tam also rejected Mai's help, clambering skillfully onto the chair beside Linh. He was dressed just as finely as Linh, and wore the exact same long tunic and pants as her, except that his was tailored to fit the build of a boy.

Linh tensed at his presence, and Tam seemed to know that he was making her uncomfortable. When their parents weren't looking, he leaned sideways and whispered in Linh's ear, "Look, I'm on your side, okay?"

_Doesn't seem like it. Anyway,_ I'm _not on your side. I'm going to have trouble studying in Foxfire and that's all your fault. Why did you have to come and ruin my life? Why?_

Tears threatened to fall out of her eyes, but she blinked them away, even though she knew Tam had already seen them. He would probably mistake her tears for being moved. That was what everyone would assume anyway.

Nobody would ever know that her mind was filled with some of the most devious, scheming thoughts ever known. Nobody would ever know that Linh Song was actually smarter and slyer than they thought…until she topped the Foxfire entrance examinations.

She _needed_ to.

But all she said to Tam was, "Okay. You're on my side."

Before Tam could reply to that, a tinkling sound like windpipes chimed in the air, signaling the arrival of a visitor. Quan and Mai rose at the same time, then looked at each other.

Finally, Quan's eyes softened and he said, "Let's just go, both of us."

Linh smacked her hand against her forehead in disgust as she watched Mai take Quan's offered hand tenderly and walked out of the dining room to open the door for their visitor. Luckily, her parents were too enraptured by each other to notice her.

"You're kind of confusing," said Tam as their parents' footsteps faded away. "I don't really understand you, Linh."

"Why do you say that?" she asked a little curiously, turning around to face her brother.

"I don't know." Tam scrunched up his face like he was trying to think of the perfect way to phrase his thoughts into words that came out of his mouth. "You're kind of…two-faced."

Linh's mouth ran dry as she gaped at her twin brother. Her mind was racing through so many thoughts, so many possibilities that it was a total blur as she heard herself say, "Two-faced?"

"Sometimes you're really shy and quiet and meek and all, but sometimes you're like _me_. Sometimes you're rebellious and bitter and angry." He took one look at Linh's shocked face, and tilted his head to the left. "You don't really think I've noticed at all? It's sort of obvious."

Linh closed her mouth, took in a deep breath, then opened her mouth to try and speak again. No words came out at all.

She was at a complete loss for words.

Was Tam good at reading people? Or was she really just plain obvious?

This…was not good. Not good at all.

"So which is the real you, Linh? Are you really that timid, or are you really bitter?" Tam suddenly smiled at her as he continued, "I'm guessing that you're actually bitter. From my experience, bitter feelings are usually the realest emotions. You're probably just pretending to be placid and hiding your true feelings."

_How could he know what was under her sleeve all along?_

"I…" her voice trailed off when the sound of footsteps made itself clear, and she conveniently lapsed into silence as Quan and Mai reentered the dining room with three visitors following behind them quietly. Two males, and a female. All adults.

"Lord Cassius, Lord Finnian, and Lady Iskra, this is Tam and Linh. Tam and Linh, this is Lord Cassius, Lord Finnian, and Lady Iskra," said the twins' father, sounding monotone and professional as he gestured mildly to each and every one of them. A polite smile was plastered on his lips, but it was the kind of oily smile that didn't really reach his eyes.

Linh instantly crossed him off as 'suspicious creeper'.

Linh fiddled with the hem of the long-sleeved tunic as watched Tam greet the visitors the traditional way. When it was her turn, she did the exact same, bowing her head slightly and shaking each of the visitors' hands with both of her hands.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," she murmured, lowering her eyes and avoiding looking any of the adults in the eye. Lady Iskra, a talented Technopath—who seemed to be the nicest of the lot—praised Tam and Linh for their politeness and handed them two matching bracelets to wear around their wrists.

Linh stared at the jeweled bracelet. The light streaming through the windows of Choralmere hit the gems of every colour of the spectrum, causing them to shine iridescently.

Great. Another shiny ornament to add to shiny Choralmere.

But it turned out not to be useless after all, as Tam and Linh both gasped when they saw the biggest jewel of all on each of their bracelets blink rapidly, refusing to be ignored. Lady Iskra laughed at their jumpy reactions, then proceeded to explain that the bracelets react to each other when the two of them are close by.

So it technically interlocked Tam and Linh together. As if being twins still didn't pull them close enough. Linh was planning not to say a word to anyone during the dinner. But she caught the hawk-like way her father was eyeing her, and pursed her lips.

"Thank you, Lady Iskra," she said, proud of her voice for not quivering in the slightest. She hoped the expression on her face wasn't giving away her disgust as she continued to praise her, "It's very beautiful. And…it's quite useful, as well."

Lady Iskra was a Technopathy Mentor at Foxfire. She was the first Mentor Linh had met, and she needed to make a good impression on her.

"I agree with Linh," said Tam, almost making Linh jump in surprise as he smiled up at the Technopath, who was blushing slightly at the compliments. "It would only bring us closer than we already were, which is not unexpected, seeing as we are t—"

"Tam," Quan snapped, cutting his son off and causing everyone at the dining table to turn their attention to him. Linh tried to ignore how Tam had almost revealed the fact that they were _twins_. He seemed strangely eager to break all the rules and regulations their parents had set down for them. "That's enough talking. Mai, I think we're all quite hungry now. Shall we?"

Mai snapped her fingers, and conjured up a feast of epic proportions. Plates lined the sides of the long table, already heaped with steaming amounts of scrumptious-looking food. Everyone, even Tam, gasped in wonder as the silky white tablecloth flared at their feet. After the excitement from the entertainment had faded away, Linh was left staring at her porcelain plate of purple vegetables in grey-green gravy, wishing she had an appetite to finish everything.

Hesitatingly, she picked up a pair of china chopsticks—she'd never really used this kind of cutlery before—and shakily fished up the first vegetable, which was dripping with its thick sauce. Before it could slip out of the chopsticks' grasp, she stuffed it in her mouth and chewed. It was salty and seasoned, but Linh liked it.

After Mai gave an explanation on how to hold the chopsticks properly, Linh became a natural and soon her whole plate was finished. Tam didn't seem to have any trouble using the chopsticks too—but he grasped the techniques much slower than Linh had, which made Linh happier than she should've been.

"So, Quan," the man named Cassius said. He was addressing Quan, but his beady blue eyes were focused on Tam and Linh. "I don't believe you've ever said anything about this, but how old are your children again?"

Without meaning to, Tam and Linh exchanged sideway glances at each other, and then turned to look at Quan. His face was expressionless, but Mai was visibly taken by surprise and helplessness.

What their father had said two months ago, when she had first met him, rang in her head over and over again like a broken record.

_We really don't wish to draw attention—and attention as in the infamous way. That is why you two are going to keep your mouths shut and pretend that Tam is one year older than Linh. You're not twins. Understood?_

Linh bit her lip as Quan finally spoke. "Tam is three, and Linh is two."

And suddenly, Linh was two years old again. The two year-old happy girl that still had her mother by her side, the girl that would excel with flying colours and graduate from Foxfire's elite levels, the girl that didn't have a care in the world.

The girl she had been before everything changed.

Rage bubbled and boiled in her stomach, coursing through her veins as she stood up abruptly, not really knowing what she was doing. But Tam stood up a split second after, his eyes filled with the same fire she was feeling right now.

Tam shouted, "Well, sorry to disappoint, but he's wrong. I'm three, and Linh is three as well. In fact, we're only born minutes apart. We're _twins!"_

Linh glared at her father. "I can attest to that. A-are you really going to go on spouting lies about our age to everyone?"

She cursed herself for stammering. She just wasn't used to talking loudly, or confronting someone directly, in front of an audience. And she already knew the answer to her question.

Their parents were _never_ going to stop trying to put everyone under the illusion that Tam was one year older than Linh.

All of it was just smoke, mirrors, and lies.

And she would have _nothing_ to do with them.

_Forget about making good impressions on Lady Iskra, Linh. This is more important. My identity is more important. Our identities are more important._

_I am who I am. I am Linh Song, and twin sister to Tam Song. There will be no denial about it._

_I can't go along with my parents. I can't._

"Pathetic," Tam spat, as silence settled into the dining room. Mai's lip was quivering, like she was badly shaken by the whole dramatic scene. Quan's face was the colour of the purple vegetables Linh had consumed. Lord Cassius, Lord Finnian and Lady Iskra just looked shocked, as if they couldn't believe what had just happened had happened in front of their own eyes.

_Let the world disappear…we'll be safe…somewhere only we can find…I'll be what you want, when everything is gone...everything that hurts us drops off…_

Linh hesitated only a moment, before making up her mind. Taking a deep breath for confidence and conviction, she grabbed Tam's hand—it felt perfectly right, resting in her own hand. Then, she pulled the two of them out of the dining room and ran away to an unknown future.

* * *

They ended up in a vast room crammed with scrolls and thick hardback books. Linh struggled to catch her breath as she closed the door silently behind them and shoved a heavy ancient-looking chair against the door. And then she took in the wonder of the room, pondering in where exactly she had taken the two of them.

Whenever she breathed in deeply, the soothing smell of years and years of stories calmed her down instantly. Shelves and shelves of books surrounded them and towered over them ten inches high, making Linh's heart beat faster and her mouth gape in awe. Tam seemed just as captivated, his little hands running along the tops of the book spines—his eyes scanning the titles avidly. So Linh decided to do the same and explore this new world.

She was taught to read by her mother—and she finally found a use for the reading techniques crammed in her brain. The almost illegible runes seemed to morph into understandable, relatable images and soon, she had picked up an interesting title named _The Elvin Expertise._

She opened the relatively thin book and breathed in the musty smell of the book and gagged. Her eyes landed on the short author's note. The book covered every known elvin ability and went into each of them in detail, though the author had advised his readers to borrow books focusing on only one ability as the subject matter if specific information was sought after.

Tam came and joined her afterwards, a few books in tow. "What are you reading?" he asked, peering over her shoulder as she sat on a cushioned throne-like chair, completely focused on reading _The Elvin Expertise._ "Telepaths?"

_Yes, Telepaths. You should know yourself…you act like one._

"In the elvin nobility, the most common special ability one can find would be telepathy," Linh read out softly, her eyes scanning one word after one word, one line after one line until it became a quick, natural process—just like how the process of learning to hold chopsticks had been. "The basics of telepathy would be mind-reading. The elvin mind is silent to everyone, but Telepaths are able to stretch their consciousness into other elves' minds, and read their thoughts. Alden Vacker, one of the most prestigious and powerful Telepaths the Lost Cities has ever known, describes reading thoughts as a second voice breezing through his own mind. Even though Telepaths are gifted with the ability to read minds, the first rule of telepathy states that they are not allowed to read any minds without the owner's permission. Telepathy also enhances telekinesis…" she trailed off, looking up to lock gazes with Tam. "Don't you want to read your own books?" She gestured to the books Tam was still holding in both of his arms.

Tam flushed, something Linh had never seen until now. He looked different when he blushed. He looked…softer. Warmer, somehow. "But yours is so interesting. Mine are just…"

_Boring?_

Linh stood up from her seat, placing her book on the glass coffee table in front of her before walking over to Tam and requesting to see his books. He handed them over to her reluctantly.

Her eyes flickered over the title embossed in gold on the front of the book at the top of the stack. _"Foxfire—A History?"_ She gasped loudly at the word 'Foxfire', then looked at Tam pleadingly. "Please, can I read this book as well? If you want, I can find you some other book. Please?"

Tam jumped at her sudden outburst, but Linh was too busy to apologise. Her head was running through all the infinite possibilities and benefits she could have if she insisted to read the book.

She needed to know everything she needed to know, to be a star student at Foxfire. And why not take a shot learning about Foxfire's history as well? It would only impress the Mentors at Foxfire further.

Tam must've noticed the way her voice had went up an octave higher, and the fact that she had used two _please_ s in one breath, because he raised an eyebrow at her. "Um…okay. Whatever. Anyway, I think you have better tastes in books, so we can share books."

"But…will they allow us?" Linh asked, suddenly thinking of why they had ended up here in the library in the first place. Fear lodged in her throat and she swallowed.

"We can make a bargain with them or something like that. Just don't say that you'll exchange these books with our permission for them to lie about our age."

"I guess that works," said Linh. "They should have found us already. _Or,_ she's eavesdropping on our conversation with her shadow."

Her eyes instinctively roved over to the chair still shoved against the doors, and strained her ears, picking up faint footsteps in the background.

"Well, speak of the devil," muttered Tam, looking left and right frantically. Then all of a sudden, he grabbed Linh's hand, and rushed the two of them over to a door, hidden in slight shadow.

"What if it's locked?" Linh hissed as Tam reached for the doorknob. Miraculously, it turned, and Tam pushed it open, dragged Linh inside, and shut the door, just as the footsteps got louder.

The place they had just entered was flooded in complete darkness, but once Linh thought to snap her fingers, light obliterated the blackness and brought back her visibility. Still holding on to Tam's hand—the only comfort she now had—Linh gazed around at her surroundings, taking in everything with a pinch of salt, but she was still awestruck at the many wondrous things Choralmere held.

They seemed to have entered a room that had been forgotten for centennial. The stone walls were cracked with age, and ivy vines crawled over the hairline, minute fissures. Some of the cracks, though, had been filled in with gold that shone dimly in the light—like a slapdash effort to preserve the place. Linh found it interesting that they had used gold to fill in the cracks.

It was like her ancestors had believed that things were more beautiful for having been broken.

"What _is_ this place?" she whispered, hesitating for a while before lifting her hand to run her fingers along the seams of golden. Then her eyes caught an inscription carved into the stone, and squinted to read it. "The Garden of Beautiful Broken Things?"

"What kind of name is that?" scoffed Tam. "Even Choralmere is better. And it's strange to have a garden _in_ a mansion, isn't it?"

Linh didn't reply as she walked further on, her shoes stepping on fallen leaves from a tree, making a loud crunching noise. The sound of cicadas and crickets rang through the air, making her feel at ease. The song of birds chirped in her ears, causing her to smile to herself. The beauty of the music was surreal.

It was unbelievable that there were still plants and animals thriving in this stone room. The artificial light seemed to be enough for them.

A round stone table rested in the center of the small room, with several small stone stools surrounding. Linh's eyes widened as she realised what this meant.

A secret, forgotten room hidden in the library.

Peace and quiet.

_Let the world disappear…we'll be safe…somewhere only we can find…I'll be what you want, when everything is gone...everything that hurts us drops off…_

"This could be our secret hideout, Tam," she whispered, whirling around to look at Tam. Tam raised an eyebrow at her, but let her continue. "We can hide our books here and read, without our parents disturbing us. It's perfect."

"Well, if they _don't_ know about this place I guess it would be fine," remarked Tam thoughtfully. "But weren't they searching the whole place to find us just now? That's why we stumbled upon this place?"

Linh halted hesitatingly at Tam's words, her mind running too fast for her to catch up. _Did_ her parents know about this place? Probably not, because it looked so old and forgotten and ancient. This clearly was Mai's first time in Choralmere, but for Quan, this was probably where he spent his childhood. Linh's father didn't strike her as the exploring type, but that wasn't the point. Something seemed off, and there was a niggling voice in her mind that grew louder when she thought about Quan's childhood.

Then it hit her.

"Tam," she said. "You still have to tell me where you and your father had been, before my mother found you."

There was this foggy cloud of mystery that she had still yet to discover, and it was killing her not to know.

Tam turned away from her, making it impossible for Linh to see his facial expression. "I can't tell you that, Linh. My father told me it's classified and I shouldn't ever tell you."

Now it was Linh's turn to raise her eyebrow at him. "Why not, Tam? Why not? It isn't like you're one to abide by your father's instructions, is it?

She couldn't understand why he couldn't tell her. Was it that hard? Was it that secretive?

There was another reason why she hated this. Two months ago, right before everything had changed, on that fateful night, her mother had set off somewhere to find Tam and Quan. She had refused to answer Linh's question. The only question that ever mattered.

_"_ _Are they really that important? Are they really more important than_ me?"

Was Tam really more important than her? Was her father really more important than her?

Mai obviously thought so, which pained Linh, and the horrible truth had hit her harder than she thought it would. Because everything she used to know, everything she _thought_ she knew, was crumbling into itty bitty pieces. It had all come crashing down on her before she even knew it.

_That_ was why she couldn't stand how Tam was avoiding her questioning. She had learnt from experience that, when someone was refusing to answer any of her questions, it meant bad news. And she didn't like bad news.

What an understatement.

Tam might be the only good thing left in her world. She wouldn't let him go. No, she would hold on the tightest she could. But Tam was stronger than her. He could easily slip out of her grasp if he wanted to.

Linh took a deep breath, feeling the ancientness of the place settle down around her. She also felt her emotions settle down, and they remained dormant as she turned away from Tam, hot tears welling up in her eyes as she whispered, "My mother dismissed all my questions, and now she's fully turned her back on me. You're the only one I have left, now. _Please._ I need to know."

Playing the emotion card was a dirty trick, but it was better than annoying Tam and turning his back on her, like how Mai had done two months ago—and honestly, Linh knew she was past the point of no return now.

She didn't dare to turn around and face Tam, so she couldn't see his expression as he said slowly, "You…you really want to know?"

His voice held all the things Linh expected it to hold. Hesitance. Surprise. Suspicion. Wariness. That meant he was relenting to her. Linh stifled her sigh of relief—there was still more work to do, more things to say to ease him out of his shell.

"No one satisfies my yearning for the answers to my questions," she replied in a nonchalant voice. "So I won't be shocked if you still refuse to even speak a word of it. After all, I'm used to it."

_After all, I'm used to it._

She was challenging him to be different, to break the mould and actually tell her _something._ And she knew Tam would never back down from that kind of challenge.

Linh turned back and looked at him, fiddling with her bracelet.

Tam brushed the jet-black bangs out of his eyes, and interlocked gazes with Linh. He blinked his eyes—his palest-of-pale-blue eyes with flecks of silver, much like Linh's—and opened his mouth to speak.

Linh took a careful step toward him, bracing herself for the truth to come forth from his lips.

She didn't expect him to ask her, "Can I trust you?"

_What kind of question is that? You don't trust me?_

Of course he shouldn't. Linh had instantly treated Tam as the enemy when she had first found out about him. And she was nothing but selfish. A selfish girl who couldn't forgive her mother for a petty thing she had done. A selfish girl who didn't feel like sharing anything with her twin. A selfish girl who didn't like the idea of twins. Why should he trust her?

And yet, she remembered the two-year old girl she had once been. The girl who loved her mother to the moon and back. The girl who prided herself in using her brain to help others. The girl who could accept any mindset as long as she thought enough about it. The girl who didn't really care about anything, much less examination results. The girl who would stand up against what was clearly wrong. Tam would have loved that girl. He would have trusted her completely.

And Linh had to admit that she _wanted_ to become that girl once again.

She might be broken beyond repair, but she could still be beautiful.

Like the name of the garden they were in, she was a beautiful broken thing, and she fully belonged here.

She believed Tam did, too.

So she said to Tam, "Of course you can trust me."

Tam stared at her for so long, Linh started to feel uncomfortable. She tried to distract herself with happy thoughts, blissful thoughts. Laughter acted as the sound effects, resonating through her head and clearing her mind. She felt a whisper of a smile tug at the corner of her lips as the stone in her heart lifted slightly.

But it all came crashing down on her once again when Tam finally said, "Before we returned to the Lost Cities…we were staying in the Neutral Territories."


	4. age of the ocean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> moANA

"The Neutral Territories?" repeated Linh, not sure how to reply to Tam's confession. She thought she'd prepared herself for any truth that might have come, but this was a totally new otherworld.

She didn't know much about the Neutral Territories, as it wasn't inhabited by elves. However, she was a huge advocate of the geographical studies of Earth, so naturally Linh felt a little guilty not reading more into the territories where other intelligent species, mainly gnomes, thrived. So why would Tam and his father—who, clearly, weren't gnomes, stay there?

Linh made a mental note to gather some books concerning the Neutral Territories from the library.

Tam nodded. "Specifically, we were staying in the Wildwood Colony."

"The Wildwood Colony," she echoed, not missing the way she sounded like a dumb person who only knew how to repeat what other people said. And she _felt_ like one right now.

She didn't think the elves focused much of their attention onto the other intelligent species' lives. The gnomes were just servants to them, and some elves like Lord Cassius probably looked down on them. And she was ashamed to admit that she hadn't thought much about their wellbeing, either.

"Where _is_ the Wildwood Colony?" she asked, hating how unknowledgeable she sounded. Linh prided herself for her wide collection of information, and her insatiable thirst for further knowledge. But she was just another normal elf now, learning something new and foreign to her.

How could she top the Foxfire entrance examinations like that? Even if Foxfire didn't focus on the Wildwood Colony in multispeciesial studies, it was still important, and indirectly connected to her—Tam had lived there for a solid two years. His life must have been vastly different from what they were experiencing now in Choralmere.

There was another important question deep inside her mind, but she pushed it aside for the meantime. She needed to know all the background information first, before she could make further inferences or conclusions.

Tam stared at the ivy vines crawling against the stone walls, running his fingers across the shining gold seams. They glimmered as bright as Choralmere in the stark artificial light, reflecting against his pale, cream-coloured complexion. Linh got the feeling he was avoiding her eyes, but she didn't make any move to object as she listened to him. "The Wildwood Colony is like the main residential area for the gnomes. The colony houses the biggest population of gnomes, and it's kind of close to Serenvale—before you ask me what Serenvale is, it's the former homeland to all gnomes, before it got taken over by the ogres and became Ravagog, the ogre capital."

"The ogre ca—" Before Linh could finish her sentence, she stopped herself. She didn't need to repeat everything that Tam was saying. Instead, she swallowed the lump in her throat and twisted her shaky fingers together, hoping it would help herself calm down. "So how did you and Father end up there? Are you…banished, or something?"

When a young elf committed an unforgivable crime, they were usually banished to the Neutral Territories. If that was the case, that could only apply to Tam. She wondered what Quan had done. This didn't clear up everything, like Linh thought it would. Instead, it just left all her questions unanswered and made more questions surface.

When Tam remained stubbornly silent, Linh prodded, "Please—I need to know. You haven't actually answered anything!"

The helplessness in her voice showed through, and her voice hitched on the last word. Tam finally turned and looked at her, his expression completely unreadable. As endless seconds passed, the two twins just stared into each other's identical eyes, not sure what to say to break the silence that had settled into the atmosphere.

Surprisingly, Tam was the first one to shatter the silence, and he opened his mouth to speak. When the words fell out his lips, Linh had to strain her ears to catch the softer-than-a-whisper words.

"I was an unruly boy at birth."

 _No kidding,_ Linh felt like saying, but she knew Tam was dead serious this time. So she kept quiet, focusing her eyes on Tam's hair and resisting the strange urge to sweep his bangs out of his eyes. She wondered if that made him uncomfortable at all. She knew it would, if she was him.

"I was disorderly, rowdy, wild, and unmanageable—for some reason. I didn't really think much at all. It was kind of my second nature to act that way, and I kept wandering around in the house and breaking fragile things, tearing off the curtains, and more. If I'm not wrong, the house I was in last time is none other than Choralmere." He nodded at their surroundings, and Linh felt a chill run down her spine.

So this wasn't Tam's first time in Choralmere.

Then something hit her like a bullet train. "Wait. Was I there with you, too?" she asked, her voice hoarse as her mind tried to strangle out the truth from the wild flurry of new information. But thankfully Tam saved her from her headache by explaining further.

"Yes, I remember you completely," he said, and Linh gasped at the new revelation. "We were together when we were born, and I think we stayed that way for a few weeks, before…I did this."

He stared at her for a long second, before Linh grew confused and asked, "What did you do?"

"Your scar healed completely," said Tam, in a sad voice Linh had never heard him use before. Then it became clear to her that Tam wasn't staring at _her_ , but rather, he was staring at her _forehead_ , where there must have been a wound when he had injured her. "I was really sorry—and I _still_ am, remember that. But one of the Councillors—I can't remember which one it was—was seriously freaked out, and he sentenced me to a Tribunal. And apparently, my mother had had enough of it as well. It probably was because she loves you a lot—"

"Not anymore," said Linh coolly. But inside, she was conflicted. She felt happy that her mother had stood up to her—but…she also felt really, _really_ angry that her mother had been the one to seal the deal, and banish Tam from the Lost Cities—Tam, only a mere few- _weeks_ -old elf at that time.

He wouldn't have survived at all.

What in the world was wrong with Mai Song?

"It doesn't really matter now," said Tam. "Anyway, since our mum was _kind_ enough to demand that I be kicked out of the world of elfkind, I was forcibly removed from the Lost Cities. But…before that, my father…he actually _stood up_ , against the whole Council, and his wife, to declare that he will be going with me. To the Neutral Territories."

"He…did?" asked Linh in disbelief. She tried to picture haughty, stately Quan Song, standing up for his son and demanding he be banished with him as well. Nope, she couldn't see it.

So _that_ was why Quan and Tam were in the Neutral Territories, before her mother found them.

Linh was starting to see a different side of her father, and she wondered where that side had disappeared to, when he had returned to the Lost Cities.

"Yes, he did," said Tam. "Hardly the person we're envisioning right now, am I right? I don't know where that brave, heroic father figure went, but…yeah."

_That's another thing we have in common. We're both wondering where that person we used to know went._

"But…I thought banishment was mostly permanent—unless you earn your way back?" asked Linh. "So how did you come back? Just…an honest question I'm asking here."

Tam pointed at himself. "I promised to change for the better, right in front of the Council, before we were banished away. And our mum apparently took that as a sign to try and take us back. She's tried for two years and a little more than that. And she's finally succeeded. The Council gave in, because I was probably the youngest person to ever be banished. I'm such a bad role model to you, by the way."

"You're good enough," said Linh, finally letting out a smile. It eased her nerves a whole lot.

Tam—for some reason—wouldn't meet her eyes, and when Linh nudged his shoulder gently, he whispered, "Are…you mad at me?"

Linh blinked at him. "Why would I be mad?"

"I hurt you."

She blinked again, this time in understanding. "Oh, _that._ Don't worry, I'm not mad at you. I just—I don't even remember anything about you. But why—"

 _Yeah, why? Why didn't I remember Tam at all? Why was I surprised when Aunt Cadence told me that I had a twin brother? Even if it was for a mere few weeks, shouldn't I have remembered_ something? _Especially when he had injured me, and when_ I _was the reason he got banished?_

"My…memory," she croaked out, suddenly feeling uneasy. "They erased my memory…didn't they?"

_Washers. The Washers erased my memories of Tam._

To confirm the horrifying theory, Tam nodded sadly. "Everyone thought that all that happened would cause you emotional trauma, and they predicted it wouldn't bode well as you grew up, to remember a long-lost sibling that had done nothing but hurt you, and disappeared, never to be seen again. So they proposed your memory be erased.

"So when we met again—for the first time in forever—two months before, I wasn't surprised you didn't remember me. And it seemed well enough to make you think we were separated at birth. Anyway, if you remembered me, I was completely sure that you would _hate_ me. It was better to start afresh, work for redemption with a blank slate. I promised myself, that for you, I would try to turn over a new leaf."

Linh was speechless—she didn't know what to say to the information overload that was threatening to combust in her mind. So when her words and her mind failed her, her first instinct was to bound forward and wrap her twin brother in a big, tight hug.

Tam was surprised at first, his arms falling limp at his sides and whole body stiffening, but after a while, he relaxed and returned the embrace. In Tam's arms, Linh felt the safest and happiest she had ever felt in the span of two months.

That made her feel guilty that all she'd been thinking of was beating Tam in their studies. So she decided to treat him better, and actually treat him like a real person as they pulled away from each other's arms.

"Thank you, Tam," she said. "I forgive you. And…I'm sorry too."

Tam frowned in confusion, not comprehending why she felt the need to apologise to him. "Why are you sorry?"

Linh turned away from him for a few long seconds, collecting herself before turning back again and flashing a smile at him.

The gold streaks in the stone wall reflected into her eyes and turned the silver flecks in her eyes golden.

A beautiful, broken thing.

Fixed with gold and turned a doll.

"Just…felt like saying it. Come on, our parents must be searching for us by now."

"They were already, like, half an hour ago," muttered Tam, but he said nothing else as he followed his twin sister out of the indoor garden. Linh snapped her fingers before Tam closed the door, and the garden instantly blinked out of existence, fading into the darkness.

The gold in Tam and Linh's eyes reverted back to its silvery state, turning them back into two lost, helpless little children, trying to find their way back to their parents.

And two lost, helpless little children they would continue to be for many years to come.

* * *

"Where _were_ you?" Mai practically screeched, when she caught sight of the two Song children, stumbling down the steps of the grand staircase. Her face was livid-looking, and Tam slightly nudged Linh to show his discreet amusement. Linh didn't nudge back. She was kind of scared to see her mother so…angry.

Before Tam could reply, Linh stretched her hand out, silencing him. She turned back to look at him, before mouthing the four words _leave this to me_. She whirled back and locked eyes with Mai. Mai blinked at her outright intrusion, but didn't say anything to interrupt as Tam said, "Linh, tell her where we were."

Good that he was playing along.

Linh tried to hide her smile—a nearly impossible feat, as she said with a straight face, "We were hiding behind the bedroom door. I taught Tam to do it."

"Never thought she would use the same trick two times, did you?" Tam asked. He didn't say it in a cheeky way, but it was clear that the insult in the words was directed at their mother.

If it was possible, Mai's face turned even redder, and there was a slight murderous look on her face as she called, "Quan, if you please!"

"Great," muttered Tam under his breath.

In a few seconds, the spiral staircase behind them whirred to life and revealed their father. His clothes were slightly bedraggled as he widened his eyes at Tam and Linh. He looked like he had been tearing down the whole place to find them. Remembering what Tam had told her about their father, Linh watched him carefully as he rushed forward to pull the two of them in a warm embrace. But it didn't feel warm. It felt cold, somehow.

But…that proved that Quan _did_ actually care about Tam. And…maybe her, as well.

She dared not hope.

"I was so worried about you," Quan said. _"We_ were so worried about you."

It was the most vulnerable version of Quan that Linh had seen. She blinked as he released the two of them from his grip, and smoothed down her cape, where Quan had messed it up during the hug. She turned back abruptly to face Mai, remembering that she hadn't joined in the family embrace.

She looked oddly out of place and a little flustered as she said, "It's late—but you must be hungry after you two—ran—away. I'll go and ask the gnomes to prepare something for late night supper." With that, she spun on her heel and vanished out of sight.

Linh let out a small gasp when she noticed how dark it was outside. The midnight blue sky seemed to stretch on forever and forever, but a crescent-shaped moon hung big and tall over the mansion. The soft moonlight and starlight hit the reflective surfaces of Choralmere, further illuminating the dark. But even with that, the night seemed terrifyingly suffocating. The formerly bright blue ocean was now a dark cyan blue, almost unseen to Linh's eyes.

"Where were you two?" asked their father, severing Linh's string of attention to the scenery and forcing her to look back at his pale face. Suddenly, she could see the striking resemblance among the three of them, and a chill ran down her spine, almost causing her to shudder.

"We were hiding behind the bedroom door," said Tam. "To be more specific, Linh's bedroom door."

"Please don't do that," snapped Quan, causing Linh to jump. Tam remained stoic, like he was already used to his sudden outbursts. "You two caused us so much worry. And…Tam and Linh, if you two continue to deny our declarations of your respective ages, you will face the consequences."

His voice turned slightly cold, and Linh shivered.

"Understood and reciprocated," she said. To her surprise, Tam remained silent, and even when she nudged him, he refused to budge.

Quan sighed. "Tam, we have spoken about this before."

Linh turned her back on Quan, so he couldn't see her mouth to Tam, _do it for me—please._

A few seconds slipped by before Tam finally opened his mouth to speak. "Fine, Father. But let this be known to you—we are not doing this for you."

"Even Linh?" he asked.

"Even me," Linh agreed.

Quan's mouth formed a word, but he stopped when Mai returned, with a round plate in hand. Linh tried to peer at the things on the plate, but she was too short to see.

Mai closed her slender fingers onto something on the plate, and offered it to Quan. Linh stared at the small puff, watching as Quan murmured a word of thanks to Mai and popped it into his mouth.

He smiled—the first time Linh had ever seen him smile. "You actually remember that my favourite kind of custard bursts is the ones with chocolate inside."

"Of course I did," said Mai, a smile gracing her lips as well. Linh stared at her. "I didn't forget you, did I?"

"You didn't," he agreed.

Without context, Linh would have been confused. But now, thanks to Tam, she knew that they were talking about the past, when Quan had followed Tam into banishment.

Mai obviously didn't forget Quan—or Tam, in that case. She had begged the Council so many times to allow her to go to the Neutral Territories to bring them back. And now, they were back. She didn't forget them at all.

But Linh felt that while Mai had gotten back her husband and her son, she had forgotten all about her daughter.

She was the last to be passed the plate of custard bursts—unsurprisingly—and when Linh bit into the papery skin, chocolaty cream exploded in her mouth, filling her mouth with thick sweetness. But soon it turned sour with her emotions, and Linh tried to hold her tears in as she watched Mai bend down to offer Tam a second custard burst.

Their synchronized laughter felt like little needles pressing down into her heart, and a tear streaked down Linh's cheek.

_I thought Tam hated her._

She brushed the wetness away from her cheek quickly before anyone saw. And she didn't dare to speak. She didn't dare to ask for a second custard burst. She just turned away to gaze at the view outside for the second time, and her eyes fell upon the sea again.

In a way, she was like the ocean surrounding Choralmere at night. Dark and silent, almost unseen, and already forgotten.

She thought she could control herself to become another person, but the pull to become who she was before was staggering. Maybe that was how a Hydrokinetic felt like when they were trying to control the ocean. They wanted to have full control of the water, but the pull of the water was stronger than they were and it refused to abide by the Hydrokinetic.

 _You asked for this,_ the ocean seemed to whisper. _You asked for this._

_Why do I feel so lonely? Why must it be this way?_

_You are destined to be different,_ the ocean whispered again. _You are destined to be special._

Linh didn't feel as special as the ocean thought her out to be. She turned away from the window, tears in her eyes, then paused abruptly when she realised everyone had stopped to stare at her. Quan and Mai looked especially afraid, their faces pale and their eyes unfocused.

"What were you doing?" asked Tam.

She knew it would sound strange to say that the ocean seemed to be speaking to her, but nevertheless, she blinked her eyes and turned back for a while to stare at the ocean again. Then she faced her family again, not sure what to say. But her mind—her oh-so-clever mind, formed the words she felt she needed to say out loud. And they were simple.

She knew what this could mean, but somehow, she wasn't afraid at all.

"The ocean," she said. "It's calling me."


	5. balefire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Ah, right," Tam said, "the books. Sorry, I was confused for a second. I agree with you, but how are we going to find out if our reading periods don't clash with other things? How are we going to know if there's going to be dinners with guests like today, or when we are going to go outdoors?"
> 
> Linh smiled, and winked at him. "Exactly. We don't have to find out when other elves visit Choralmere to eat dinner with us. When they do, all we have to do is cause a distraction by telling the visitors our real age like we did today, and run off to the library. Piece of mallowmelt."
> 
> Tam gaped at her for a long second, before he recovered and told Linh, "Has anyone ever told you that you're pretty clever?"
> 
> "No," Linh lied through her teeth. "You're the first."

Linh cast a last longing look at the full-length window before Mai escorted her back to her bedroom. She was about to shut the door closed, when she hesitated for a moment, then said, "Don't hide behind the door again, Linh."

Linh couldn't tell if that was a joke or not. But if Mai had wanted her to be guilty about hiding behind her bedroom door, well, she wasn't at all moved by her words. So she inclined her head slightly and turned her eyes to the wall as Mai slowly closed the door, making the bright light from outside wink out and enclose her bedroom in total darkness.

Linh closed her eyes and concentrated on Mai's fading footsteps, counting each and every footfall, until the rhythmic sound was completely replaced by grim silence. Linh opened her eyes again and frowned at her shadowy reflection through the ornate mirror that had been attached to the side of her gigantic wardrobe, which looked like it'd been dipped in titanium and then sprayed with some sort of glossy varnish.

But in the darkness, its display factors completely fell short as there was little light reflecting on its surface for it to shine. Linh thought the wardrobe was exactly like her-wanting to shine but being given no chance to.

Wearily, she snapped her fingers, flooding the room with light and bringing everything back to life. The wallpaper, which had been scattered with little flecks of golden glitter here and there, glowed in the bright light, like an elf slowly stirring awake from his sleep. The wardrobe shimmered and sparkled as she turned her head to look at it in specific angles, gazing at it in wonder as her clever mind tried to work the reason out. The light cut through the translucent curtains masking her canopy bed, making a blurry outline of the pillows she had slept with visible to her eyes.

And Linh? Linh felt like there was renewed energy rushing back into her heart while her heart pumped that energy into every nook and cranny of her body as she danced around the room, trying to memorise every unremarkable feature of the room she would be staying in for as long as she could imagine. But she knew that she wouldn't be here forever. And that thought motivated her to make the best use of this room and feel better than she had been known to feel.

Slowly, gently, Linh dragged the long, draping curtains covering the view outside and peered out at the amazing view. It was like someone had flipped a switch, and the previously pitch-black Choralmere had been replaced with light, glitter, and more light. Lanterns the colour of red lined the little tributaries, lighting up the water as it flowed into the main river stream and then into the great ocean. The crescent-shaped balcony was lighted up, hanging over the sky like a second moon. Sparks of balefire tucked away in the crystal walls made the whole place shimmer.

And the ocean, the _ocean._ Linh thought she would never tear her eyes away from the breathtaking sight as she stared out at the frothy waves, as they pulsed forward and broke away just at the shoreline. The light of Choralmere barely reached the first tides, but once again Linh felt the call of the ocean, like a breathy whisper trying to tug her closer. Soon her face was squished on the glass, like she needed to get as close as she could to the water. The lull in the tide was like her breathing, rising and falling in a rhythmic beat. The ocean was her life, her life was the ocean-

_Snap out of it snap out of it snap out of it._

All of a sudden, a niggling voice in the back of her mind snapped Linh out of her reverie, and she stumbled back, knocking into the foot of her bed. Feeling her breath tremble and wobble, she took slow, deep breaths in an attempt to calm herself down. Then, gingerly, she peered out again, pointedly doing her best to tear her attention away from the water as she narrowed her eyes at the windows which had been lighted up.

With amazing ease, Linh's mind mapped out a path of Choralmere's interior, and with the minimal knowledge she had of her new residencial area, she made up her mind and opened her door with just a quiet creak, and slipped out into the dimmed corridors. She winded down the halls, and made her way back to the staircase. She whispered, "Eleven", and the Vortinator whisked her up. Once again, it felt like she had already become accustomed to it. Like she had won and lost at the same time.

Her efforts for her plan of acting as the good girl had paid off, but meanwhile, she sensed a feeling of loss by giving in to her parents.

Maybe pretending to be someone else wasn't a good idea.

And that was why Linh was now tiptoeing to the third room to the left of the eleventh floor corridor.

She knew that Tam was in this room—simply because the bracelet on her wrist Lady Iskra had given her grew brighter and brighter as she neared the room.

Without a moment's hesitation, she raised her fisted hand to knock on the smooth mahogany. Thankfully, the door wasn't hollow, so the three consecutive knocks weren't that loud, but still clear enough for the person inside the room to hear her. Linh counted the passing seconds as she stood before the entrance to the room in complete silence, while another part of her mind which wasn't doing any counting drifted off as she brooded on all of her problems. Quan and Mai and Tam. Tam and Mai and Quan. Everything Linh worried about was her family.

To Linh, her family was nothing but a burden. The word _family_ used to mean a lot more to her a long, long time ago, but that was just a long, long time ago.

She had been left all behind by her mother, that backstabber. That woman who had once meant everything to Linh, who blindly trusted her and confided in her, thinking that she also meant everything to her. But Mai Song had done nothing but feed her life a huge bunch of untruths and betrayed her for her husband and her son. She, with her father, now liked to tell white lies about her age. And even if Linh didn't mind them lying about her age, why did they decide to make her the 'second child'?

Obviously Tam was the more favoured one, the one they thought more talented, because in elvin belief, the first child was always the best one. Everyone who came after the first child was counted inferior to them.

Tam was all right, but Linh _still_ couldn't stand the way he was so smart and clever and how he was able to see right through her. It was true they were twins, but they'd only known each other for less than a year. It was unbelievable that he could read so much into people. It was like he had an unspeakable talent for reading other people's potential or intentions. Who knew? Maybe he was going to become a Descryer, like Councillor Terik, or maybe… a Shade, _just like their mother._

Unknowingly, Linh had curled her hands into tight fists, and was only snapped out of her angry thoughts when her nails bit sharp into the flesh of her palms, the pain blasting her back to reality. She hadn't noticed someone slotting his eye into the keyhole of the door, watching her solemnly and silently, and nor did she notice the subtle way he moved out of sight and made up his mind.

Shaking, she realised that ninety three seconds had already slipped by just like that and nobody had answered the door yet. Linh was about to turn and leave when the door clicked open softly, swinging inwards a crack as a tiny portion of a pale blue eye peeked out, staring straight at her.

"Come on in," said Tam quietly, widening the opening of the door to let Linh's little form slip into his bedroom. Linh curled a strand of flyaway hair behind her ear nervously as her bare feet stepped on the floor mat of Tam's bedroom, taking in her surroundings with bittersweetness.

Tam's bedroom was clearly much more extravagant than hers, which was something she didn't mind in general, but when it came to jealousy, her face contorted into a disturbed frown as her eyes scanned the shining cobalt blue walls, the king sized canopy bed, the crescent-shaped loveseat, and the study desk. Linh didn't have the love seat and the study desk, and her bed was queen-sized.

Now she knew for sure that her parents thought it was going to be Tam who would succeed in the Lost Cities. But her parents didn't know her at all.

Well, her mother _did_ know that Linh loved to puzzle things out, but she didn't care about Linh anymore.

She might have given up on her plan to pretend to be someone else, but she had not given up on her plan to top all the young elves running to enter Foxfire and get the first in standard. And she was going to beat Tam as well, no matter how smart her twin brother could get.

"Why did you come to see me, Linh?" asked Tam, motioning her to sit beside her on the midnight black loveseat. Linh folded her skirt and gracefully took her seat on the soft cushions. She was already so accustomed to the multiple etiquette lessons Mai had lectured her on, and was so used to being under constant watch for her table manners that she had just did it out of habit.

She tugged on the ends of her hair in a fidgety way—that seemed to have become her nervous habit and a constant addiction—as she rehearsed through what she had to say for the final time. Then she opened her mouth and said, "We need to figure out a schedule for our reading periods."

Tam furrowed his eyebrows together in confusion and tilted his head slightly to one side, staring at her blankly. "What do you mean by our reading periods?"

She couldn't believe he'd forgotten. She thought he was actually passionate about reading. But she tried to shake her hurt away—anyway, he could have forgotten simply because of the excitement of the long day. After all, this was only their first day at Choralmere, and yet so much had already happened.

"The library," she said irritatingly, but made careful measures to lower the volume of her voice as she continued, more calmly this time, "Remember the secret garden that we'd found? And when I suggested we take books from the library there to read in private? We need to set up a time to go there to read which doesn't clash with any other things we have to do—which should be simpler than you think."

"Ah, right," Tam said, "the books. Sorry, I was confused for a second. I agree with you, but how are we going to find out if our reading periods don't clash with other things? How are we going to know if there's going to be dinners with guests like today, or when we are going to go outdoors?"

Linh smiled, and winked at him. "Exactly. We _don't_ have to find out when other elves visit Choralmere to eat dinner with us. When they _do_ , all we have to do is cause a distraction by telling the visitors our real age like we did today, and run off to the library. Piece of mallowmelt."

Tam gaped at her for a long second, before he recovered and told Linh, "Has anyone ever told you that you're pretty clever?"

"No," Linh lied through her teeth. "You're the first."

* * *

"It might be that I'm crazy, but I genuinely think this is going to work," whispered Tam as they stood behind Linh's bedroom door, their ears finally picking up the obvious sound of Mai's footsteps nearing them.

Linh shushed him, putting a finger against his lips as she tiptoed, peering through the keyhole. Two seconds later and she could see a tiny portion of Mai's impossibly high heels clicking against the marble floor. Giving a subtle nod to Tam, Linh scuttled out of the doorway and lay on the bed, facing the wall to distract herself as Tam plastered himself more firmly against the wall, trying to press himself as flat as possible. Five seconds later, Mai could be heard stopping right in front of Linh's door. The door clicked from the outside, and she walked inside, leaving the door open and Tam hidden.

"Linh?" she asked as she approached Linh's lying figure on the bed. Drawing the curtains of the canopy bed, she watched as Linh turned towards Mai's direction and sat up leisurely, giving off a yawn to make it seem realer. Her hand rested idly on her wrist, but in truth it was actually to obscure the light of the bracelet, so that it wouldn't give away the truth that Tam was nearby.

"Linh, dinner is ready. We have guests coming in a minute as well, like I've already told you a day before. I had hoped you were already prepared, but obviously you are not. I'm very ashamed of you. Go put your evening gown on now."

Linh bristled at the phrase "I'm very ashamed of you" and nodded quietly, her stomach filled with bubbly, boiling rage-fire. She slid out of bed, opened her silver wardrobe, and yanked out a glittering, ankle-length gown, and a dark-coloured cape with the glimmering Song crest. She felt like she wanted to hurl her family crest into the fire and let it burn, but Mai was watching, so she just laid the clothes on her bed with careful gentleness as Mai stalked out of her room, slamming the door behind her, leaving nothing in her wake but complete silence.

After Mai's footsteps had faded into nothing, Tam slid out from his hiding place behind the door. Linh hadn't even noticed him hiding. Maybe it was because she was so blinded by her anger at her mother, or maybe it was the way he seemed to naturally fade into the shadows. Whatever it was, Linh didn't care about that right now. The words her mother had spoken kept on repeating over and over in her head like a broken record, giving her a migraine as she tried to smother the words out.

_I'm very ashamed of you._

Linh sighed as Tam said, "Well, that went better than expected. I was half-expecting her to look behind the door, since y'know, she already knows you can hide behind the door."

 _Oh, but dear brother, does she expect_ you _to do such frivolous and insensible things? Does she think you to be someone like me? No, all her hopes for a better future are lying with_ you. _Why would she even think you'd do something like hide from her?_

But all Linh said out loud was, "Don't open the wardrobe. I'm going in to change now."

* * *

"Mr. Pyren, this is Tam Song, and Linh Song. Tam and Linh, this is Mr. Pyren," said Quan stiffly as he gestured to each of the parties.

Linh bowed slightly, like she'd been instructed to do this time—though there was obviously something amiss with this Mr. Pyren.

For one, she'd never heard someone address another elf as only _Mister_ before. Linh was so used to hearing _Lord_ and _Lady_ that when she was told that this handsome elf that stood before her was only to be called a _Mister._

Also, when Lady Iskra, Lord Cassius, and Lord Finnian visited two days ago, Tam and Linh were clearly ordered to greet them in the traditional way, which symbolised the most respect out of any other greetings. So why did this elf ought to be treated any differently?

Linh didn't like the unsettling way Mr. Pyren gazed at Tam and her, like he was trying to dig out their deepest secrets for his own use. Maybe _that_ was why he was being treated a lesser way—for being a _major creep._

"It's nice to meet you, Lord Quan and Lady Mai," Mr. Pyren said with a curling smile. Linh directed her eyes away from his blue eyes, trying to look at anywhere but _his eyes._ "It's nice to meet you as well, Tam and Linh. I see the Song family has finally reunited. I see two promising young elves over here. Any future prospects for either of them yet?"

Linh kept her face straight as Quan said ambiguously, "Tam and Linh are doing well. Thank you for asking, Mr. Pyren, but I do not need an elf of much lesser status than the prestigious Song family to pry into our business. Now… Mai, if you please?"

Mai looked like she wanted to bolt out of here any second, but she nodded and snapped her fingers, conjuring up a feast smaller than the one she'd cooked up when Lord Cassius and the others had visited. Linh guessed it was because of the lessened number of people, but she also had a niggling feeling that it was because of Mr. Pyren's lesser status, whatever that meant. But no matter what it was, Linh could see that Mr. Pyren's face had darkened quite a few shades.

Inwardly, she shuddered.

"I would like to remind you, Lord Quan," said Mr. Pyren coldly, "that you are speaking to a former member of the Council—and quite an important one at that." Tam and Linh gasped in unison, and Mr. Pyren smiled at that. "I'm thankful that at least your children have better sense of humility than you," he added.

 _He_ had been a member of the Council? Was that honestly the same Mr. Pyren they were talking about?

"The key word here, Former Councillor Fintan Pyren, is _former._ You have been deemed Talentless and no longer hold any higher authority over me. Dangerous Pyrokinetics such as you should be thrown in Exile. I'm surprised the Councillors have not done so yet. I'm assuming they still hold some sort of sentiment toward you, which they should not."

"Quan," warned Mai, but her husband shot her down.

"I am the one who rules over the Song family. You have no power to control me, Mai."

Mai paled, and for the first time in forever, Linh felt a pang of anger toward her father for mistreating her mother.

From across the dining table, the elf with the first name of Fintan clicked his tongue in disapproval. "Well, well. What do we have here? A man who holds more arrogance than a Councillor. A man who thinks he is the greatest Keeper of the _millennia_ -old Choralmere. I have lived two thousand years on this planet and believe me when I say that Maeluang Song was the only one who had 'common sense' in her vocabulary. I'm afraid you, Quan Song, are lacking of exactly that."

"Maeluang Song had always been scorned by my grandfather," Quan said through gritted teeth. "He said she was always acting too much and thinking too little. She has everything but common sense. Whereas I can say different things about myself."

Linh's head felt nothing but a mess right now. It had never occurred to her to ask for the names of Choralmere's past inheritors, much less their strengths and flaws. But then again, she had only learned of the Song legacy a few days ago.

"Oh, don't you think you're just the perfect epitome of greatness?" laughed Fintan, his past anger now completely replaced by amusement. There was a gleam in his eye as he continued, "After all, I'm sure you still mourn your dearest brother after his unfortunate… _accident_. You two were very close, given the fact that both of you were Hydrokinetics, and _yet_ your brother, the first child, died after falling off when your parents announced that they plan to pass Choralmere over to him and his family. After his death, everything was automatically passed over to you, including his fiancee Mai Yin, with whom you apparently found true love. "

Tam and Linh gave a collective gasp for the second time, while Mai just turned as pale as the moon hanging outside the slowly darkening sky.

 _What does this possibly mean?_ Linh thought, her heartbeat picking up at lightning speed. _Of what is Fintan accusing my father? But that aside, if Mai doesn't even like Quan at all, why did they even get together? Could this mean there is corruption involved in the Song family? But how? Why?_

"Dad," said Tam quietly, staring straight at his father, who was visibly shaking. "Is what he's saying true?"

A fleeting look of hesitation flashed across Quan's face, before it vanished and Quan brushed off the accusing question, saying, "Of course not, son. Do you not trust me?"

"We can't trust you if you really did it," Linh piped up, her feelings a humongous hurricane of fury and confusion. "A former Councillor can't be making this up, can he? But then again, how in the Lost Cities can you do all that without shattering your sanity? How can you not feel guilty at all?"

The minds of elves were prone to the feeling of guilt, and would often break and shatter if the weight of their guilt weighing down on them was too much for them to handle. If what Fintan was saying was true, then how did her father break all fundamental rules, while escaping scot-free?

"Enough, Fintan." Linh jumped in shock as Mai rose from her seat, her hands slamming on the dining table hard enough to make their glasses shake. There was a hard, dangerous look in her eyes Linh had never seen before, and she looked absolutely menacing as she drew every shadow she could find in the room to her side, morphing and shaping the shadows to make it resemble a large, sharp-pointed arrow as she directed it at the former Councillor. The candlelights winked out one by one, sending the dining room into darkness. "You will leave Choralmere immediately and never to come back. If you hurt Linh or Tam or—"

Fintan let out a sharp laugh. "Your Shade tricks aren't going to defeat a powerful Pyrokinetic like me. Fine, I'll leave Choralmere alone—for _now_. Oh, and isn't it funny how you said Linh's name first, when Tam is obviously the older one? It's almost as if the Songs already know who the next Hydrokinetic is going to be…" He glanced slyly at Linh, making a chill run down her spine.

Fintan was a _Pyrokinetic?_

No… no wonder he was banished from the Council.

Quan was still trembling slightly as he buried his face in his hands. Mai glanced at him for a split second before she glared at Fintan once again. "Get. Out. _Now."_

Fintan only smiled at Mai as he walked out of the dining room, his loud footsteps ringing out in the scary silence, the extinguished candlelights reigniting by themselves, flooding the room with brightness. Only this time, the candlelights shone a unnaturally bright blue, like it had just shone through the Song family's dirty secrets.

That night, Tam and Linh were too troubled to go to the library.


	6. yin and yang

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Apologies. I shall not keep you in wait any longer. I… usually don't conduct any descrying sessions anymore due to the overwhelming demand, but you know that I can always make exceptions for the children of one of our most talented Emissaries."

Surprisingly, the happenings of that fateful night had soon became forgotten to the four members of the Song family. Three years had passed since Fintan Pyren visited Choralmere, and now the song in Linh's heart was a different one.

Now a six-year old with a healthy blush in her cheeks, Linh Song set off confidently to the secret garden in the library with her twin brother, Tam Song. They were now allowed to explore around Choralmere as they please, as it became apparent that most things changed when they grew older—although, some things would stay the same—such as Quan's constant coldness toward them, Mai's occasional neglectance toward Linh, and Tam and Linh's bitterness directed at both of their parents.

And of course, there was the infamous untruth that Tam and Linh were just causing a nuisance and pretending to be twins. Since the mere age of three, Tam and Linh had told every elf that had ever stepped foot in Choralmere that they were twins, only to be separated at birth. Well, the only visitor that had never been personally told by them was Fintan Pyren, but the Fintan Pyren that had dinner with them had long been cast into Exile, to be long forgotten for millennia.

It was like he had become a ghost.

Despite that Tam and Linh's memories of Fintan had been completely Washed away from their minds, their parents, especially Quan Song, could still hear his raspy voice floating through their minds, warning them of an impending disaster.

 _I'll leave Choralmere alone—for_ now.

* * *

"Hey, Linh. Do you still remember the first book we ever read when we discovered this place?" asked six-year old Tam as he entered the secret garden with a book in tow. The gold seams crackling through the rocky wall shone and reflected into his eyes, turning the silver flecks in his eyes gold. His shoes stepped onto the fallen leaves on the grassy ground, making crunching sounds echo around the bright room, and stopped at the bottom a small uprun hill, on which a gallant tree stood proudly, its strong, thick branches fanning out, bearing lucid, star-shaped leaves and sprouting bluish-purplish-pink blossoms which seemed to shimmer in the light. But there was something strange about it Tam couldn't put his finger on. Although the tree looked completely magnificent and beautiful, it seemed a little too… unnatural, and looking at it made Tam's throat dry up with an indescribable feeling. It just felt… wrong.

Linh leaned on the bark of the tree, her legs crossed and her neck down-bending slightly to read the thick, hardback book she was holding in her hands. She flipped the page in about every fifteen seconds, and by the expression on her face, it was clear to Tam that she was concentrating hard to read the book.

She must have sensed that Tam had arrived, because she lifted her eyes from the pages of the book and locked her gaze with Tam's, her lips curling into a pleasant smile as she bookmarked the page she'd been reading with a dry leaf and set down her book. She beckoned Tam to come up with her, and Tam made his way up the small hill, plopping down beside her as they both leaned against the strong trunk of the tree. Tam thought the bark felt unreal against the touch of his fingers.

As if knowing what he was thinking, Linh sat up straighter and faced him, saying, "I don't think you know that we're touching an artificial tree."

" _An artificial tree?"_ Tam repeated, not quite understanding what she was trying to tell him, his mind running through the possibilities of what an artificial tree could do.

"Yes, an artificial tree," agreed Linh, tracing the spirally knot in the bark of the tree. She tucked a stray strand of jet-black hair behind her ear as she continued to explain, "This garden has been here for millennia, Tam. Thousands and thousands of years without needing any gardening, and what is the explanation for this? It must be that all the living things here _aren't_ actually living. The reason why they can thrive on forever without anything happening to them is because they're not _real._ They don't need anything, and they won't rot away because of the minimal number of living things coming in. They are stronger than the most Ancient of elves, Tam."

"Wow," said Tam, after a long, long moment of stunned silence. "Just… wow."

He didn't really know what to say to all of this. Authenticity had always been something he valued, and to know one of the most precious things he had in Choralmere was _fake_ , it was kind of a hard blow for him. Still, the concept of artificiality was intriguing, to say the least. How could something fake look so… well, _real?_

"That's why I like this garden so much," Linh said all of a sudden, a strange quality hidden in her voice that made the hairs on Tam's neck stand up. Fiddling with the jade bracelet clasped on her wrist, her eyes glimmered gold as she said, "You see, it's exactly like me."

* * *

Linh smiled as she closed the cover of the book she'd been reading and gazed around her bedroom—well, more like _their_ bedroom—marvelling how so many things could change in the short span of three years. Quan and Mai had made good on their punishment, and had forced Tam and Linh to share a room together—which wasn't much of a punishment to Linh but more of a blessing. Staying in the same room with Tam ensured that she would _never_ get lonely since Tam was always so sweet and caring when it came to Linh. He had sworn to take better care of her ever since he'd been banished because he had injured Linh, and Linh had sworn to do the same, as she still remembered when news of Tam first came to her through Aunt Cadence.

She had been so, so angry at that time. She thought that having a twin brother would mean burden to her life, and in a way, it did bring unhappiness to her life. But Linh had soon come to understand that Tam was not at fault, and ever since, she had stopped trying to plan to sabotage him and instead enjoy being with him, only saving and harbouring her disgust and anger for her parents, especially her mother.

Nothing came without a price. Tam might have had made her life a better place since he came along, but she had something taken away from her before that, and a very important thing at that.

Her _mother._

Linh closed her eyes before the tears could fall out. Focusing on her cool, collected rage, she turned each wave of grief and sadness into swirling tendrils of quiet fury, before she weaved each tendril into another, creating a trembling knot of combustible emotions writhing in her gut, ready to burst out at her very command. The current book she was reading was about telekinesis—it wasn't entitled a capital letter because it was a skill—considered inferior to a special ability—and Linh thought it was very interesting.

The book had taught her some interesting tips to better her telekinesis, but she was failing terribly at it. Well… physical education would be something in which she wouldn't excel when she entered Foxfire.

Nobody really thought it was important, though.

There were still four years to go before she would sit herself down in the Tribunal Hall, in front of twelve regal and strict elves who would be deciding her future. Whether she would end up in the elvin noble school as one of the most prestigious prodigies was _all up to them._

Luckily, her father had already picked up the exclusively important role in the nobility as an Emissary. And she knew just the Councillor to look for first.

* * *

Linh stared up at the twelve castles, with their monumental altitude and their glittering glory. A sense of intimidation overwhelmed her, and she nearly backed away from the staggering sight. But she thought of Tam getting in the spotlight and her being pushed away unfairly, and she clenched her fists until they turned white as sheet, trying to get a grip on herself.

She had dressed in a ankle-length evening silk gown, the drapey cobalt-blue fabric swirling gently with her movement. Her raven-black hair had been braided and spun into an elaborate updo, and silvery diamonds had been threaded across. Subtly complementing her palest-of-pale-blue eyes, with flecks of silver hidden behind the irises, the jewels in her hair glittered as bright as the Councillors' castles, as if daring them to match up with her.

After all, she was the heiress of the prestigious Song family. Destined to take glittering Choralmere as her own. Foreordained to be a talented Hydrokinetic, one who could command the rivers and the sea surrounding Choralmere so well she could call them her own.

She had no reason to fear the Councillors for their prominent superiority.

She might have been the girl who was carelessly cast aside by her mother, she might have been the girl who was shamed for being a twin, she might have been the girl who wasted her time cuddled into a corner deep into her book, but she was independent and she was clever and she would soon be powerful and wise.

Her mother would regret carelessly casting her aside. Everyone would regret shaming her for being a twin. Everyone would regret calling her the girl who wasted her time reading, because they would soon know an elf who read well beyond her age would be a puissant asset.

Sure, it was harder than it looked, Linh had to admit that. But she was tired of being hurt. She was tired of being shamed, and bullied for who she was. She was tired of being cast aside again and again. She had to fight back.

How could she make the Lost Cities a better place if she wasn't even being treated well by the Lost Cities?

As she took Tam's hand in hers and followed her mother and her father into one of the castles positioned more toward the center, Linh wondered what the Councillor would say about her. Would he say she had potential to be good? Or would he look hesitant and apologetic and stutter that he had never seen anyone have such potential to be lulled over to the dark side?

Linh honestly had no idea. She knew it was because both good and evil reminded her of herself. She had both _yin_ and _yang_ inside her. She had both the power to create… and the power to _destroy._

She had the sudden vision of thundering, colossal torrents of water rushing in on her from all sides, a crumbling jeweled building in the distance, the damage hardly heard over the deafening gush of the ocean pouring in through a broken force field. Her throat tightened in fear and a raspy gasp tore through her throat as she stood rooted to the ground and frozen as she watched, wide-eyed, as an especially massive avalanche of water came rushing right at her—

Linh blinked, a soundless scream escaping her lips, and the vision dissipated as fast as it came—it was as if it was never there in the first place. She noticed in surprise that they had already entered the castle, and there was an elf dressed to the nines smiling kindly down at her, a shining circlet resting regally on his head.

_It's a Councillor!_

It was only her second time seeing a Councillor in real life. The first time, she had attended a Tribunal under her parents' command.

They had wanted to take advantage of the massive crowd of elves gathered there to watch the Tribunal and mislead them that she and Tam were born a year apart. Of course, it hadn't worked.

Linh remembered her throat going sore from telling as many people as possible that she and Tam were twins. Tam had practically shouted at their parents, right in front of everyone. Quan had tried to stop him, telling him not to make a scene in front of so many people.

It had always been about appearances with him, and it still was. That was when Quan finally had had enough, and punished Tam and Linh by making them share a room. That didn't stop them at all—in fact, it actually helped them. Either Quan wasn't good at making up punishments, or he just didn't understand his children. Linh knew it was the latter.

"Councillor Terik. It is a honour to meet you." Quan bowed deeply, shaking his hand as Mai curtsied gracefully, her figure poised in immaculate elegance. "I present to you my two children. This is Linh"—he gestured at Linh, who stiffened as she still wasn't used to being the first to be mentioned—"and this is Tam."

When meeting a Councillor personally, one must portray their best image. Linh wondered if Councillor Terik would mind if either she or Tam told him that they were twins. He probably would recoil immediately and demand that the Song family depart Eternalia. Their father would probably lose his status as an Emissary. Maybe he would be demoted to a Regent. Or maybe a mere noble. And he would leave a bad record in Tam and Linh's profiles, crushing Linh's hopes of being the best prodigy in Foxfire.

After all, Linh thought that was the expected behaviour of a Senior Councillor. They were the ones who imposed such discriminating beliefs against a multiple birth, and Talentless people. While she did believe in the concept of genetic superiority, she hated that it instantly marked some elves as inferior.

So Linh proceeded with caution as she curtsied politely. "It is, like what my father has said, an honour to meet you, Councillor Terik. I have heard many reputable things about you."

Terik merely laughed at her exaggerated lionising of him, and said, "It is an honour to meet you too, Linh."

Linh tensed, but she didn't change her neutral expression as she asked, "How so, sir?"

"I'm a Descryer—I can sense anyone's potential. It is always a blessing to meet young elves, knowing that they have the potential to shape the future of the Lost Cities." He smiled at her, before turning to Tam. "Now, you must be Tam Song."

Was it just Linh's imagination, or did Councillor Terik's friendly tone falter just a little?

Then she remembered that Tam had been _banished._

Terik, being one of the Councillors who had been in charge of his Tribunal, must have a bad impression of Tam.

Linh felt like she wanted to speak out and stand up for Tam. Even though Councillor Terik didn't say it out or implied it in the slightest, Linh could tell that he disapproved of Tam. And after everything Tam had gone through with her, the many times he had stuck with her through the three years they had been together, Linh just felt like she wanted to return the favour.

She watched anxiously as Tam nodded and bowed silently, choosing not to say anything in return and lapsed in silence instead. An air of awkwardness settled between Tam and Terik, before the Descryer waved his hand and signalled toward the living room. "Apologies. I shall not keep you in wait any longer. I… usually don't conduct any descrying sessions anymore due to the overwhelming demand, but you know that I can always make exceptions for the children of one of our most talented Emissaries."

"Thank you." Quan looked flattered as he settled into a pristinely designed settee. Mai took her seat beside him, looking unusually jittery, her fingers picking at her nails nervously. Linh wondered if she was anticipating how much potential her children had.

"So, who would like to go first?" Councillor Terik asked Tam and Linh.

Tam and Linh exchanged a look with each other, and Linh caught what Tam's expression was trying to tell her at once, after all the nights they'd spent together perfecting a sign language of their own so that they could communicate with each other without letting Quan, Mai, or other people know what they were planning.

Tam's expression said, _You go first. Terik obviously doesn't like me._

He shook his head slightly, conveying his resignation.

Linh shook her head, but this time to indicate the rejection of his casual suggestion. _No. You go first,_ her facial expression told him, lifting her head slightly to nod at him.

Tam sighed, but after a moment's consideration, he relented and Linh raised her hand straight up in the air. "We have come to a consensus. I will go first, followed by Tam."

"The way you communicate with each other without using speech or telepathy is amazing," remarked Councillor Terik. "Even though you are twins, you are still two of the most talented young elves—and I don't need to be a Descryer to know that." He smiled at the Songs, who were all gaping at him in shock. "But shall we confirm that, just in case?"

 _It may soon be your turn to be in for a shock, Councillor Terik,_ Linh thought. _I already know what my potential is like. I have both light and darkness inside me._

 _I have both the spirit of the two-year old me and the spirit I possess now. I have both my fire and my brother's fire burning in my bones. I have both the power to create, and the power to_ destroy.

_I struggle to hold on to the good side of me. If I slip, I become my emotions, the powerful knot within my gut. I become the girl who had once thought of killing my twin brother just to make my life easier, and I become the emotional, exclusive heiress, bearing the full girth of the Song legacy. But I… I will feel like being good again. As you can see, I'm torn between two paths. I cannot stay long on one path, and it is slowly tearing me apart. What do I do? What do I do? Everyone says that balance is good, but in truth, balance is so hard to hold on to._

_The voices won't leave me alone. Nobody will be able to help me. Whoever tries to help me… will just become another one of those awful voices, trying to tear me apart even further._

_I am broken, and I am not beautiful. Broken people would never,_ ever _be beautiful. So yes, Councillor Terik, you are in for a shock._

_But somehow, I still want to hear that I am beautiful, and that I have the potential to achieve what I desire despite the odds._


	7. sorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heartache would grow. Heartache would spread. Heartache would drive elves to the verge of heartbreak. But when their heart shatters into a million pieces, they still had a vital, more powerful part of them that lives on in them. Their mind.

The young elvin boy named Tam Song peeked out from the slight gap between his two cupped hands, which had been obstinately obscuring his vision for the past few seconds. His eleven year-old sister was nowhere to be seen, and he heaved a sigh of relief. Linh was long gone, headed off to some clever hiding place, and it was finally time for him, the predatory tiger, to search and seek her out.

Like usual, they were playing hide-and-seek, and clear to say, they were already experts on the game, their skills instinctively honed from the countless years they had spent together running and hiding away from their parents, who were the _real_ predators.

After all, it was them who Linh was really scared of. She wasn't frightened at all by her brother like she used to be when she had first met him, and the important way she held herself with her predatory grace matched his, if not, overpowered his.

It was surely a strange occurrence, given how different she was before. She'd even seemed… _weak_ , but that was all before the Song family found out that she was the true heiress and carrier of the prestigious Song legacy.

Tam snorted at the thought of his family being 'prestigious'.

The hierarchy of the Song family had changed not long after that.

Sure, Linh had became more confident of herself because of that. He could see it in her eyes. Her eyes, once soft and silvery and shining, had hardened over the years to expose a lethal, fierce expression that she used when she was angry at something. She wasn't intimidated easily now, like she had been last time, even afraid of Choralmere's Vortinator.

But if there was still one last thing that she was scared of, it was her parents, no matter how much she tried to hide her emotions.

Why did Tam know? Because _he_ was afraid of his parents too. That was right—Tam Song, the Lost Cities' most notorious Unworthy, who had borne danger over danger, was _scared_ of his father and his mother. He was scared of his mother, her sneaky shadows and her willingness to give up her children all at once, and he was scared of his father, the two contrasting sides of his personality and how he had such power to change everything he'd ever known, for the better or for the worse— _that was all up to only him._

"Boo!" Linh shouted from behind him, startling him and making him jump in shock. She laughed, a cheerful laugh, and grabbed him by the shoulders, trying to tackle him to the ground. Tam wrestled himself away from her grip—quite easily, since he was stronger than her—and moved away from her quickly. Linh might be physically weaker, but she was as light as a moonlark's feather and probably the most agile person he'd seen in his life.

But then again, he hadn't seen much people in his life. _Yet._

"You might have escaped this time," warned Linh, her eyes twinkling, "but that doesn't mean anything—since this we have established that this is a game of _hide and seek_ , a game of hide and seek it would stay. I still win, because I found you."

"You don't have to try to use diplomacy on me," said Tam tiredly, "but _I_ was supposed to find you, not the other way round. You should have waited for me to find you, not pop out of your hiding place suddenly and scare me half to death. That's not how hide-and-seek works, so this doesn't count."

Linh cocked her head at him mockingly. "Well, you were so deep in thought, I garnered that you would be so distracted that you'd walk straight past me—and that's exactly what you did. You walked straight past me. So I just decided to reveal myself to you."

Tam fell silent at that. He didn't want Linh to know what he had been thinking about. As twins, they were as thick as thieves and they stuck together through and through, but there were some secrets that just had to be kept. Well, for now, at least.

"Okay, okay, you win," he relented reluctantly, throwing his hands up in mock surrender. "Now can we squeeze in some reading time before they get back?"

Linh shot him a look, like she knew that something had been troubling him. But either she was too tired to argue, or just decided to let it pass, it wasn't clear. All she did was to smile at him and nod her head in agreement. Then the two of them sprinted to the library as fast as their legs could carry them.

* * *

It felt like the millionth time entering Choralmere's library.

Linh pursed her lips as she unwedged a book from the ancient bookshelf. Dust drifted into her nostrils and she let out a sneeze, turning her head away as she did so. Blinking her eyes, she turned her attention back to the book of literature, stuffed with centuries and centuries of the author's heart and soul being recorded down on parchment.

_Sorrow found me when I was young. Sorrow waited, sorrow won. I live in the Cities sorrow built—it's in my honey, it's in my milk._

Linh felt like she could relate. The Lost Cities may try their very best to look perfect, seem perfect, but the truth was that it was built on the remnants of broken relationships, strengthened resolves, and not to be forgotten—heartache.

So—

much—

heartache.

She closed her eyes and hugged the book close to her chest, feeling the tears well up and trickle down her face like blood. It wasn't as if she was the happiest, luckiest girl in the world. In fact, she felt like the most miserable, unfortunate girl in the world right now.

Her mother had left her—not in person, but in her heart.

She had abandoned her. Cast her aside, tossed her aside, like a piece of trash.

Maybe she was taking it too hard. Maybe she was making it a bigger deal than it actually was.

But _who cared?_ _Who cared_ when they weren't the one being hurt? _Who cared_ when the little girl was the one being hurt?

 _She's just a kid,_ they would say. _She's just a kid, and she can't do anything._ Maybe the reason why elves were so insensitive was because they were immortal—with thousands and thousands and thousands of years to spare. It was hard not to grow bored of a loved one that they'd lived with for years and years.

Heartache would grow. Heartache would spread. Heartache would drive elves to the verge of heartbreak. But when their heart shatters into a million pieces, they still had a vital, more powerful part of them that lives on in them. Their _mind._

Maybe she was just a little girl. Maybe she couldn't do anything. But she would grow up into an adult. She would be able to do _something._

Elves often hid their true personality behind a mask, trying to put on an illusion of immaculateness, pretending that nothing could ever shake their world. That was why everything in the Lost Cities seemed so _perfect._ They might be in a way like humans—they experienced the same sorrow and woe a human would experience—but unlike humans, who die young, elves have _time._ They have time to nurture and grow from their tragic past, they have time to perfect their mask, they have time to wear it for the rest of their lives. They would live a lie for the rest of eternity, until something goes wrong.

They make the person who hurt them guilty, so guilty that the person just can't take it no longer, and the person's mind just shatters, the precious shards of their precious minds fading into oblivion and beyond.

Linh would make her mother's heart break. Then she would make her guilty. She would make her so guilty that her mind breaks along with her heart. She didn't know when, but someday. It had to happen someday. It _had_ to.

Her mother was the only thing left in the old Linh's world. And the new Linh wanted nothing to do with the old Linh. Everywhere she went, she haunted her in every corner. Every nook and cranny was stuffed with the remnants of what used to be, what could've been. She couldn't take it any longer.

Two twin trails of tears streaked down Linh's cheeks. _Were we ever family? Did you even care for me?_ she thought bitterly, throwing her questioning accusations right at her mother.

Then she thought of her father, her long-lost father, her father who didn't even act like a father at all. His discriminatory behaviour. His vanity, his conceitedness, his _affectation._ Everything he did was carefully crafted, designed to impress, shaped to form a certain appearance of himself to the public.

The two of them—her father and her mother—paired together made a horrible set of parents. Linh thought they were so horrible that they might as well be the most horrible parents in the world.

She was constantly getting lost in a sea of her thoughts, and she got reminded to snap out of her reverie once again when Tam tapped her on the shoulder and broke her daze.

"Linh," he said quietly, softly. "Are you okay?"

The two of them just stayed there silently, standing in the narrow space between two bookshelves and facing each other. After what seemed like an eternity of quiet, casual scrutinising, Tam reached out and brushed an unfallen tear from Linh's face. His touch was gentle and warm and brotherly and to Linh right then, it was the best thing in the Lost Cities.

 _No, I'm not okay,_ Linh wanted to scream. _You know that I'm not okay. And don't pretend you're okay too. You're not. I'm not. We're not._

"I'm sorry, Tam," she whispered, dropping the book on the carpeted floor with a muffled _thud._

Then she reached over and wrapped her twin in a warm embrace.

The two of them really were twins through and through; they faced twin problems and they experienced twin emotions.

Linh couldn't have mistaken the sorrowful, wistful expression on Tam's face when they had been playing hide-and-seek. She couldn't have mistaken the fleeting expression of guilt mixed with relief when he changed the subject, and she played along with him.

She couldn't have mistaken, because she knew how it felt like herself.

Tam returned Linh's hug, and their bracelets clinked together, sending a bright light pulsing through the jewels. So bright, it almost blinded Linh.

They might be twin victims of their parents' verbal and emotional abuse, they might have both lost something they once had, they might be two of the most unfortunate children in the Lost Cities, but they had something more important than the tragedies they went through as time slipped by.

They had each other, and that was really all that ever mattered.

* * *

"I'm back home," Mai Song announced to no one in particular as she stepped into the house. A drop of sweat made its way painstakingly down her forehead, and absentmindedly, she fished out a silver handkerchief to wipe at it.

Ever so slightly, the shadows in every corner of the house seemed to grow thicker. Mai felt their pull, but the feeling was so weak, so fragile, that it was almost non-existent to her. It didn't bother her in the least.

"Linh?" she asked the high, high ceiling.

"Tam?" she asked the low, low floor.

No one answered.

Mai sighed. They must be in the library again, where it was almost impossible for any sound to travel through its thick walls. And there was a reason for its thick walls — she didn't know if Linh and Tam knew it — she didn't think they did—but there was a secret, artificial garden hidden in the wall.

She didn't know why the Songs who'd lived in Choralmere before decided to try and have a garden _indoors,_ but she knew that it was just another of a failed project, a failed experiment to test out the wonders of the scientific elvin brain and explore further into what could be utilised as a potential invention. Because it had turned out to be nothing, to be _useless,_ the garden had been left locked, hidden in the walls of the web of knowledge, and to be forever forgotten.

And thus its name, _The Garden of Beautiful Broken Things._

Nothing — whole — ever — stays — broken.

Broken — things — always —stay —broken.

Maeluang Song was an idiot for thinking that broken things could be pieced together again. She was an idiot for thinking that using a valuable metal like gold to piece broken things together would mean that they would become even stronger than before they broke.

Because nothing whole ever stayed broken. What went up, must come down, flung to the ground and shattered into a million shards. Nothing lasted forever. And once things got broken, they always stayed broken.

The only forever was a broken forever, dipped in sorrow and woe.

Mai could still remember the look of utter hurt and betrayal on Linh's face when she told her, _Not many things belong to me. And now you don't, too. I've lost you._

 _I didn't mean it,_ she wanted to say to her daughter. _I didn't mean to leave you alone. I didn't mean to leave you for another person. I don't— just trust me when I say I didn't mean it! I thought he was the better one out of you two— but then this and that happened— and then it turned out you were actually the better one— now I've come back to you. Isn't that what you've always wanted since that fateful night?_ But she sounded so fake that she instantly stopped trying, and instead, made her way up the grand staircase and into the master bedroom, which she shared with Quan. The bedroom offered a majestic view, overseeing the great ocean of Choralmere. Cumulonimbus clouds gathered over the sky, dotting the shore with gigantic shadows which called out to her more than anything else.

Mai clapped her hands thrice, snapping the blinds closed, and obscuring the sight of the shadows. These days, she was more jumpy than usual, but she wasn't sure why. Surely it couldn't be because of that tiny little incident which happened over three years ago? Was she really that scared of Fintan? Was it not her who shooed him out with her Shade ability?

But then again, he was a Pyrokinetic, radiating both heat _and light._ His light had almost made her shadows scatter, and that was saying something.

But her daughter, her _daughter!_ Her daughter might be the one to save them all from that horrible man. Her daughter was going to manifest as a powerful Hydrokinetic, and her daughter was going to extinguish his flames with the full force of Choralmere's ocean. Her daughter, who at first seemed rather childish and silly and useless with her weird musings and her annoying clinginess, was now actually proving herself to be even more powerful than Tam, in who Mai had placed all her hopes.

She should have never pushed Linh aside in the first place.

If she hadn't left Linh all alone in that shadowy storm, maybe Linh would've been a completely different person than who she was now.

But now, Mai knew it was too late. And what she could do now was only to try, try, and try. Try to win back Linh's heart. Try to make her believe in her mother again. Try until she would be teetering on the edge of breaking.

And Mai had been studying Linh closely for the past few years. Trying to figure out what her greatest desires were, other than the one that had already died a long, long time ago, the one that would have made her do anything to get her mother back. But now she had stopped trying, and it was time for Mai to try. She clearly hadn't been paying attention to her daughter, but once she did, it was obvious what she wanted most currently. She could tell with the way she ravaged through the pages of an information book, even more so than Tam, who usually only read for his own leisure and enjoyment. She read differently— she read with _purpose._ And when Councillor Terik had descryed her, when he told her that she was going to excel especially well in academics, it was like Linh's whole face had lit up.

And during the few rare times Quan and Mai brought Tam and Linh outside into the underwater world of Atlantis, Mai had noted the longing, puppy-like way Linh had gazed after a group of Foxfire students, their cheerful, blissful laughter mixing in with the rippling breath of the ever-shifting ocean.

Linh was an open book. All anyone had to do to know more about her, was to read it. Mai had just… not been paying Linh much attention before she found out she was the heiress of the Song legacy.

Making up her mind, she walked out of her bedroom and out into the corridor. Deep in thought, she didn't notice the small figure heading toward her too, and accidentally bumped into the figure. Mai recoiled back with a startled gasp, her sense of balance messed up for a second, before she blinked and realised who it was.

Linh spared her a sideway glance of cold indifference. Before she could brush past her mother's shoulder, Mai regained her composure and called out, "Linh."

Linh stilled, her body stiffening ever so slightly. "Yes?"

"You're eleven this year, aren't you?" asked Mai.

"Yes," Linh answered. It was not unusual for elves to not have a perfect memory of their birthdays, because age was not a huge concern for them most of the time.

"You're old enough to enroll for Foxfire. I have already registered you to take the Foxfire Entrance Examinations. You had better pass, as it would be publicly shaming not to." The cold words slipped out of Mai's mouth before her mind could process them, and she was so used to being mean to Linh that she forgot. But still, it should be all right to be a little in character before slowly changing.

Linh's eyes narrowed at her last sentence, but she said nothing. Turned out she was used to Mai's insults as well. Beneath the offended emotion in her eyes, Mai could see the fleeting expression of glee flash across her face.

"Okay, but what about Tam?" she asked, her eyes filling with confusion and concern for her brother.

As time passed, Linh had grown to care for Tam, and it was always Tam she put first nowadays since Mai wasn't part of her life anymore. Mai felt a small twinge of jealousy at that, but she quickly brushed it away. What kind of mother got jealous at her son for stealing away time with her mother? That was ridiculous.

Mai's transient hesitation was all the confirmation Linh needed, and her face turned dark. "Mother," she said through gritted teeth, "you are _not_ excluding Tam from the Examinations. We are the same age, and the same age we would stay everywhere we go."

Deep down inside, Mai knew Linh couldn't give a care. That girl was always the selfish type. She had only thought of herself, and she would think of herself, even now, too. Having Tam out would just make her life easier and her mood happier.

"I will deal with that later" was what she managed to say. "Now, you just concentrate on your upcoming entrance examinations. I expect top results."

And despite everything that had happened between them, Mai knew one thing and that was Linh would always want to impress her mother, even if she wouldn't admit it. After all that had happened, she was still her mother's daughter through and through, and there was no changing that.


	8. the unworthy twins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Linh wanted to scream at Tam, she's right! You're hindering me! You're hindering me! You've always been hindering me! But she kept perfectly silent, like a model prodigy everyone looked up to.

For the rest of the days that followed up to the Entrance Examinations, Linh spent her time buried in the examination papers of past years, trying to memorise and understand each and every one of the solutions to the questions.

During that time, she hardly slept at all, a torch against the darkness of the night and a pile of papers propped on her lap as she studied under the blankets of her canopy bed. She ignored Tam's pleas for her to stop reading and get on with their usual game of hide-and-seek.

She spent most of her time in the library — she was like a sponge, absorbing all the knowledge she could get before deciding to release it during the examinations. Sometimes the question that had been boggling her mind since Mai had told her she was registered into the Examinations surfaced back to bother her — _is Mother really going to exclude Tam out of this year's Foxfire Examinations? —_ but Linh had always pushed it down into the dark recesses of her mind, needing absolute concentration in her studies.

Some would think it was unhealthy for an ten year-old to spent her time cooped up in the house, stuffing things she shouldn't be learning yet into her brain, but Linh didn't care. She would show them what hard work did. She would show them not to underestimate those who worked hard. She would show everyone. Especially her mother, who thought that she wasn't good enough. Her mother, who abandoned her because she thought Linh wasn't good enough.

She would prove Mai Song wrong. She would prove the whole world wrong about the theory of genetic impurity in multiple births. _She_ was living proof, and nobody would be able to deny it. No, not even the Council.

* * *

Tam stared at his twin sister half-suspiciously and half-hostilely as she raced toward his direction. He was standing in their bedroom, and he had been trying to find her.

He slid against the wall, quick as a snake's slither, held his breath and basked in the shadows as the door swung open, obscuring Tam, who was now hiding behind the door.

Linh stepped into her bedroom, a hardback book in hand. Setting the book onto her study desk, she opened her wardrobe, stepped into it, and closed the doors to change.

Tam frowned — to the extent of his knowledge, they weren't going anywhere today, so why did Linh need a change of clothes?

After what felt like an eternity of waiting — but in reality was only two minutes — the doors to Linh's walk-in wardrobe swung open and Linh stepped out, dressed in a completely different outfit than what she was wearing before. Clad in a turquoise-coloured long tunic and long black leggings, Linh looked like she was going to attend a formal event, except that Tam didn't know where. She even had her cape on, the glimmering Song family crest pinning it around her shoulders.

Tam frowned in confusion and watched as she took out a satchel from her chest of drawers, and slipped a few stationery items and the hardback book into it. She did all of that with an air of importance, something Tam had rarely seen associated with _Linh._

Then Linh slung the satchel around her shoulder, spun on her heel and walked out of her room, closing the door soundlessly behind her and leaving a bewildered Tam plastered to the wall.

His hands were shaking as he peered through the keyhole to ensure that Linh had left the corridor, before racing to Linh's study table. He opened the chest of drawers and rummaged through them, trying to find something that would explain Linh's strange behaviour.

Then he found _it._

A single envelope, sealed with the official seal of Foxfire Academy — except that it had already been broken and the letter had already been read through. The sight of the Foxfire seal might as well have sealed his suspicions, but he still needed to confirm them thoroughly. With trembling fingers, Tam flipped up the flap of the envelope and took out the thick parchment, his jumpy emotions making it hard for him to scan through the contents of the letter:

_Dear Miss Linh Song of Choralmere,_

_This letter is mailed to you to confirm your registration for the Foxfire Entrance Examinations taking place on the day before this year's Celestial Festival. The venue for the first examination is in Foxfire's study hall. Please dress formally. Thank you and all the best for the examinations._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Dame Alina_

_Principal of Foxfire_

Tam's hands were shaking again, so, so hard, that the letter slipped from his grip and drifted to the floor of Linh's bedroom. Trying to steady his breathing and get a sense of his spinning thoughts, he picked the paper from the floor, slipped it back into the envelope, and placed it back into its original placement.

Then he sank back into Linh's canopy bed, and cried out in pain when he sat on something hard. A few times of scuffling at the blankets uncovered what it was.

_A torchlight._

Then suddenly, it all hit him like a bolt of lightning.

The only reason that would explain why Linh had been so secretively studious was because she was preparing herself like crazy for the Foxfire Entrance Examinations! He couldn't believe how dense he had been. Their parents, being the stupid parents they were, decided to persist with the "born one year apart" pretence and only signed Linh up for Foxfire.

They were probably going to pass Linh off as the older child! The older child, the first child, the _better_ child. That made Tam feel sick.

But knowing that Linh had already known everything from the start, and she chose to ignore it, made Tam even sicker.

Making up his mind, Tam _bolted_ straight out of their bedroom — the bedroom they had shared over so many, so many years — and instantly jumped onto the Vortinator, letting it whizz him down the grand staircase. He hardly registered the whoosh of wind and the slight flipping of his stomach as he ran straight for the doors leading to the outside. Fortunately, the doors weren't locked from the outside, and Tam unbolted the doors with quick ease, ready to stop Linh — she couldn't have gotten that far, yet.

Then his feet scuffed to a stop as his eyes widened. Quan, Mai, and Linh were all standing at the other side of the moat separating them, their backs turned against him. Quan raised a crystal up to the light and they stepped into the path. They vanished without a trace.

Tam's knees buckled and he collapsed to the ground, his legs suddenly lacking of energy. His breaths came in haggard rasps, and his mind was spinning too fast for him to think clearly.

He stopped to glare at the empty space at where the three of them had just been standing, and his mind couldn't help but keep replaying back the fleeting moment when his father raised a crystal up to the light to light leap to Foxfire.

Then he knew what to do. He knew exactly what to do this time.

* * *

Tam knew the library like the back of his hand, and soon he had in his hands an old copy of the blueprints of Choralmere's interior. He flipped through the twenty-seven pages, his eyes trying to spot something that would be useful to him.

Then he spotted it. On the fifth floor, in a secluded corner, the decades-old Leapmaster 2000. And it was—

— In the library. In the Garden of Beautiful Broken Things.

He tried to make himself feel as important as Linh had looked when she had stuffed her stationery into her satchel. He threw his own stationery into a satin bag he found in his father's drawer. He hardly felt important at all.

Then, almost like an afterthought, he threw in a sharp, prickly twig too, which he had picked up from the Garden. It could come into good use. Who knew? After that, Tam felt a little more important. After all, what was that phrase the humans always liked to say? — oh, right, it was the thought that counted.

* * *

Linh surveyed the giant glass pyramid towering over her head, making her feel extremely small. Ducking her head shyly as a Foxfire prodigy dressed in red careened past — must be a Level Five — and almost bumped into her. It was only morning, and the prodigies must be getting to the assembly hall.

Beside her, Mai told Linh, "We should make our way to the study hall right now. Parents are not allowed inside, though. We will wait for you outside."

Linh nodded, her mind not really concentrating fully on Mai's words. Her whole body was tingling with this strange sensation, and she felt oddly excited and even _thrilled._ She'd never felt this way in a long time — ever since that night when Mai had left to find Quan and Tam.

Thinking of Tam, Linh felt a twinge of guilt. She really should have brought Tam along with her. Why did she hide a thing so big from him in the first place? They were twins, and twins shared everything. So why did she have to run? Why did she have to hide?

A tiny voice inside her mind whispered, _Because you're selfish,_ but Linh sighed and decided not to think about all of it right now. It was her time to shine as bright as Choralmere, and even her mother's shadows couldn't block her light.

She walked into the examination hall gingerly, tentatively. Her eyes couldn't help but dart around the vast space around her, and the rows and rows of tables lining the hall, giving off an aura of superiority with its large quantity. The tables were labelled with their names, and some kids around her age were already seated at their designated seats, waiting for the examination to commence.

Linh scoured the tables column by column, row by row, trying to catch sight of her name.

Then she saw it, printed in big block letters: **LINH SONG.**

It somehow made everything happening right then even more surreal than it already felt.

Linh took her seat, shuffling her chair closer to the table quietly and gracefully like how she had always been told to do so. The invigilator standing near her table gave her a grateful, approving look that Linh pretended not to see. It reminded her too much of Quan, always picking on how she looked, how she acted.

Soon enough, fifteen minutes had slipped by, and everyone had finally arrived, seated quietly at their respective tables. The principal of Foxfire Academy, Dame Alina, walked into the hall with her caramel-coloured hair and her porcelain skin, her royal purple cape trailing in the air behind her. She fixed each and every one of them with a serious stare, and started her welcome speech to the Foxfire Entrance Examinations and explained the importance of passing the academic trials. Linh hardly listened to her. She had already grown to know the importance a long, long time ago. Instead, her eyes were fixed on the examination paper that had just been passed down by the invigilators while Dame Alina was talking.

After what felt like an eternity, Dame Alina's voice drifted back into Linh's hearing, which marked the nearing of the end of her boringly long speech: "And I wish each and every one of you all the best for the Entrance Examinations. Now, all of you should have already received the examination paper. The time now is eight-thirty a.m., you have until ten a.m. to complete the paper. You may begin—"

"Hold it right there," someone shouted all of a sudden, cutting off Dame Alina's command and eliciting a plethora of shocked gasps. Dame Alina jumped, recoiling back a step as she looked around wildly, trying to find the source of the voice.

Dame Alina took another step backward, and shrieked as her left foot caught onto something, snagging the heel of her shoe and causing her to trip. Linh frowned, squinting at Dame Alina and trying to figure out what had happened. Then a young boy, none other than Tam Song, strode into the study hall nonchalantly like nothing had happened.

Dame Alina had snagged the hem of her floor-length dress on a sharp twig protruding out of the floral arrangement surrounding the lecture stage. And with her gown crumpled all around her like a halo and her legs propped on the floor of the stage, she stared at Tam like he was the sharp twig.

Linh gasped the loudest of them all, causing the prodigies sitting around her to cast her a look. Then the boy beside her, someone she didn't recognise, nudged her and asked her, "Do you know him? You look a lot like him, you know."

Linh hardly heard him, instead focusing on her own thoughts which seemed to throb louder and louder by each fleeting beat of her quickening heart.

_What is he doing here? How did he find out I was here? How did he even get out of Choralmere in the first place?_

Linh was too troubled to answer the boy's earnest question, and she debated on whether she should stand up to catch Tam's attention or just sit down to see what he was doing here first. In the end, she decided on the latter, and watched him carefully as he bowed deeply — in a rather mocking way, though — and said to Dame Alina, "I'm sorry for being late, Dame Alina."

Dame Alina's eyes hardened, and the invigilators scattered all around the hall tensed, like they were standing by to throw him out. "You are _not_ supposed to be here, boy," she said icily. "All the examinees are here, and you are not one of them. Now, please get out. You're disturbing our future prodigies."

Linh wanted to scream at Tam, _she's right! You're hindering me! You're hindering me! You've always been hindering me!_ But she kept perfectly silent, like a model prodigy everyone looked up to.

The children around her were starting to converse among themselves, muttering and whispering about this strange boy.

The words they said made Linh's skin crawl.

If these horrible people were the Lost Cities' future, she felt really unsure of her future.

Linh felt hugely conflicted. She hated Tam for barging in all of a sudden, but she also felt a surge of anger at the other children for their harsh, unfair judgement of her brother.

"There must be a mistake," Tam said calmly. "I am ten years old this year, and I have every right to be here. You can check up the Council's records of me if you don't believe me."

 _That's a bad idea, Tam. Even if Dame Alina sees that you're telling the truth, she'll also see that you made history as the world's youngest Wayward. She'll_ never _let you take the examinations like that. She'll think you're Unworthy and all that nonsense._

Dame Alina squinted at him, like she was considering listening to what he had to say. Finally, she asked him, "May I know what your name is?"

Her sudden change in politeness made Linh look up. She could tell that Dame Alina had sensed something in Tam that she hadn't seen before. Perhaps it was his remarkable stubbornness. Perhaps it was his fiery defiance. Or perhaps it was his skillful diplomacy that he had honed along with Linh over the years. Whatever it was — despite herself, Linh felt a twinge of pride for her twin brother.

"My name is Tam Song," Tam said with a firm, strong voice, "and I am Emissary Quan Song's son. My sister is also in this examination hall right now, and we have equal right to be in here as we are twins and we are of the exact same age."

Then his eyes instantly met Linh's, like he'd known where she'd been sitting all this time. Linh sucked in a sharp breath, along with every other person in the hall. She squirmed in her seat, not knowing what she should do now that her identity had been uncovered. The boy beside her was now looking at her like she was nothing but trash and she didn't even need to meet his gaze to know that.

"Now let me take the examination."


	9. cry him a river

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There's no place for twins in the Lost Cities."

Linh stared at the ranking board in front of her, then at the scroll she was holding in her shaking hands. The little voice inside of her had been telling her what a mistake it was, what a mistake it _should_ be, that things weren't as easy as they seemed, that dreams didn't come true so quickly. But unless her eyes were playing a huge trick on her, she didn't see what the little voice was so worried about.

It wasn't a mistake. It shouldn't be a mistake. Things were as easy as they seemed. Dreams _do_ come true so quickly. Her eyes were _not_ playing a trick on her.

She had won. She had topped the rankings. She was the future Level One's top prodigy.

And Tam had came in second.

* * *

"Congratulations," someone told her, but Linh wasn't sure who it was. Her whole world had been twisted into a blurry smear of colours, smudged into indiscrete lines, figures, and shapes. Her ears weren't working properly — sound felt like razor sharp needles poking through her eardrums all at once and her sense of smell was going hyperactive — she wasn't even sure if these were smells an elf should be able to pick up. Who knew? She hadn't studied that far into detail — _yet._

"Thank you," she managed to slur through the mess that was her head, feeling a little wobbly as she staggered over to what looked like a couch to her. It was the fountain — close enough. She plopped down on the circular stretch of marble surrounding the brilliant spray of water, not caring that moisture had began to seep into the back of her dress.

It was the Foxfire Opening Ceremonies, and Linh had already changed out of her gremlin costume in accordance to Mai's request. She didn't mind the costume, but Mai had insisted, telling her that she shouldn't be parading around in such a ridiculous getup. Then Mai had told her to meet up after the celebration outside the Foxfire pyramid. And after that, Linh hadn't seen Quan or Mai anymore. She was pretty sure Tam was somewhere in this mess, but she couldn't seem to find him. She hadn't seen him since the results for the Entrance Examinations had been announced.

_I think he's mad at me. Wait, who am I kidding? He's been mad at me for the whole year.  
_

Linh shuddered at the thought, and pulled her knees closer to her chest. With the spritz of water from the fountain constantly drizzling onto her back, she felt colder than she should be. Every blast of strong wind felt like being encased in a winter's worth of ice. Slowly, as endless seconds slipped by, Linh learnt how to regulate her body temperature to keep her feeling warm.

 _It was a wonderful feeling, to be warm,_ Linh thought. _But if you're so warm until you're set ablaze, it can't be a good thing either._

Now that she was feeling better, she tested standing on the ground with two feet. When she was sure she wouldn't suddenly lose feeling in her knees and collapse to the floor, Linh set out to find her twin brother.

It had been a full year since the Foxfire Entrance Examinations had come and went, but it still felt like it was just yesterday when Tam had broken into Foxfire's examination hall and told the whole world that they were twins. Linh could still feel his searing gaze boring straight into her eyes, blaming her for her selfishness. She could still hear his voice, strong and confident, but tinged with a touch of betrayal.

" _My name is Tam Song, and I am Emissary Quan Song's son. My sister is also in this examination hall right now, and we have equal right to be in here as we are twins and we are of the exact same age."_

Linh had buried her face in her hands and sobbed her heart out after the examination, slumped her head against her study table, and told him, "Now you know how it feels. Now you know how it feels to be the one being left out of everything. Now you know how it feels to be the one being used, hurt, and cast aside. Now you know. Now you know."

Tam hadn't spoken to her ever since. And Linh might be regretting it a lot now.

She missed Tam. For this full year, he'd always been by her side physically, but not mentally. And knowing that made her feel so _guilty._ She had waited this full year, letting the guilt eat away at her mind a little as a punishment to herself and letting her mind malfunction a little, but now that the results were out, now that everything was cleared up, she needed to talk to Tam.

She needed Tam. And hopefully, Tam needed her.

"Tam," she muttered to herself as she searched through the massive crowd of people. Why were there so many people? Having spent eight years of her life being cooped up in the glittering prison that was Choralmere, she had never seen so many elves in her life before. Was this what the world outside of Choralmere looked like? "Tam, where are you?"

"Oh, look what we've got here," someone said in a not-nice way. Linh whirled around to see a lanky girl, a few inches taller than her, wearing a glimmering family crest she'd never seen before on her heart. The girl was looking down at her like she was trash. Linh backed away a few steps, only to bump into someone else.

She was trapped — and by the looks of it, these people had intentionally trapped her. To pick on her. To bully her for her identity. To bully her for her status.

"It's the freakishly smart girl. Too smart to be true, actually." The girl sneered at her, a near-savage look on her face. Suddenly, the crowd around her seemed to clear, giving Linh and her bullies a wide berth. Linh sucked in a sharp breath, her heart palpitating wildly, beating faster and faster by each second. She was trapped. And no one would help her. "Your twin brother too. What did the two of you do to _cheat?_ There's no place for _twins_ in the Lost Cities."

 _What?_ What? _How dare she!_ Linh felt anger course through every vein in her body, boiling and bubbling and pulsing. "I didn't _cheat,"_ she snapped loudly, her hands clenching into fists. "The only people who would ever try to cheat and fail terribly are people like _you,_ who can't accept being second to 'twins'."

The girl's lips curled downwards, and she stalked closer to Linh. "Why," she snarled through gritted teeth, " _you—"_

She lunged and clawed for Linh, and Linh cried out in surprise as she got hurled through the air, the rushed wind whistling through her ears as she landed in the fountain, the water cushioning her fall — but barely. Linh could barely move from the sickening pain in the opening wounds on her arms, her legs, her back _._

Everything was a blur in her vision, and Linh felt that awful feeling rising in her again. The one where she had no sense of what was going on. The one where all she could imagine was Mai's voice, whispering to her, " _Who will ever love you, Linh?"_

Miraculously, Linh managed to stand shakily from the water, as people all around her gasped in horror at the girl's outrageous actions. Her vision was still smudged with noise, but she could identify colours now and the water in the fountain was crimson red with her blood. Her legs and her arms buzzed with the probable loss of blood. Red streaked down her arms, and her tears merged with the red.

_What's happening what's happening I don't know help me help me what's happening_

Shakily, Linh raised a bleeding hand, feeling endless moisture from the air seep and cling onto her skin. Her hands felt like a vacuum, sucking water from everywhere she could reach.

The water seemed to call for her like how Choralmere's sea called for her, but this time, in a stranger, more powerful, more savage way. It was everything she ever imagined and everything she never imagined at the same time. She felt lost, she felt out of control. And when she finally, finally couldn't take it anymore, she released her grip on the endless, endless torrent of water and broke down crying.

She cried for the girl who had been cast aside by her mother. She cried for the girl who would never be good enough for anybody. She cried for the girl who tried so, so hard, but lost everything in the end. She cried so that the whole world could hear how helpless, how lost she was. But the sound of her crying was lost over the storm.

* * *

_Where am I?_

Linh opened her bleary eyes and waited for herself to adjust from her blurry vision. Her senses felt like they had been waterlogged… and maybe they _had_ been.

She raised a shaking arm, then gasped when she saw the gaping wounds. They had stopped bleeding, but the sight of them made Linh's stomach turn. So she put her arm down carefully and turned to the other side slowly, feeling her whole body ache with foreign pain. She could see a whole rack of medicine bottles and vials on her left, and a row of healing cots on her right, like the one she was lying on right then. The sweet smell of medicine wafted in the conditioned air.

"Ah, so you're awake," a voice she had never heard before said. Linh opened her eyes a little wider in order to make out the man's appearance. He had on a physician's white coat. He had greyish blue eyes like a winter sky and iridescent glasses that sat on his head. He had a kind smile on his face and he looked nice enough. Linh assumed he was the Foxfire physician she had read about in her books. "I'm Elwin. How are you feeling, Linh?"

"Painful," she said, too tired to give him a full sentence reply. He nodded, a little sadly this time.

"Yeah, I figured that out. Some people are really just that mean. You handled it pretty badly, but that's what would happen if someone insulted me and threw me into the fountain." He shrugged, and Linh felt the idea of a smile pull at her lips ever so slightly. "And… bonus points, because you got to know your new ability!"

"Huh? Oh… _oh."_ Linh didn't understand for a moment, but after her memories crashed in like a waterfall, she realised that she had manifested as a Hydrokinetic. Small surprise, since she already knew she was destined to be a Hydrokinetic, but she was still shocked. Who knew it would cause her so much trouble? She had better start keeping her ability in check.

"It's a good thing you're a Level One this year," Elwin added, "because then you can immediately start ability lessons, so as to make sure you can keep it under control." He cracked a smile at her, but this time, it looked a little forced. "You must be one of the youngest elves ever to manifest an ability. Most get their ability only when they're thirteen, or fourteen. _And_ you're the top scorer for the Entrance Examinations. You're amazing, Linh."

"I… am?" Linh asked, stunned by his words. No one had called her anything close to amazing before. Everyone called her twin, cheater, genetically impure, and worthless. Who _was_ this guy?

"Yep," Elwin told her. "And if you need any help, you can come and visit me at the Healing Center any time. I'll be glad to see you. Oh, your family is here to see you — they've been waiting outside for three hours. If you're okay, I'll let them in?" He looked questioningly at Linh.

_Three hours? I've been out for three hours? And my family waited three hours for me?_

Linh hesitated for a while, before nodding quietly.

Her parents and Tam flooded into the room. They looked frantic and desperate as they scoured the room for Linh. Then they spotted her, and a look of relief entered their faces.

"Linh!" Tam shouted as he ran toward her healing cot, both the tone of his voice and his facial expression catching Linh by surprise. Quan and Mai were close behind.

For a year, a whole year, Linh had gone without the sound of his voice calling her name. For a whole year, Linh had suffered in the pool of her own guilt, teetering on the verge of drowning. For a whole year, Linh had let her mind crack, almost splintering into a million pieces. And now, finally, Tam had come to rescue her from the storm that had been raging inside for what seemed like a crushing eternity.

Tam reached Linh's side, and she sank into his embrace, her tears melting into the fabric of his shirt. The both of them were crying for each other and the hard times they had borne together.

"I'm — so — sorry," said Tam, tripping on his own words. "I'm so sorry, Linh."

Linh smiled sadly and rested her head on Tam's shoulder. "I am sorry too, Tam." And she meant it.

She might only have realised it now, she might have been too childish and selfish to realise it, but Linh loved her brother till the ends of the world, and she had nearly shattered her mind for him. She would cry him a river just for him, and that river would be overflowing with so much guilt, so much love, so much emotion that it might just be able to flood the entirety of Atlantis.


	10. of tears and rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Also, the lockers only open to your DNA, so that nobody but you have access to them. See that silver strips on the lockers? We have already registered your DNA into your locker, so all you have to do is lick the strip to open your locker. The faculty picks flavours to put in the strip, and they change every day, so that's something to look forward to."
> 
> There was a secret smile hidden in the corners of the Mentor's lips, but Linh didn't understand why.

Linh stared down at herself, lifting her arms slightly to examine the creasing fabric of her Foxfire uniform better. Her Foxfire uniform was definitely of a less exquisite material and design than the traditional costumes she was used to wearing, but having being clad in the obsidian-black uniform made it feel all too surreal.

She had already received all her Foxfire supplies a day before, and she had rifled through everything, trying to make sense of them. Her timetable for the week had also been delivered, and Linh had already memorised it by heart. Her first lesson for the first day of her first school year was Elementalism. She _had_ studied the subject in theory, but never in practical.

She wondered if she would do okay in catching lightning bolts or trapping hurricanes. Maybe she would struggle at a simple task like skimming the water with the rim of a bottle to catch a ripple. After all, she had always lost her cool when it came to water.

Someone knocked on her bedroom door, and Linh hesitated for a while before calling out, "Come in."

The door swung open and Tam walked in, already fully dressed in his own uniform. Unlike Linh's uniform, which consisted of a black pleated skirt worn over black leggings and a shirt-vest-cape combination, he had to wear a black lace-up jerkin over a dark grey long-sleeved shirt. Slacks with pockets at the ankles completed the look.

Foxfire Academy was a noble academy all right, but they sure had a peculiar sense of fashion. Just looking at the horribly short cape on which her family crest had to be embroidered made Linh feel sick. Casting an uneasy look at the full-length mirror in her walk-in wardrobe, she could already see that they looked absolutely ridiculous, especially when she caught sight of the beautiful long tunics and the ankle-length silk capes she was so used to wearing hanging by the side.

"Well—" Tam said, a little awkwardly, although Linh didn't really know why, "first day of school, huh? I bet you're nervous, because I am."

"What an understatement," murmured Linh, jeweled comb in hand as she tried to gather her hair into a sort-of ponytail. Her jet-black hair just seemed to fade into the back of her uniform, and she didn't need that. It would just make her look even weirder.

"Here, I'll help you," offered Tam, taking the comb from her and brushing out her hair quickly but neatly. Linh handed him a hair tie silently as she watched him twist her hair into a neat bun.

"You're good at this," Linh said, a little surprised. "Now… now that I think of it, your hair always looks good. And I'm not kidding when I say _always._ I mean— look at those bangs. How do you do it?"

Tam looked away, a slight tint of rosy pink colouring his cheeks. "Um… I have a lot of hair products that I steal from Father's bathroom?"

Linh blinked.

"Oh — okay—" she finally said after a long second. "That works, don't worry. Next time I want my hair to be styled I'll ask you for help."

Tam rolled his eyes and turned away abruptly as he headed for the door. "Don't count on it," he warned. But Linh could see that he was smiling, something that she hardly associated with her brother.

She turned to look at her reflection for the last time, and she saw nothing but a scared, helpless girl who had spent her childhood being emotionally abused and carrying the idea that she didn't belong in this world.

Then she blinked again, letting the tears morph her vision, until she saw a girl who was drowning in her own element.

* * *

The glass pyramid seemed different than when she had seen it the first time. Maybe that was what happened when one finally knew that something was going to belong to them definitively.

For a moment, she let the sunlight reflecting off the sharp tip of the glass pyramid dry her tears, before she closed her eyes and the tears surfaced again. Maybe no one would even notice that she had tears in her eyes— after all, the silver in her eyes shone as brightly as her tears.

Foxfire was like a long stretch of a flower patch— prodigies wearing six different colours: black for Level One, blue for Level Two, brown for Level Three, green for Level Four, red for Level Five, and white for Level Six— and _they were all constantly shifting._ Linh felt slightly disoriented for a moment, before she shook her head and continued to push past the crowd with Tam closely behind, trying to get to the entrance of the glass pyramid.

She passed by the fountain, and looked away. She never wanted to be reminded of that horrible day. The blood running down her, as flowing as water, as if she was manipulating her own blood…

She didn't think she would ever get over anything that had the slightest involvement of blood or gore or death. And she _definitely_ did not have the slightest notion of killing anyone now.

"Linh! I almost lost you right then," Tam said behind her, snapping her out of her reverie.

Linh stopped for a while amidst the chaos to let Tam get to her side. She interlocked arms with her twin and gazed up at the cloudless sky, then at Tam, and shook her head.

Tam followed Linh's weary gaze to the fountain, and a look of understanding flashed across his eyes. Tightening his hold on Linh's arm, Tam slowly, meticulously, led his sister away from the fountain, ignoring the curious gazes that were thrown their way.

Like a torch against the darkness of the night, the crowd instantly cleared up a path for them to walk through. Linh closed her eyes and smiled when she caught sight of some prodigies pointing at their matching uniforms and their family crest, whispering excitedly like they had discovered something scandalous.

_Let them judge all they want,_ she thought fiercely. _I don't care what they're going to say anymore. No one matters but_ us.

"Where are we supposed to go?" Tam whispered into Linh's ear, as they reached the entrance to the building and started making their way down the halls. Linh glanced all around them, trying to figure out where the assembly hall would be. Then she shook her head and told Tam to just follow the other prodigies. They were all headed in a general direction, she observed. That made her think of a certain line in an old dwarven poem she had discovered in a book in Choralmere's library:

_Follow the pretty bird across the sky._

She sighed. That didn't even make any sense at all.

They had reached a open set of double doors, and Tam and Linh walked in. It seemed that there was no particular order in which they should sit, so they just followed the colour scheme and hung out with the Level Ones, who were all clad in black, a stark contrast against the pale marble floor. They looked considerably nervous, Linh decided, which made her feel less nervous herself, knowing that she wasn't the only one having the jitters.

Thousands of bells chimed an intricate peal, and everyone turned to face the far wall to Linh's left. Tam nudged her slightly as he nodded at the wall. Linh turned, and her breath caught in her throat. A close-up of Dame Alina had been projected onto the enormous wall, which showed every fragile feature of her porcelain-skinned face, every strand of her caramel-coloured hair. Linh felt uncomfortable as she opened her mouth to speak, her voice instantly resonating around the whole hall.

"Good morning, prodigies, and welcome to the start of a brand-new year of schooling in Foxfire," Dame Alina said, her lips curling up slightly, but never reaching her eyes.

"We have our new batch of talented Level Ones starting their first year with us. Let us wish them a fruitful year of learning ahead. I hope that everyone would be able to manifest their abilities soon, so that your place in the Gold Tower and your future will be secured.

"So far, the prodigy who has manifested the youngest is"—she stopped to think for a while, as if she couldn't quite recall the name—"Fitz Vacker, who has just completed his Level Two education. He is the youngest ever to manifest yet, and that comes with no surprise, given his prestigious lineage. Let us bring our hands together to congratulate Mr. Vacker."

Everyone burst out in loud applause, though it sounded a little reluctant. Linh could understand. She had read _and_ heard about the Vackers before— the first generation of Councillors were made up of solely Vackers, and they were known for their extreme talent and their out-of-this-world looks. Everyone felt obliged to give their applause to them, but at the same time, they were envious of the Vackers for overachieving and topping the charts. Every. Single. Time.

But something about Dame Alina's statement felt wrong to her, and amidst the loud applause, the sudden realisation dawned on her. Tam seemed to have worked the problem out as well, because the two of them locked gazes immediately.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Linh asked, her voice barely audible over the din. Tam pursed his lips and nodded grimly, his fingers reaching out to interlock with Linh's. Linh felt truly confused, and disoriented once again, like how she had felt that fateful night Mai had left her.

Because if Linh was only eleven when she had manifested her ability, how was it that this Fitz Vacker was claimed as the youngest elf to ever manifest when he was two, almost three years older than Linh?

"Help me, Tam," she whispered, so soft that only her twin brother could hear her. She buried her face in the fabric of Tam's uniform, feeling hot tears soak into his shoulder as she let out her hurt and confusion. "I don't know what's happening. I don't know what to feel. I don't know what to do."

Were the people of the Lost Cities trying to deny the importance of her existence, like how Mai had been trying to pretend she was inferior to Tam and Quan? One look and Linh knew this was unfair— unfair to her, unfair to Fitz Vacker as well. But did she have a say in it? No— she didn't.

Maybe it was because the manifestation of her ability had ended up in half of Foxfire getting flooded and people injured, but Linh knew better. She knew the real reason.

It was because she was a twin. And everybody refused to believe that a twin could be as good as them. Everybody refused to believe a twin could be _better_ than them. And the only other person who could ever understand what one twin was going through, was the other twin.

Tam held a shaking Linh tight in his arms as they silently waited for the painful assembly session to come to an end.

* * *

A tall Mentor led the Level Ones out of the assembly area and into the black tower. The walls of the Level One wing were painted a glossy obsidian, and the banners that hung in the air bore a silhouette of a gremlin.

They switched halls so often Linh lost her sense of direction that she had honed during the years she spent running around and hiding in Choralmere, and finally, they entered an enormous quadrangle with glittering crystal trees scattered throughout. It reminded Linh of the artificial trees she tended to lean on in The Garden of Beautiful Broken Things, and that calmed her down a little.

A statue of a gremlin filled the centre. Linh could see her reflection in the surface of the statue, as it had been carved out of onyx stone. She saw that she had been wearing a weary expression on her face all this time, and forced herself to look chirpier than she felt. She couldn't lose her composure here. Narrow doorways lined the walls of the corridors, and Linh deduced that those must be the lockers she had read about in her books describing Foxfire.

"Dear prodigies, I am Lady Alexine. To begin with, this is the atrium for your cohort which you'll be using for the whole school year," the Mentor told them, gesturing at all around them. "And these"— she waved at the lockers— "are the lockers. Each of you is assigned one locker for you to put in and take out any school supplies required for your lessons.

"You can put your notes in your lockers and only take them out in between classes when you're switching, but please note that you are encouraged to bring them home to revise when examination period comes along.

"Also, the lockers only open to your DNA, so that nobody but you have access to them. See that silver strips on the lockers? We have already registered your DNA into your locker, so all you have to do is lick the strip to open your locker. The faculty picks flavours to put in the strip, and they change every day, so _that's_ something to look forward to."

There was a secret smile hidden in the corners of the Mentor's lips, but Linh didn't understand why.

"All right, that's about it. Your first lessons start in about ten minutes, and they're all different for every one of you as they're all one-on-one sessions— except physical education classes, which are held on Tuesdays and Thursdays along with the whole of Level One to Level Six. I will see you later in study hall on the first floor of the pyramid."

With that, she spun on her heel to walk away— and walked into a wall, vanishing through the concrete. Some prodigies sucked in a breath, and Linh gaped. So this was how a Phaser looked like in action.

Some of the Level Ones were already rushing to find their lockers, and Linh took out the piece of paper carrying her locker number from her satchel, and scanned the block of text printed on the parchment.

"My locker number is 9," she told Tam. "How about yours?"

Tam frowned, then looked at his own paper. "106. They clearly want to separate us as much as they can, huh?"

"I _know._ It's really annoying. I'll see you at lunch, okay? What's your first lesson?"

"Alchemy with Lady Galvin."

Linh smiled, then said farewell to Tam, before heading to her locker. She licked the strip, and recoiled when a peppery taste lingered on her tongue, making her nose itch like crazy. She managed to hold it in, though, and everyone around her was sneezing like crazy. At least her locker opened. Linh shoved in the heavy books she had brought, and looked for the one for Elementalism. Then she shut the door, the lock automatically sliding into place, and set off to find the Elementalism classroom.

She unfolded the paper that bore the blueprint of Foxfire, and looked for her location. Then she located Sir Conley's room on the map, and followed a winding route down the steps and into the main building that wrapped around the glass pyramid. She entered the Elementalism hall, and scanned the names embossed on the bronze name plates hanging on each door, until she reached a warped wooden door that had the name _Sir Conley_ on it.

She knocked on the door, trying to ignore how weird the door felt compared to the smooth mahogany doors she was used to knocking on in Choralmere.

"Just a moment," a voice called from inside the room. Linh waited, counting the seconds as time slipped by. Seventy-six seconds passed before the door swung open, letting out the acrid smell of smoke. Sir Conley led her in.

Linh stared around her, knowing that she wouldn't make it out successful when she saw the deep basin of rippling water sitting on the table, pulling at her, like it'd known she was here as soon as she stepped through.

* * *

Lunch brought extreme relief for Linh, and after the gnomes cleaning up the water in the room told her to leave, she headed toward the cafeteria, heart and footsteps heavy. Her Hydrokinesis session was after lunch— maybe she would finally be enlightened on how to control her chaotic ability then.

It took a while to find Tam, but once she did, she broke out in relief and rushed over to his table, where he was sitting— with another boy?

Linh froze midstep, her breath catching in her throat. Who _was_ this guy? And why was Tam sitting with him? He managed to make friends so quickly?

Bile rose in her throat, but she swallowed, and continued making her way toward the two of them. Tam hadn't noticed her yet. The boy said something which made Tam laugh— Tam, _laughing?_ — and Linh bit her lip as she set her book down onto the table, a little harder than she meant to. Both Tam and the boy looked up.

Tam smiled. "Oh hi, Linh."

"Hello," she greeted, then turned to look at the boy. "Pardon me, but who are you?"

He had ruffled blonde hair with ice blue eyes set into his sharp, angular face. He had a face of childish innocence and impishness, but there was… something clouded behind his eyes, like there was something he was hiding. He was wearing a Level Three uniform, but he looked young for his age.

He smiled at Linh and held out his hand. "I'm Keefe. It's an honour to finally meet the top scorer _and_ the youngest elf to ever manifest."

"What—" Linh tripped over her words as she shook Keefe's hand— "you— know?"

"Everyone knows," said Keefe. "The Council just wants the truth to be otherwise. It must be great to be a Councillor, huh?"

"Right," Linh said carefully, not really sure of what she should gather from this. "So— you made friends with Tam?" Linh knew how badly Tam wanted to make friends. Even though he didn't say it directly, he was like an open book. Linh could see it in his every movement and hear it in every word he spoke. Tam must be over the moon by now.

Tam looked uncomfortable, but Keefe was straight to the point as he told Linh, "Actually, my best friend is absent today— he's always been, since y'know?" Linh didn't know, but she decided not to say anything, "And this guy here, he just looked kind of lonely and all sitting by his own, so I decided to talk to him."

_Well, you cheered him up considerably,_ Linh thought to herself. _You cheered him up in ways I can't. Is that a thing only friends can do, or am I just an incompetent sister? Or is it a_ twin _thing?_

"I'll go get food first," said Linh abruptly, then left to join the cafeteria queue. The queue was shorter than before as some time had passed, and before she knew it, she was at the end of the queue.

She blinked as someone shouted at her to hurry up, then she picked out her food and hurried back to her table, where Tam had finished eating his meal and had picked up the book Linh brought, his head buried in the pages.

"Sorry, Linh," he said when she returned. "I was just too excited to read this book. Is it okay?"

Linh nodded, and started eating her food. It was of a lower quality than the food she usually ate back home, but it still tasted nice. She noticed someone had joined the table— two Level Threes that she didn't recognise, chatting avidly with Keefe. She wondered why Tam wasn't joining in their conversation— then realised Tam must been feeling awkward— that was probably why he picked up the book as an excuse not to talk to them.

"So, how was Alchemy?" she asked Tam, not wanting her brother to feel too left out. Tam looked up from his book and replied that it was okay, then asked her about _her_ first lesson.

Linh sighed. "I flooded Sir Conley's room, and the person taking his lesson after lunch had to join another prodigy in a one-on-two lesson."

Keefe turned to look at her and flashed a smirk. "Fantastic."

Linh smiled back hesitatingly, then turned her attention back to Tam. "So… yeah. I have Hydrokinesis lessons next, so let's hope I can get better."

Tam nodded, his eyes softening as he looked at Linh. "I hope you can get better," he said earnestly, and Linh could feel the love he had for his sister, so warm, so big, than she felt all happy inside.

* * *

After the school bell rang, indicating the end of lunch break, Linh parted with Tam and headed straight to the Level Four wing— in her family's culture, dragons symbolised _yang,_ representing the universe, life, existence, and growth. She liked to think that this was a good sign, that her Hydrokinesis lesson was located in the Level Four wing, which had dragons as their mascot. Royal green walls framed the corridors as she walked past quite a few classroom doors.

Then she stopped at the door which read out: _Hydrokinesis— Lady Mul._ There were only two Hydrokinetic Mentors in Foxfire— which implied that Hydrokinesis was quite a rare ability. Linh couldn't help but peer at the door beside her classroom, which bore the name of the second Hydrokinesis Mentor. Then she stumbled back a few steps, hand over mouth as she tried to calm her stuttering heart.

She stared disbelievingly at the name imprinted on the name plate hanging on the Mentor's door— but it was still there, mocking her.

_Sir Quan._

She tried to gather her thoughts, but her head was spinning too fast. Was her father in there right now? Why hadn't he told them?

Or maybe… he wasn't in there after all. Maybe he'd been a Mentor for Hydrokinesis before he was banished, and he had yet to return to his position… but that didn't make sense. It had been _nine years._ Nine years since he'd returned, and changed Linh's life for the worse. If he hadn't returned yet, he would _never_ return.

Slowly, shakily, she pressed her ear against the smooth wood of her father's door, trying to pick up any sound to see if there was actually anyone inside.

Not a sound. Linh sighed, then moved away reluctantly to knock on Lady Mul's door. She registered the fact that she was late, and she hoped her Hydrokinesis Mentor was forgiving enough when it came to tardiness.

After three seconds, the door swung open to reveal a stern-looking Mentor with stormy blue eyes and wavy black hair. Linh instantly knew she _wasn't_ the forgiving type.

"Linh Song," she said, vile dripping from her voice. Inside, Linh shuddered, trying to ignore the way her gaze slithered all over her, like she wanted to rub in her face the idea that she was incompetent and unworthy. And… maybe she was. "First day in Foxfire and you're late for the most important lesson of the day."

"I'm sorry, Lady Mul," said Linh apologetically. "I was caught up. It won't happen again, I promise."

"Pretty words won't solve anything, young lady," Lady Mul told her, slamming the door behind her and leading her to the center of the room.

The first thing Linh saw was an enormous basin of water, like the one she'd seen in Elementalism, and her heart sank, like a ship sinking to the bottom of the great sea.

But instead of focusing on the practical side of the lesson first, Lady Mul told her to sit down behind a table and lectured her on ethics— what she should do and what she _shouldn't_ do, and Linh didn't need Lady Mul to tell her to know that she had a lot to work on.

"Everyone knows what you can do, Linh," she told Linh. "And everyone knows you have the power to destroy and hurt. You need to gain control over your powers before you do more harm. _But…"_

_But?_ Linh asked her mentally, not daring to breathe a word to the Mentor that seemed to hate every part of her.

"But I _won't_ teach you how to control your powers. I _refuse_ to. I'm not going to get stuck wasting my time with a _twin_ like you." Her words rained down on Linh like stones pelting at her shattering bones.

"You know, I used to admire your family. They had talented generations of Hydrokinetics, all destined to be great. But _you?_ You're hardly great at all.

"I don't know what's the reason, but I'm betting it on that mother of yours. Mai Yin was never meant to be wed to Quan Song, and everyone knows that. Mai was supposed to be with Thao, not Quan. Quan and Mai, they are a _bad match._ And bad matches give birth to bad offspring." Her lip curled in deceit, and Linh felt a rush of anger amongst her confusion.

"Don't talk bad about my family!"

"But you hate your family too, do you not?" Lady Mul asked Linh. Linh stiffened, memories of that fateful night surfacing up in her mind once again. "Do you think you would ever learn to love them again?"

"Why won't you teach me?" Her voice went an octave higher, turning desperate now. She clutched at Lady Mul's arm, but Lady Mul shook her off so hard she flew from her chair and landed on the floor. "Why won't you teach me? I need you to teach me, please! I beg of you!"

"Because you were never meant to be born into this society," Lady Mul said, with her back turned against Linh. "And why waste yourself on someone who wreaks havoc on the society, why waste yourself on someone who is Unworthy, why waste yourself on someone who is clearly going to end up in Exillium no matter what anyone does?"

The words hit Linh hard, and she stumbled back a few steps, her back hitting the door abruptly and knocking the wind out of her. She took in a shaky breath— she was shaking not only with fear, but with shock and with anger as well.

Her Mentor's words rang out in her head: _Unworthy, Unworthy, Unworthy._

_You were never meant to be born into this society you were never meant to be born into this society you were never meant to be born_

Then she exhaled a breath, closed her fingers onto the doorknob, twisted the door open, and bolted out of the Level Four wing. The green walls seemed to be taunting her now, seemed to be closing in on her.

She raced to the only safe haven she could think of in Foxfire— the Healing Centre. Sure enough, Elwin was there when she pushed through the set of double doors and rushed into the room, startling Elwin.

"Linh?" he asked. "Are you injured? And why have you been running?"

Linh opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out.

What could she say anyway? That her Hydrokinetic Mentor had refused to teach her and rather let her suffer and continue wreaking havoc just because of her own petty, discriminatory opinion of her? That she had verbally abused her and talked bad about her family? That she had cursed her to be Unworthy and end up in Exillium?

No, she couldn't say a word. So when words failed, music spoke, and Linh's musical song came in the form of her tears.

Tears streaked down her cheeks and she buried her face in her hands, her whole body jerking with her repressed sobs. Elwin didn't say a word as he gently helped her up, and supported her shaking figure to a healing cot.

Then she curled up in the soft, soft mattress and cried herself to sleep.


	11. the girl of many floods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Your father has an appointment with the Council and Lady Mul as he is invited among a few other Hydrokinetics and Psionipaths to improve the engineering of Atlantis, which relies on hydrokinesis and psionipathy to stay submerged in the bottom of the ocean."
> 
> Linh gaped at Mai. "The bottom of the ocean?"
> 
> Why was she being called to go to the bottom of the ocean? Didn't Quan know that if she couldn't even control a fountain in her school, how in the Lost Cities was she going to survive in the bottom of the ocean?

Linh tried.

She did. She tried and tried to stop the floods from coming, but whatever she did seemed to just make the floods brim and overflow, wreaking havoc everywhere.

Foxfire. Mysterium. Choralmere. Especially Choralmere.

Choralmere's sea seemed to call to her like always, but stronger this time, like something had been awakened inside her and was ravaging to be let out.

Or maybe subconsciously, something inside her wanted to flood Choralmere, to ask her parents, _Was this what you had in mind when you said you wanted me to be powerful?_

Whatever it was, Linh didn't really know. But she knew that what she was doing was horrible and terrible and physically hurting people, and if there was one thing she didn't like at all, it was physically hurting people. She didn't want to think of the blood that streamed down her arms and her legs when she first manifested her life-sucking ability.

There was just one problem. And that was that she had no idea how to stop herself.

She'd been letting herself do whatever she wanted, feel whatever she wanted, to the extent that when she'd ran too far, she couldn't pull herself back anymore.

Every time she entered her bedroom she'd snap the blinds completely closed and switch on the lights, then she'd walk to her reflection in the cracked mirror she had in her walk-in-wardrobe.

Tam had caught her once, staring at herself in the mirror, and he'd declared that she didn't deserve to think of herself that way. Then he had raised his fist and punched the mirror, sending hairline splinters crackling over the glassy surface. He'd been bleeding, and even though Linh couldn't stand the sight of blood, she resisted herself and helped Tam apply healing balm to his knuckles. She'd almost let her ability seep in and draw blood out of Tam, and she was so ashamed of herself afterwards that she didn't allow herself to see Tam afterwards.

But even though Tam kept insisting that she shouldn't think inferior of herself, Linh still found her eyes drawn to the mirror, holding even more symbolism now that it had been broken. Then Linh had snuck a flatbrush and some gold acrylic paint from her mother's abundant supply of art materials and painted the cracks of the mirror golden.

Her strokes were choppy and the gold which had been painted on turned out a little translucent, but Linh thought it looked beautiful.

Linh twirled, watching her reflection do the same, then came to a stop as she paused to look at herself more closely. Now a pretty girl of thirteen-coming-on-to-fourteen, Linh's chubbiness as a young elf had evened itself out, turning her into someone with a slender and graceful figure. Her jet-black hair reached down to her waist, and her palest-of-pale-blue eyes felt like staring into a vast, endless ocean, with flecks of white-silver froth pepping the gentle lull of the waves. People acknowledged that she had something charming around her, but her blackened history as The Girl of Many Floods and her family status made them recoil back a step. After all,

1\. She was a twin, and

2\. Her parents were a bad match.

Linh definitely couldn't take the whispers and the snipes and the bullying, but if there was something else she couldn't take more than that, it was her parents.

Needless to say, Quan and Mai were parents with high expectations of their children (even though they treat them badly and when they mess up they'd push the blame on the fact that they were _twins)_. And when Linh couldn't meet their expectations, paired with the countless times she'd flooded every place she went, they got _really_ mad.

At first, it started with tiny, nervous hints. Mai would panic every time Linh stared out at Choralmere's ocean (it wasn't like she _wanted_ to stare at the water, it was just because it was too captivating) and snap at Tam to shut the blinds and drag the curtains closed. And Tam couldn't exactly say no, he had to listen to his mother (but he didn't want to, of course), and he was worried for Linh too, except that his worries were completely different from Mai's and that made all the difference to Linh.

They'd started going out less often— and by a drastic difference. No more shopping sprees in Atlantis. No more visiting of family friends. And besides not visiting people, they also stopped people from visiting them too. No one came to Choralmere anymore. Maybe no one even _wanted_ to. They were all scared of the probability of a flood, anyway. Linh's abilities acting up? Easy— just put her on house arrest.

Linh had tried to consult her father for Hydrokinesis Mentoring— after all, Lady Mul had made it quite clear that she hated Linh with all her heart— but Quan's eyes had gone all distant after she asked and he told her that he didn't do ability Mentoring anymore. Linh wondered what had happened. It wasn't her place to know, though. And Linh had a feeling that she would never have a place at all, not in this family.

* * *

It all started on the dawn of that day, when the sun had just risen from the valleys across Choralmere's sea. Linh drew apart the curtains and gazed out at the scenery in front of her. The sky looked like it had been painted with fresh watercolours— brilliant splashes of orange, pink, and gold filled Linh's sight. Linh couldn't deny that it was beautiful, but it was hard to admit it since she'd never get to see it beyond the thick double-layered tempered glass window of her bedroom.

She pressed her palm against the cold glass, letting long seconds slip by until the sakura pink hues that had tinted the sky vanished, before she got up and changed out of her sleeping gown. She had just finished adjusting the collar of her Foxfire uniform when she heard a knock on her door, and after a split second Mai walked into the room.

Her eyes roved over to Linh all dressed up in her school uniform, and it might have just been Linh's wishful thinking, but she saw a flicker of pride flash across Mai's eyes before disappearing faster than the speed of light. No matter what Linh thought, she knew that Mai was anything but proud of her daughter— Mai had spent the past few weeks mistreating her because she had flooded her bedroom. _Again._

It was a few seconds before Mai finally opened her mouth to speak. "You're not going to school today, Linh," she said stiffly, like she wasn't in favour of that but was forced to comply. Linh froze halfway in closing the door of her walk-in wardrobe, and she turned around in shock to face a straight-faced Mai.

"I'm sorry," Linh said disbelievingly, "what did you just say?"

Mai pursed her lips at Linh's lack of manners, and Linh cringed at herself too, but chose not to say anything about it as she replied, "Your father has an appointment with the Council and Lady Mul as he is invited among a few other Hydrokinetics and Psionipaths to improve the engineering of Atlantis, which relies on hydrokinesis and psionipathy to stay submerged in the bottom of the ocean."

Linh gaped at Mai. "The _bottom of the ocean?"_

Why was she being called to go to the _bottom of the ocean?_ Didn't Quan know that if she couldn't even control a fountain in her school, how in the Lost Cities was she going to survive in the bottom of the ocean?

What in the world was happening now?

"It was an order by your father," mumbled Mai, along with a series of incoherent words that Linh just couldn't seem to make out.

The shadows around them jumped and shivered, spilling out on the floor and the walls and the ceiling unnaturally.

"Come on, you have to leave soon," Mai insisted, her voice growing more impatient and rushed by every passing second. Linh wondered what was bothering her.

Linh realised that Mai had always been hiding in Quan's shadow— after all, he was part of the reason why Mai left Linh, and the reason why she chose to be discriminatory towards their own children. She also almost always listened obediently to what Quan asked her to do, and Linh had never put it to heart… until now.

Mai was right. She _was_ selfish. And Linh felt ashamed of herself.

Silently, she vowed to herself that she would put others before herself starting from that moment onwards.

"Is Tam coming?" she asked, suddenly thinking about her twin brother and hoping that he would be able to tag along as well. She needed him now, more than ever… She wasn't sure if she could stay the slightest bit anchored without him by her side.

Mai hesitated, and that was all the time Linh needed to speak up and convince her that Tam should come with her. "Please. I can't go there without him."

"Fine," she said after a moment of consideration. "Tam can go."

Linh deliberated on whether she should say 'thank you' to Mai or even hug her. Then she remembered Mai turning her back against her. Mai telling her not to hate her. Mai telling her to move away from Choralmere. Mai's cold eyes meeting her helpless gaze when she saw her sitting beside her husband and not Linh like it had always been.

"Uh," Linh said curtly, her voice suddenly turning hoarse. It only thickened the existing tension between them. "Thanks."

Mai looked away from her.

* * *

"What?" Tam shrieked.

Although Linh had been expecting his reaction, she jumped all the same. Trying to recover from the shock, she took in a deep breath before speaking.

"I _know!_ I don't know if they're in their right minds anymore," declared Linh, but her voice was shaking like she had still not recovered from the gravity of the situation. "They're basically throwing me into the deep ocean and telling me not to combust— um, _what?"_

"This is stupid," Tam said abruptly, standing up from where he was sitting. "This is totally nonsensical and illogical of them and they don't seem to care that you're in definite danger— and they're putting you and other people in danger for _what?_ A meeting that doesn't even concern you?"

When Linh didn't answer, he persisted, "Like I said, this is stupid. Just tell Father you can't go. It's the only way out of this."

A silence dragged on between them, and finally Linh said, "I don't understand why he wants me to come with him. It's always about appearances with him, you know. Why would he want his infamous, trouble-making daughter to come with him? It's a meeting with the _Councillors._ That would only reflect onto his _public image."_

_It's always about appearances with him._

"This _is_ the first time you've been let out of the house in a long time, though," remarked Tam unhelpfully.

"Maybe the force field would help," said Linh, her voice tinged with desperate hope. "Maybe the force field could keep the water away from me."

Tam looked like he didn't really believe that, and Linh knew it was because she sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than she was trying to convince him. But surprisingly, he didn't protest, which was a very Tam-like thing to do. Instead he said, "They must be waiting for us already. We should go down."

 _At least you'll be coming along with me,_ Linh thought, and that somewhat comforted her enough to make her way down to the first floor ready to escape from the glittering prison. For some strange, unthinkable reason, Linh felt as if she was entering another pivotal milestone in her life— something like when Mai left her in the wild of that fateful night, and changed her life forever.

Her life couldn't change anymore for the worst… could it?

She was probably just overthinking it. _Nothing will happen,_ she thought firmly, biting her bottom lip so anxiously that it almost drew blood.

No. She couldn't afford to think of blood now. Not now.

Linh shuddered, then followed an impatient Quan and a worried-looking Mai out of the doors of Choralmere, with Tam trailing close behind.

* * *

Linh wasn't sure how they got here, in the first place. But now, she was balancing her two feet on a sharp, slippery rock— which was no small feat, since she was wearing two-inch heels and a gown that reached down to her knees.

She wished she could have just remained in her Foxfire uniform considering the difficult circumstances now, but Mai had taken one look at her uniform, shook her head, and snapped her fingers, conjuring up a new outfit for Linh on the spot.

Not to mention that she was now standing in the middle of the ocean, white-capped waves swirling unnaturally around her and Quan. Linh could tell the waves were attracted to them, but when she saw Quan's strained expression and realised she was feeling a little nauseous, she started to think that maybe _they_ were attracted to the waves. Or maybe it was both.

Seagulls flocked and perched on the rocks, but flapped their wings noisily and flew away when they approached. Linh stepped over a tide pool that threatened to jump her and onto another triangular rock, almost losing her balance as she did so. It was then that she realised she was shakier than she should be, and her heart was palpitating wildly, hammering in her ears and making her unable to concentrate.

"Father, Mother, Linh's not feeling well," Tam said, but his voice was muffled as glaring white dots slipped into Linh's vision, making the world around her glow even brighter than Choralmere. She wobbled and slipped, but two arms caught her before she could fall into the water.

"She should be alright after she enters the whirlpool," someone murmured, and Linh couldn't tell if it was Quan's or Mai's voice.

"What whirlpool?" That was Tam's voice, she was sure of it. There was a shuddering silence as the whole world seemed to hold its breath for a short while, before a huge blast of frigid wind hit Linh's face.

"Maybe you should go with Linh," someone suggested, completely ignoring Tam's question. Maybe it had already been answered. She couldn't really tell. "That way she'll be safer."

"You know I can't," another person argued. "The whirlpool only allows one elf at a time."

"Fine, then you'll go after Linh, to make sure she's safe. Then I'll go before her. Tam can go first." There seemed to be an unanimous agreement, and there was a splashing sound, like someone jumping into the water. Then another.

Then she could feel herself being plunged into the air, sailing across empty space as wind whistled in her ears. Then she plummeted, and hit face first into the swirling vortex of water.

Linh woke up with a start, lying on a weird spongy material that seemed to suck up all the moisture clinging to her body. She felt like she could lie there forever, but she forced herself to sit up and look around her. The first thing she saw was Mai Song's face. Then Tam.

"Oh good, you're finally awake," Tam said, rushing forward to pull Linh away from the giant cushion. "You okay now?"

Linh took in a shuddering breath and tried out her first words. "I'm okay," she managed to croak out— her throat felt like it'd been washed thoroughly inside out with rough water.

She could still feel the lull of the ocean, calling to her, but it was more muted now. There was a strange atmosphere of surrealism and Linh felt like floating, but at least she wasn't on the brink of fainting, not like just now. Even 'just now' felt like an eternity had already passed.

There was an unreadable expression on Mai's face, but Linh was too tired to bother about her any longer. Quan came hurtling down from the mythical maelstrom a few seconds later, somersaulting through the air as he bounced off the sponge and onto the giant cushion. All of this he did with elegance and practised grace— like he'd been doing this for an entire lifetime already.

Linh turned away from him to take in the gleaming metropolis before her. She felt like her eyes had to stretch to take it all in.

The city was wrapped in a dome of air— it was really a huge force field that stretched above them in a gigantic arc— which faded into the ocean beyond. Twisted crystal towers soared into the skyline, bathing the silver city in the soft blue glow radiating from their pointed spires. The buildings lined an intricate network of canals, interconnected by glimmering arched bridges.

Even though she'd been out and about in the Lost Cities before, this was unlike anything she had ever seen in her short span of fourteen years. Atlantis was really one of a kind, and now she understood why her Elven History Mentor had gaped at her when she said that she'd never visited Atlantis before.

"Where are we going?" she couldn't help but ask as Quan told them to follow him into the majestic city. They were walking along balefire-lit streets, and for some reason, the blue sparks pricked at her mind uneasily, like she had forgotten something ominous about them.

"The meeting place," Quan said gruffly. "At the business district."

They reached the main canal, and Quan hailed one of the carriages floating along the calm water—a silver, crescent-shaped vessel with three rows of high-backed benches, just big enough to seat four people. A driver in an elbow-length green cape— Linh had never seen a cape with that ridiculous length before— steered from the first bench, drawing the reins of some sort of brown creature skimming the surface of the waves.

"An eurypterid," Linh whispered, recognising the mutation of the common sea scorpion from one of the books in Choralmere's library. She never thought she'd see it in real life, and she was kind of regretting it right now. The eurypterid's pincers looked like they could crush an adult elf into pieces, and she shuddered at the violent image.

She boarded the boat and took the last bench with Tam, while Quan and Mai sat in front of them.

"Where to?" the driver asked Quan, after giving him a nod of recognition. It seemed like Quan was well-known, Linh observed. Not that it was surprising. He was an Emissary and an ex-Mentor at Foxfire.

"Engineer's workshop," Quan said curtly, before the eurypterid started swishing its tail, creating currents and moving the carriage along the water.

* * *

They entered the business district, a overcrowded place with skyscraper-like towers. The carriage passed by several buildings with glowing signs bearing their names. TREASURY. REGISTRY. INTERSPECIESIAL SERVICES. And more. So much more. It was simply put, a feast for the eyes.

As the boat lapped against the water of the main canal, waves were created, rushing up to splash against Linh's face. Linh gasped, and backed away a little. Quan sighed, and with a flick of his hand, shook away the water droplets away from Linh.

The carriage pulled to a gradual stop as they neared a short, stout building. Quan pulled out a tiny green cube from his tunic pocket and handed it to the driver, who swiped it across the cuff above his elbow and handed it back to Quan after it made a tiny ping. Linh recognised it as the standard form of payment in the Lost Cities. Although she had never really seen it in action before, but she had read all about it.

The building before them resembled a miniature version of a pagoda, and it had glowing Gothic-like runes that spelled out ENGINEER'S WORKSHOP. Tiny bubbles escaped from the little chimney on the top of the highest roof, floating up in the air before they vanished with a popping sound.

Quan jumped down from the carriage, and took one of the lionhead knockers on the majestic double doors into his hand and rapped on the door three times. The doors swung open, and a man, who couldn't have been older than Quan, was standing in front of him, facing him with a smile which Linh thought looked creepy.

Then his eyes met Linh's gaze, and his smile widened.

Linh looked away, her heart starting to pick up speed again. There was something terribly wrong with this man, but she couldn't put her finger on it. This all just felt too _wrong._

"Who are you?" Quan asked bluntly, and Linh cringed at his lack of manners. She should've been used to it already, though. He acted like he was beyond everything, but he still managed to suck up to the Councillors.

"Psionipath. You are Emissary Quan Song, I presume?" When Quan nodded, he stepped out of the doors' way, and inclined his head at him. "Come on in. The meeting is about to start."

"What of my family?" asked Quan. "They aren't allowed to attend the meeting, surely."

"I'll take care of them. Don't worry." The man looked right into Linh's eyes, and a shiver ran down Linh's spine. But nobody except Linh seemed to mind, because Quan nodded and entered the building without another word.

The man turned to them after the doors slammed shut after Quan, a resounding sound echoing ominously in Linh's ears.

"Come on, let us go to the shopping district," the man said, turning to the eurypterid, who was still idling on the water with its driver.

"Your name, Sir…?" Mai asked hesitantly.

Linh thought she saw the man deliberate for a split second before he said, "Ignis. Sir Ignis."

"Right," Mai said. "And why are you taking us to the shopping district when I wasn't informed of it beforehand? I know my way around Atlantis like the back of my hand, Sir Ignis. Your value as a Psionipath will be a bonus to the meeting and we wouldn't like for you to waste it on us."

There was a silence that hung among them, before Sir Ignis finally spoke. "Whatever you wish for, Lady Mai," he said, and bowed— a little stiffly, Linh noted. But then again, he was probably offended by the rejection of his hospitality. "I will leave you and your children to go around Atlantis."

"Actually," Mai said, even more stiffly than Sir Ignis's bow had been, "we will be leaving Atlantis now. My daughter is not feeling well and she needs to return home to rest."

"Ah, yes." Sir Ignis's gaze landed on Linh once again, making her feel unsettled. "The infamous Girl of Many Floods. Can't handle the sheer force of the ocean here in Atlantis?"

The words felt like a blow to Linh's chest, and it was as if the wind hand been knocked out of her.

"It is none of your business," Mai snapped. "We will be taking our leave now. Come on, Tam and Linh." With that, she spun on her heel and walked briskly away from the Engineer's Workshop, leaving Sir Ignis and the eurypterid driver alone. Tam and Linh barely managed to keep up with her as they winded through foreign streets.

"What's up with her?" Linh whispered to Tam.

Tam shook his head. "I don't know." Then he took a deep breath, and shouted, "Mother! Wait up!"

Mai turned around and skidded to a halt as she looked at them racing to catch up to her.

Then a loud, splintering sound caught Linh's attention, and she stopped running to find out what was going on. Around her, elves were also halting activity, too. Then Linh felt a shuddering tug in her chest, all-too-familiar. She looked up, and gasped.

A hole had appeared in the force field separating Atlantis from the ocean, and huge torrents of water were already gushing in, raining down on the city like a rainstorm of epic proportions. And the enormous amount of water caused a hidden memory to surface in her mind again.

_She had both yin and yang inside her. She had both the power to create… and the power to destroy._

_Thundering, colossal torrents of water rushing in on her from all sides, a crumbling jeweled building in the distance, the damage hardly heard over the deafening gush of the ocean pouring in through a broken force field._

She thought that was just a figment of her overactive imagination when she was six years old. But now, it was like a nightmare come true.

She had been so stupid not to realise that. But then again, she had totally forgotten about that vision she had— until it was too late.

People around her screamed and ran in random directions— some stayed frozen in shock and some panicked, not knowing what to do— and Mai looked straight at Linh, like she was certain that it had been her.

Linh shook with sudden, unexplainable rage. It had always been Mai. It had always been Mai who she had loved since the beginning. And now Mai was looking at her like she had done the most terrible thing in the world.

"Linh, you have to get out of here," Tam shouted at her, tugging at her arm, but she was paralysed and immobilised and nothing could ever get her out of there. She realised now, that this was her fate. Cursed to stay The Girl of Many Floods as long as she lived. And this would be her biggest incident yet.

The force field splintered even more, sending a powerful outflow of seawater surging toward the elegant palace, crashing through the crystal architecture and extinguishing sparks of balefire. The towers collapsed, causing a chain reaction that crumbled the buildings around.

"Linh!" Linh could suddenly hear Tam screaming. "Get out of the way—"

It was all too surreal. There was this feeling of deja vu that ran through her all at once, and Linh turned around to look at Tam.

_Her throat tightened in fear and a raspy gasp tore through her throat as she stood rooted to the ground and frozen as she watched, wide-eyed, as an especially massive avalanche of water came rushing right at her—_

Linh could feel the water pulsing, begging for her attention, and she couldn't hold her ability back in anymore. Her heart leapt in her throat as the avalanche of water morphed into a gigantic tidal wave and swept her off her feet. Linh let it take her away, away from the city of chaos. And after a while, the deafening sound of crashing waves around her lessened gradually, and at long last, they faded to nothing.

Linh closed her eyes.

* * *

_Where am I?_

She was in an abyss of empty space, plummeting down and down slowly, her long hair floating like a halo around her. Time seemed to slow down in this bottomless pit, and Linh felt at peace here.

The circular walls of the abyss were mirrors, and Linh could see multiple reflections of herself, all curved and distorted and inverted.

But contrary to the broken mirror she had in her wardrobe back in Choralmere, with gold filled into the seams, contrary to the Garden of Beautiful Broken Things, these reflections of herself were _whole._

_I am whole again._

She smiled, and opened her eyes.


	12. hold back the river

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You don't have to go, you know," repeated Linh, so that he couldn't give the excuse of not hearing it for the second time.
> 
> "I don't," agreed Tam. "But I need to." There was a fire blazing in his eyes, and Linh knew better to push him when he looked like that. Wearing the Exillium uniform, he looked far more intimidating than he usually did, if that was even possible.

"So, Linh Song."

Councillor Emery leaned back in his throne, neither his facial expression nor his body language giving away his emotions. Well, Linh _could_ tell that he disapproved of her, but that was evident in _all_ the Councillors.

Everything about him was cold, Linh observed. She half-wondered about his life. Did he spend all his life cooped up in the Tribunal Hall, attending Council meetings and always feeling that the world was in his hands? Did he like the life he was leading now?

Or did he want to escape, like Linh?

She was feeling strangely calm about this whole Tribunal, and she could tell it was unnerving everyone— the Councillors and the audience. Only Tam and her parents were as unreadable as herself— though she knew that deep inside, they were masking their emotions and casting it into the shadows like what a Shade would do.

The Song family always had its secrets. But… it wasn't Linh's place to gouge them out. It never had been.

She should've realised that from the start.

Councillor Emery's voice brought her back to reality. "Linh Song, you are the top-scoring prodigy in your cohort. First in standard, passing every examination with flying colours. After all, you're the one who topped the charts for the Entrance Examinations… _and_ not to mention the youngest elf to ever manifest."

Linh tensed at that, but made no move to reply. Memories of her first day in Foxfire resurfaced in her mind, and she closed her eyes, trying to blink those images away.

_Oh, right. Another of the Council's dirty little tricks. Smoke and mirrors. But who can blame them, really?_

On the other hand, Tam jumped out of his seat like he'd been shot by a melder, his silver eyes flashing with unbridled fury. "You knew that all along, but you didn't give her the title she deserved!"

A few of the Councillors looked uncomfortable at Tam's words, and regret was written all over their faces.

Linh wondered why they hadn't sealed the memory into their caches if they were so affected by it. Every elf knew the grave consequence of guilt, even the Council. Especially the Council.

Emery's expression didn't change. He'd clearly been trained not to show anything on his face. "The Vackers have always been first in everything, Mr. Song. It wouldn't do good for them to be second all of a sudden. It just doesn't work that way. And nobody wanted a juvenile delinquent to hold the honourable title of youngest elf to ever manifest."

"Juvenile… delinquent?" whispered Tam, a note of disbelief riddled in his voice. "How can you say that, when the odds were always against her? She didn't _mean_ to do anything. She didn't mean to do anything!"

Linh couldn't help but cringe at Tam's shrill voice.

She knew that Tam was only scared that she would be banished, but she wished he would stop defending her unconditionally. She knew she had made mistakes, mistakes too big to comprehend, and it was her fault. Even if she got banished (which she was very sure of), Linh knew she deserved it.

She wanted to escape from this life, escape from the unfairness of the Lost Cities. It wasn't the perfect and glittering utopia Linh had thought it out to be. It was just like Choralmere. A glittering prison.

And banishment provided her with the perfect escape.

Her thoughts echoed. _Prison, prison, prison. Escape, escape, escape._ But she couldn't really think through the mess that was her head. What? Escape? Why would she want to escape? Seconds slipped by and Linh grew more and more muddled.

"Miss Song, after countless incidents, is now clearly marked to be dangerous to the society and should not be allowed to reside in the Lost Cities any longer," argued Councillor Bronte, his pointy ears especially prominent to Linh.

It took Linh a second to process and comprehend the implication of his words.

"We have given her many chances to redeem herself but it is evident that we cannot keep her here. She has to face a sentence. She must be banished from the Lost Cities."

More than half of the Councillors murmured their agreement.

Bronte's words rang in Linh's head, sounding cannily like alarm bells. She drew in a shuddering breath and brought her trembling hands to cradle the sides of her face.

 _No,_ she thought frantically. The grave reality of the situation finally hit her like a melder shot to the heart and cleared up her hypocritical muddled thoughts. _No, no, no. This can't be._ I _can't be banished. I still have to complete my education in Foxfire and graduate from the Elite towers and make Mother as proud of me as she was, back before she changed and everything changed—_

_Where is the happy ending to my story? Or does it even exist? My life will stretch on forever— I'm immortal and I cease to be dead. If my life will never have an ending, does that mean I'll stay this way all my life?_

A more earth-shattering thought entered her mind and made her heart wrench.

_Does this mean I will never see Tam again?_

"No," Tam tried to proclaimed firmly, but his voice was shaking. It's shaking really badly, Linh thought dumbly. "You c—can't do that. I _won't_ be able to live without Linh."

Linh's heart stuttered a little, and she turned to look at Tam with tears in her eyes. Silver locked on silver and in an instant she knew that he was telling the truth. She swallowed the lump in her throat and tripped over her words, trying to speak. "I— I…won't—"

_I won't be able to live without you too._

Quan looked more hurt than Linh had ever seen him be, his mouth drawing into a thin line and his hands curling into shaking fists.

Mai just looked… stunned.

"You don't mean that," said Quan, his voice trembling.

"Yes, I do." Tam looked bitter as he stared at his father. Linh saw the traces of pride and respect that he'd once held for his father over the years slowly vanish. Or had it been there in the first place? She wasn't sure. Her mind was a blur. Never bothering to hold in her emotions when she was young, she had spent eleven years of her life impulsively, reading too much into people's actions like how she'd greedily pored over the expanse of books in Choralmere.

Linh had always known that Tam had a bit of a short temper, but it was nothing like _this._ The Tam she knew didn't disrespect his father or talk back to him. The Tam she knew didn't look so old and angry and bitter. No, she didn't know this Tam at all.

_Sorrow found me when I was young. Sorrow waited, sorrow won._

"Tam," Mai said suddenly, making Linh stiffen. Her voice was as silvery as ever, as melodic as ever, but it still grated on her nerves. "Linh has to go."

_Linh has to go._

_Why do I have to go?_

Tam met her gaze steadily, never looking away as he said, "If Linh goes, I go too."

Linh raised her head to look at him, teary-eyed. "Do you really mean that?"

"Tam," Mai persisted, a tinge of irritation hidden in her voice, but she somehow still managed to seem patient as she called for Tam's attention. "You've been such a good student in Foxfire. All the Mentors speak highly of you and your talents. You never make me and my father upset. You have such a bright future ahead of you here. You wouldn't want to waste your talent on her, would you?"

"Well, _Linh was better!"_ Tam snapped back, making everyone flinch. Mai stared at him with glassy eyes. "She was so much better. She had so much potential, and everyone knew it. Councillor Terik even said so himself!"

Councillor Terik looked a tad uncomfortable as he shifted slightly in his jeweled throne. Linh stared at him through narrowed eyes. Could descrying really give one a good gauge of their potential for good and evil? Maybe descrying could only sense one's potential for great things. Whether those great things were good deeds or evil doings, Descryers didn't know.

Maybe only Tam knew. Shades had the power to read shadowvapour and have a good gauge of darkness and light.

Maybe Tam knew what she was going to be like all along.

Maybe _Mai_ knew what she was going to be like all along.

Both of them already knew, right from the start.

And yet, while Mai decided to toss her aside like a useless piece of garbage, Tam decided to stay right by her side.

"You knew she had potential, more potential than anyone else. She loved you, did you know that? You were her entire world before I came in. She was willing to do anything for you. And yet, you had to leave her alone. You had to neglect her and her potential. You were the one who shaped her into the person she is today. You only have yourself to blame for the situation we are in now!"

Tam's words echoed around the Tribunal Hall and hushed everyone into silence. Linh brushed a strand of her jet-black hair behind her ear and bit her lip, feeling the tears swimming in her eyes and threatening to fall out.

"This isn't going anywhere," Councillor Emery cut in, interrupting Quan before he could open his mouth to reply to Tam. "I appreciate your unwielding care and concern for your twin sister, Mr. Song, but I would rather not have you waste it on her. After all, after this, you wouldn't be a twin any longer. You wouldn't be as genetically impure as you used to be."

The words felt like a slap to Linh's face, and Tam looked equally stunned. After all this time, the discrimination against twins hadn't disappeared at all. If anything, it had only become worse.

Councillor Emery exchanged a secret look with Quan and Mai, which the perceptive Linh immediately caught. Tam followed her line of sight and saw it too. The sudden, sickening realisation hit Linh in the gut— like she couldn't feel even more disgusted. Their parents had already sealed Linh's fate when she'd been unconscious after the attack.

They wanted to send her away immediately so that Tam could become the only child like he was always meant to be.

They wanted to send her away so that they wouldn't have to deal with the shame of having _twins._

Disgusting, impure, tainted, talentless twins.

Twins that were all of those things, but yet still managed to be two of the most powerful elves the world had ever known.

Councillor Emery took in a deep breath and said, "The Council has made its final verdict. We have decided on banishment."

Linh drew in a sharp breath, and there was a collective gasp from the audience. Quan and Mai had completely neutral expressions plastered on their faces, and Tam looked torn.

"On the 8th of May, Linh Song lost complete control of her ability, destroying parts of the renowned Lost City of Atlantis, causing 2 dead and 16 injured."

Linh's throat closed up, and she suddenly found it hard to get any words out of her mouth. Her heart hammered in her ears, making it difficult to concentrate on the present. She started to shake. She had done it. She had injured people. She had killed people. She was a murderer.

_Murderer murderer murderer._

Guilt startled to trickle into her consciousness, and panicking, she shoved the thoughts aside frantically, closing herself off to the guilt. She knew she wouldn't be able to live with the guilt. _It wasn't my fault,_ she told herself. _It was Mai's fault, like Tam said. Tam is right._

"From this moment, Linh Song will thus be banished from all of the Lost Cities for as long as she may live, and never to come back unless with full permission directly from the Council. This is the end of the Tribunal. Take off her registry pendant."

"Wait."

Everyone seemed to hold in their breath as Tam stood from where he was sitting, a determined look in his eyes. With a harsh sweeping motion of his hand, he grabbed on to the cold chain of the prismatic crystal around his neck and _pulled._

The weak chain snapped easily under the strong force fuelled by his anger, and the crystal went sailing, drawing a perfect arc across the air before it clattered onto the marble floor beside the Councillors.

Without the presence of the crystal's connection to the chain, the chain seemed to shrivel for a split second before it distorted and melted into shimmering liquid silver in his cupped hands.

Streaks of silver ran down his wrists and his arms, staining him like how Linh's blood stained her when she had first manifested as a Hydrokinetic. Bowing his head, he dipped his long bangs into the pool of titanium, dyeing the tips silver.

"What are you _doing?"_ Mai cried out, rushing over to Tam. Linh wasn't sure what she was trying to do, but Tam dodged her and hissed, "Don't touch me."

"Mr. Song, what is the meaning of this?"

Linh stared at her brother. Just when she thought that he couldn't change any further, he managed to surprise her more than she already was. He looked like a stranger with his jet-black bangs still dripping with half-dried molten silver. Silver locked on silver as they stared at each other.

"I won't leave Linh," Tam said. "If she goes, I go too. I won't let her struggle alone in the wilderness of the Neutral Territories. I've been there before, when you banished me long time ago. I know how bad it can be. Let me protect Linh like how my father protected me then."

Without a word, Linh ripped off her registry pendant as well. Her crystal hit and ricocheted off the floor and landed next to Tam's, the two clinking together. It was as if the crystals were telling the Councillors:

_Twins cannot be separated. Not for long. A long time ago, you tried to separate us from each other, and two years later, we were pulled back together. And you wouldn't succeed now either. Shunned by the entire world, twins only have each other to lean on. They are like magnets— if you try to pull them apart, they come together again._

Linh watched as the chains melted into silver blood, reminding her of all the times she had lost control of her powers. The countless times she made mistakes and hurt everyone around her. The unearthly light from the chandelier above her reflected off the surface of the liquid silver and shone into her eyes, making them glitter even brighter than before.

She closed her eyes and thought, _This is what happens when you lose control. You can't stay this way forever. You have to find your control over your powers._

Determined, she narrowed her eyes at the pool of silver in concentration.

The shimmering liquid rippled and lifted off the palms of her hands, suspended in mid-air. Then it moved to swirl around the ends of her hair, tinging the strands with lucid silver.

* * *

"You don't have to go, you know."

Linh felt the intense urge to blurt that out to Tam as she tied her hair into a high ponytail.

She had already changed into her Exillium uniform which had been delivered yesterday, which comprised of a pair of steel-toed boots that laced up over the fitted black pants she was currently wearing.

The long-sleeved shirt was also black, and it was worn tucked under a grey vest with silver buckles and chains across the front, which brought out the silver in her eyes, but once she flipped on the hood and put the mask on the effect would fade.

When she wore the full uniform, she could hardly recognise herself in the mirror of her walk-in wardrobe. The Hydrokinetic pin glinted in the dim light. She sighed.

Tam squinted at her. "You look weird. Well, not like people could see what you look like."

"You don't have to go, you know," repeated Linh, so that he couldn't give the excuse of not hearing it for the second time.

"I don't," agreed Tam. "But I need to." There was a fire blazing in his eyes, and Linh knew better to push him when he looked like that. Wearing the Exillium uniform, he looked far more intimidating than he usually did, if that was even possible.

Linh nodded reluctantly, and adjusted her mask to better fit the shape of her face before she said, "Well, are you ready?"

Tam nodded, and fished out a long black cord from inside his shirt, strung with a single bead. The single bead held a fleck of crystal that was almost invisible to the eye unless held at a certain angle which caught the light streaming in from the blinds of Linh's bedroom and struck a path of light onto the dark carpet, illuminating the shadowy space.

Together, hand in hand, they stepped into the light and flickered away, leaving Choralmere and their past far behind.

As soon as the light whisked her away, Linh felt a heavy weight lift off her shoulders immediately.

* * *

They landed on two feet, in a jagged mountain range. The air was more humid than Linh was used to, and far in the distance, she could hear a waterfall pouring down from the heavens. Mist clouded the air like a disease, and clung to her skin immediately, begging for her attention. Linh started to tremble.

Tam's grip on her hand tightened.

"It's going to be all right," he whispered. Linh raised her teary eyes to lock gazes with him, and she thought she could see a wisp of silver hair peeking out from the cowl of his hood.

Silver. Silver served as a reminder for her. Reminding her that she needed to keep her powers in check and try to control them.

She exhaled shakily before she continued walking along the elfmade stone path. The path curved, leading to a rocky clearing so thick with mist, she couldn't see the ground. A feeling of weightlessness swept over her, and the moisture in the air made it even worse.

_Concentrate. Concentrate!_

An enormous arch made of jagged black metal loomed over the entrance, woven from razor-sharp thistles. At the center of the arch, a symbol of a black _X_ had been painted across the top with the letter _E_ embossed where the lines intersected.

"Where are we supposed to go now?" she whispered, her voice barely audible over the sound of the waterfall.

"I don't know," Tam replied.

"I—" the rest of her words disappeared in a scream. A tight rope had tightened around her ankle, yanking her off the ground and leaving her dangling upside down from the arch.

Suspended mid-air, her whole world was topsy-turvy and with the mist constantly swarming around her like a pack of hungry wolves, she felt right about to pass out.

Blearily, she opened her eyes a crack wider and saw that the same fate had also befallen Tam. Flailing and thrashing around, she tried to loosen herself from the rope, but the knot was too tight and it was holding onto her ankle with a vice-like grip.

"Welcome to your Dividing!"

Linh looked down and saw the strangest people she'd ever met in her life.

The mist parted slightly to reveal a figure in a royal purple cloak. It was something like the capes back in the Lost Cities but simpler and less majestic. It didn't shine of silk but was worn and torn from time and age.

There were two other figures that stepped out of the mist— one wearing a blue cloak and the other a brilliant red cloak. Linh diverted her eyes. The colour the elf was wearing resembled too much of blood and it dredged up unwanted memories in her mind.

"You must find your way to freedom," the purple figure told them, fixing them with a blank stare that sent chills running down Linh's spine. She stopped flailing like an idiot and instead reserved her energy for thinking of a plan and executing it.

They'd always wanted freedom. Spent half of their time dreaming up the perfect escape plan. This was nothing to them. Tam seemed to think the same way too, because in her peripheral vision, Linh could see him smirk slightly.

"There's no right answer to the problem. But light leaping doesn't count," said the blue-cloaked figure. His voice grated on Linh's ears. "You must untie or sever the cord. And choose wisely. This will determine which one of us will be coaching you."

He seemed to have said that a million of times, his words coming out articulate and practiced. Linh gritted her teeth as the blood flowed to her head, making her legs feel numb and cold. The mist sprayed on her face, blurring her tears with water. She couldn't hold on much longer. She had to get down— fast.

She clearly didn't have the physical strength to sit up on empty air to untie the knot, and her head was swimming around so she couldn't think straight. Tam didn't seem to have any sudden ingenious solution, too, so the two of them just hung there suspended in mid-air, feeling the patterns of the wind change with passing seconds.

A few minutes later, Linh was shaking. The pull of the water was weakening her, and she knew she had to answer to it to stop it.

Curling her wrist like she'd seen Lady Mul do occasionally, she wrenched the moisture out of the air like how one would squeeze the water out of a wet cloth, and the water appeared, rippling as it suspended itself mid-air.

"Linh, what are you doing?" Tam hissed at her. "You shouldn't be using your ability now."

Linh stared at the sharp thistles of the big, black arch and shaped the water into a solid replication of them. The water nearly burst apart as she used it to saw at the rope, and she sighed in relief when it started to fray. But halfway through the sawing, the water thistle burst and sprayed droplets all over her face, making her sputter. Having been closed off for so long and finally released, her power immediately latched on to the rest of the moisture surrounding her and sent a huge stream of water rushing through the air towards the both of them.

Linh screamed as she got knocked toward Tam by the force of the water. Both of their ropes frayed off and they plummeted down, down, down. Seeing that Linh was going to hit the ground hard, Tam lunged forward and grabbed Linh, pulling her so that she was on top of him and he would cushion her fall.

Time seemed to speed up as they neared the end of the fall. Tam felt the wind being knocked out of him as he hit the rocky ground, and he heard the sickening sound of crunching bones as his right knee gave way from under him.


	13. spirit of nature

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "If you choose to make any more mistakes of yours, we will have no choice but to eject you from Exillium. Do you understand?"
> 
> "Yes," Linh breathed. The Coach's eyes narrowed. "Yes," she repeated, louder and firmer.
> 
> "Good. We know of your reputation back in the Lost Cities and it isn't pretty at all. Don't come here spreading your toxic floods or you'll face the consequences."

_Linh didn't know what was more pathetic— their current housing situation or Tam's fractured knee._

* * *

_Firstly, Tam's fractured knee._

The Coaches hadn't let her see Tam— and instead, they'd forced her through some ceremony which was apparently to mark her place in Exillium. Linh didn't believe it for a second that she could actually belong here.

After all, she was the heir but she didn't have a place in the family at all. Maybe she fitted better in this sea of Waywards than the sea of Choralmere, but she was already feeling out of place here, with every pair of eyes boring into her back like daggers.

No one who was stared at was normal. That was one of the simplest unwritten rules.

"And now," the red Coach's raspy voice had brought Linh out of her reverie, "for your marking."

 _But what about Tam?_ Linh had wondered, and realised with a pang that it was what she'd always been asking all her life. _What about me?_ When Mai had been ready to leave her in the dark of the night. _What about Tam?_ When Mai had told her that she was the only one who was going to take the Entrance Examinations.

The purple Coach had stepped forward, approaching Linh with a stern demeanour. It was clear in the sensible way she carried herself that she wasn't the type to take any nonsense from anyone, and she gave off an intimidating aura that sent chills down Linh's spine. She'd shuffled her feet nervously as she stood slightly slumped in front of the purple Coach, as that was what she was used to acting like around strangers.

Besides, she read that Exillium's Coaches loved to instill fear into the Waywards as their way of forcing them into conformity.

The purple Coach had handed Linh a bowl of rich purple paint, and Linh had taken it with both of her hands, trying not to show that her hands were shaking slightly.

"Your indecision to act, as well as your unconventional solution, made it clear you are neither right nor left, but Ambi," she'd told her, dipping both of her hands into the purple paint and slapping each of Linh's sleeves. Linh's eyes roved to her now-marked arms, and then flickered to the group she was assigned to.

 _Ambi._ Neither left nor right, but ambidextrous. Not belonging to either side, but stuck in the middle, unable to fit in anywhere. Linh thought the Ambi Hemisphere suited her very much.

The purple Coach stared at her for a while, watching the paint drip off her sleeves and rain on the rocks before she said, "Since the other new Wayward has not come out yet, we must wait. There is a lake nearby and thus we are switching today's skill to underwater breathing. You" —she pointed at Linh— "go join your Hemisphere."

Linh was sure every Wayward hated her by then— she could see some of them glaring at her through the slits of their masks, and she noticed that several of the Waywards were drenched from head to toe. And it was all because of her.

But this was nothing new. She was already used to being the infamous Girl of Many Floods. Everywhere she tread foot on would have at least went through one accident involving her versatile talent. She walked past the Right Hemisphere and almost tripped on one of them. Maybe it was on purpose. Maybe it wasn't. Probably the former.

Linh only realised the extent of the Lost Cities' extravagant luxury now, as she surveyed the dilapidated state of the Ambi tent. It didn't have chairs, only frayed mats and stained blankets that hardly covered the sharp edges of the rocks. She had a feeling she'd get used to it though. She always did.

She chose the only place that offered two seats side by side each other— it was too much to hope, but she'd reserve a place for Tam just in case he was sorted into the same Hemisphere. After all, weren't they twins? Twins were supposed to be the same in everything. Twins were supposed to stick with each other like glue.

Just then, Tam strode out of the tent opposite theirs— even though Linh couldn't see his face at all, she could tell that he was confident in carrying himself around, just like he always was. His Shade pin glittered in the strong sunlight, eyes flickering from left to right like he was looking for Linh, and Linh knew he wouldn't be able to find her in this sea of anonymous juvenile delinquents.

"Halt," the Red coach said, her blood-tinged cloak fluttering in the wind. The wind brought about a bout of mist, and Linh clenched her fists so tight that it left crescent-shaped imprints on the skin of her palms. _Control, control, control._ "It is time for your marking."

Tam seemed to be smirking, Linh observed, but the mask was hiding any evidence of it. This was just like him to talk back, she thought. _He better don't talk back to the Coach. It's dangerous here._

Fortunately, he did not open his mouth to speak. But it was only a matter of time before he did, against something he thought unjust.

Linh knew him so well it hurt.

Something seemed to have changed after the Tribunal for Linh was called. He was more… bitter. And cynical. And defiant. Not that he wasn't already rebellious in front of their parents, but this was different— he had taken a darker side, like he was turning into a real Shade.

Linh could hear the whispers already, plaguing her mind. The Waywards around her were snickering, snickering, snickering.

Who would like a Shade— especially one that had ended up in the worst of places?

The purple Coach stepped forward and marked him with the same purple paint, and Linh heaved a soft sigh of relief as he sauntered toward the Ambi tent. He hesitated for a while, his eyes seeming to be scanning the Waywards sitting in the tent, before he caught sight of Linh's Hydrokinetic pin and sat down beside her.

Linh noticed that they were the only ones who were sitting next to each other. But at least she and Tam could be together.

The purple Coach clapped her hands for attention, and Linh looked up slightly to see the Waywards in the Left Hemisphere rising to leave for the east, at where the tallest mountain was situated.

"In five minutes," she shouted, "we leave for the lake."

Linh swallowed the huge lump in her throat, trying to calm her beating heart down, but to no avail. Tam's hand found hers, his fingers closing around hers comfortingly, before they retracted after a fraction of a second.

Linh smiled from under the mask.

* * *

True to the purple Coach's word, they headed for the lake after five minutes of waiting. When they arrived, the Left Hemisphere was already leaving— they had changed into wetsuits— swim caps covered their hair and enormous goggles covered their faces, water dripping down their bodies as they padded in and out the changing tents to change back into their Exillium uniforms.

Linh took one look at the glassy lake and gulped. The pull of the water was so strong that it was like a magnet, trying to latch itself to her. Her thoughts were slurring together, her head spinning so fast she felt right about to collapse to the ground.

It must have been very serious, because even the Coach bothered to approach her and advise her that she should opt out of the activity, though she insulted Linh's Hydrokinetic skills along the way. She was right, though. Linh couldn't control her own element to save her life.

So she just sat a bearable distance away from the edge of the lake, watching as the Waywards in her Hemisphere waded into the water, sending ripples across the once-smooth surface of the lake. They flipped their bodies around to float facedown as they tried to maintain that position. Linh couldn't identify who Tam was, but she wondered why he wasn't excused from the activity despite the obvious fact that he had fractured his knee. She knew that bone serums were quick to heal and Tam was probably already ninety percent recovered, but if it wasn't taken care of it would revert back to its fractured state.

Exillium really didn't care about the welfare of their prodi— Waywards. After all, she was just sitting out because the Coaches were afraid she'd flood the place— _again._ Just then, the purple Coach approached Linh.

"Now, look," the purple Coach said, her voice stiff and emotionless, reminding Linh of Mai and making her grimace, "I get that you are new to Exillium, so you have to know this. Mark my words— your little _accident_ today injured the Wayward you came with and caused other Waywards to come down with a cold.

"It also knocked down the Red tent and caused damage to the land— we don't need the Council or the ogres to come knocking at our door— not that we have one! If you choose to make any more mistakes of yours, we will have no choice but to eject you from Exillium. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Linh breathed. The Coach's eyes narrowed. "Yes," she repeated, louder and firmer, her eyes trailing the Waywards, some already getting out of the lake and some still partially submerged in the water.

"Good. We know of your reputation back in the Lost Cities and it isn't pretty at all. Don't come here spreading your toxic floods or you'll face the consequences."

* * *

_Secondly, their current housing situation._

The day had gradually faded to dusk, sending peachy hues dancing across the skies. The Waywards were beginning to leave, making the land around them turn emptier and emptier by each passing second. Linh's hand still stung from the jolt of electricity her second bead had given her, and now it snapped against the blue bead tread through her Exillium necklace.

Then a realisation hit her, and she whirled around to face the Wayward with an unmistakable Shade ability pin. He tilted his head at her like he was smiling, but she was too busy panicking to acknowledge it.

Linh waited until the Coaches had vanished too, leaving nothing but Tam and Linh in their wake, facing each other silently. Then she asked Tam, "This is a big problem, Tam. Where in the Neutral Territories can we stay?"

Tam seemed to be avoiding her gaze as he pulled out a scratched yellow crystal from his pants pocket and held it to the setting sun. A path of light cut through the air, dancing at their feet.

"Where did you get that?" Linh asked incredulously. But Tam shook his head as if to say, _It's not safe to talk here._ So she had no choice but to take his offered hand and step into the light.

They arrived at a place where nature was at its prettiest.

Cascading vines twined elegantly around tall, gallant trees which reminded Linh of the artificial tree back in the Garden of Beautiful Broken Things. But when she trailed her fingers across the textured bark, she could tell that it was as real as day. Long green grass lined the cobblestone path which led to a evergreen grove, resembling a miniature rainforest— except that there were little doors in their trunks. The fresh smell of trees wafted in the air, mixed with the faint scent of gnomish delicacy.

Linh tensed as she realised this place was home to not elves or plants or animals, but gnomes. No wonder this place could be so pretty and real at the same time— gnomes were masterful cultivators of flora. Then her mind tugged at a faint memory, and she gasped and turned to face Tam, who had already taken off his mask and flipped his hood back.

"Is this the… Wildwood Colony?" she asked as she did the same.

A swarm of fireflies flitted in and out the grove, reflecting flashes of light into Tam's eyes, turning the silver in them gold as he nodded his confirmation.

"So… this is the place where you and Father stayed before M-Mother found you and took you back to the Lost Cities?"

Tam nodded again, before he finally opened his mouth to speak. "Yeah," he said softly, but there was a dark look in his eyes as he surveyed the place. "Before we left, I snuck away his crystal, knowing that we'd need a place to stay. Don't worry, the gnomes are really nice. Nicer than Father or Mother have ever been."

Linh looked away, and watched as one by one, the gnomes slowly filed out of their little homes to approach them. They were calm in every way, their faces bringing nothing but warmth, and Linh felt herself exhale deeply, her squared shoulders relaxing.

"Tam _cháu,"_ one of the gnomes greeted in a language Linh didn't recognise, flashing a wide green-toothed smile. She had strung her hair into an intricate braid, and her huge grey eyes seemed warm despite the coldness of the colour. "It's good to have you back."

The gnome's Enlightened Language was slightly stilted, implying the lack of usage, but Linh assumed it so since they had been living among their own kind before Tam and Quan had arrived. They seemed to be more immortal than elves themselves.

"Thank you, _sơ,"_ replied Tam, more polite than Linh had ever seen him. He seemed to have been reverted back to his softer side, a younger, innocent version of himself. Maybe this was what he was like before he grew up too fast, Linh thought. We all grew up too fast. "This is my twin, Linh."

Linh bowed deeply, because she didn't know what else to do. "Nice to meet you all," she said shyly, tugging at the silver-plated tips of her hair.

The gnome nodded at her. "So you're the long-lost sister of his Quan _con_ kept talking about."

 _I bet he was saying no good stuff about me, that is,_ Linh thought sadly, but she didn't say that out loud. Instead, she tried to smile, although she was sure it looked more like a grimace.

"We have a lot of questions, but I guess those could be answered later." The gnome turned to the crowd that had gathered around her. "They must be tired— and hungry. We shall have dinner earlier tonight."

* * *

After the delicious dinner that the gnomes had taken upon themselves to cook for them, they made space for an empty house in which they would be staying. The space was a little too small and cramped, but Linh assumed that was just because they were used to staying in big, vast Choralmere. Besides, Tam didn't seem to be affected in the least. He was probably used to it here. Unlike her. She was always an outsider.

There were two single-sized beds, each backed up against opposite sides of the room. Long vines slithered across the room, sprouting golden flowers and releasing a rosy scent that made Linh feel at ease.

The gnomes had hardly been imposing at all, all manners as they asked them questions about what had happened, and they didn't seem to hold anything against twins. ("We have twins ourselves and nobody talks bad about it like the elves do!" a gnome called Yuri had told them.) When Linh told them about her trouble with Hydrokinesis, they had told her that there was a river nearby which she could practise with, just as long as she doesn't flood the whole place.

Linh doubted she could do it, but she was determined to prove herself. To who? She wasn't really sure anymore but it was time she fought for herself.

"So."

Tam joined Linh to sit on the small shrubberry chairs that had been arranged neatly in the center of the room.

"How'd you like Wildwood?"

Linh hesitated. "It's… better than I expected," she said, her voice mixing with the soft lull of the gnomes' melodic singing voices from outside. They were supposed to join them, but they were too tired to. "I can't believe you used to live here."

Something flickered across Tam's eyes before it vanished. He nodded. "Yeah. When Mother came and claimed us as her own, she sent shadows trailing everywhere she walked, plaguing the whole forest. It was as if nature itself had wilted out. Oh, and the gnomes were _mad._ Fortunately it seems they'd fixed it already. Thing is" —he stared into empty space— "It'd all been peaceful and just the way I liked it, until _she_ came. Even Father had been bearable until she appeared."

"That's— strange," said Linh. "It'd all been peaceful and just the way I liked it, until _she_ left. She had been so nice until she left." She stared into empty space as well, feeling their twin lives draw even closer to each other than they already were. "I guess you could say both of our lives changed drastically. But— I wouldn't have traded it back, if I had the chance, because _you_ came. And isn't that the most important part?"

Tam smiled for the first time in ages, like sunlight through the trees. "Yeah. It is."

They sat that way for a long time, just looking at each other and falling asleep to the gentle lullaby of the gnomes.

* * *

_Even though their current situation might be pathetic, but the thing was, they had each other, and that made all the difference._


	14. the black death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Linh knew that for a guy with trust issues, people had problems trusting him as well.

Linh was seventeen and she was running.

Racing through the dying trees of Wildwood and leaving the imprints of her Exillium boots embedded in the dry, cracked earth covered with days and days of leaf litter, she felt like her breath was going to catch any moment.

Fallen leaves drifted through the cold air and gently touched down onto the ground. An air of dread filled the air, and it mixed with her increasing panic, urging her to run faster than her legs could carry her.

She passed through a grove of black swiftly, rifling through the blackened, charred trees. A tree branch from above her cracked and snapped, plummeting down and missing her head by a hairsbreadth. Linh ignored it and continued.

She could hardly recognise this place now. The plague had taken everything from her grasp, and the gnomes had already evacuated out of here, most unfortunate enough to catch the feverish plague. It not only affected the gnomes, but it also affected the greenery around her, the greenery that the gnomes were so closely affiliated to. The plague had taken them all down by one shot.

She broke out through the other end of the grove and reached the clearing, making her way up the crest of a hill, where she could see the span of the narrow valley. A river the colour of her eyes emerged, the only sign of life left in this once-beautiful forest. Cutting down the centre before disappearing into the jagged grey mountains, it flowed with a fierce current, racing along with Linh as she reached the riverbank.

An enormous iron gate barred the pass beyond the foothills, but Linh spared it little attention, partly because she was intimidated by it. Besides, the gnomes had warned them that it was dangerous as it was the capital of the ogre cities, Ravagog. She and Tam had spent countless nights unable to fall asleep to the marching sounds coming from there.

They had also seen white flashes for weeks just before the plague hit the woods and drove the gnomes away, but there was no way to investigate further— they had been coming from across the ogres' borders.

Raising her hand with a practised grace, Linh lifted the water into a sweeping arc that towered over her head. It was like the river had chosen to hold in her breath as she crossed the now-dry land quickly. After which, she dropped her hand, causing the river to fall back with a splash, peppering her face with little droplets, before continuing to surge forward with a newfound vigour.

Having crossed to the other side of the river, Linh lifted her head to the azure sky and sighed. She walked over to a thicket of gnarled trees, where the plague was unable to reach. At least for now.

"Tam," she called out into the darkness, hearing her voice echo a little, _am am am._

A clump of shadows vanished, revealing a gap hidden in the branches. Linh squeezed her way through and walked into the place they were currently residing in. Tam was sitting on the threadbare quilt they had patched together with spare bits of fabric they'd found lying around in the gnomes' homes after they'd left. He had already changed into his Exillium uniform, and he looked like the Shade the Waywards and the Coaches at Exillium were used to seeing.

Rebellious. Defiant. Dangerous. He wasn't the Tam Linh used to know, but Linh could still see little glimmers of the old him inside. The three years they'd spent in Wildwood had softened and hardened him at the same time. For Linh, it had hardened her. Some nights, she would think back about Quan and Mai, especially Mai, and wonder if they ever missed them. Maybe. Maybe not. Tam didn't know she still missed her family, and for good reason. If he knew she still missed them, he would be mad. Linh knew why. She _was_ mad at her parents. But secretly deep down, she felt like she was empty inside.

"You ready for another day in Exillium?" she asked Tam. Tam took her offered hand and nodded. Then the light from one of their beads whisked them away to an unknown future.

* * *

"Welcome to your Dividing!" the red Coach roared, walking out of the school's hiding place with the other Coaches.

Tam's ears burned.

The Waywards stayed behind the thick, thick mist, but it was like a one-way mirror— the new Waywards couldn't see them, but they could see the new Waywards.

Tam stared as he watched not one, not two, not three, not four, but _five_ Waywards dangle upside down, their ankles ensnared by the thick ropes the Coaches always used. Their ability pins glinted in the morning sun, reflecting into Tam's eyes and making his head throb. Like he hadn't had enough of Choralmere's reflective light.

But one of the Waywards had _four ability pins._

Given that the Coaches had walked out of the mist and had distanced themselves from the Waywards, some of the Waywards had begun to whisper with each other, and Linh also saw this as a sign to communicate with Tam, because she nudged him and whispered into his ear, "First time seeing so many Waywards at once. And look at that one— they have four pins!"

"No kidding," Tam replied sarcastically. "Everyone's ought to have noticed that by now—"

He was cut off as one of the new Waywards shrieked as he fell to the ground, leaving one of his boots and his pants behind.

"Are you okay?" the Wayward with four ability pins called out to him. Tam flinched at her voice. A girl, probably a little younger than her judging by her naive-sounding voice.

"I've been better," the fallen Wayward replied. Tam stiffened. Where had he heard that voice before? Why did it sound so familiar? He couldn't put a finger to it. "Guess I forgot to brace for the fall."

"He also forgot his pants," the blue Coach said with a mocking tone, causing the Waywards to laugh too. Tam snickered, forgetting his worries, and even Linh seemed to be smiling behind her mask.

The blue Coach yelled for silence, and continued with the Dividing. Another new Wayward had fashioned the buckles of his vest into a silver blade to cut away the rope, and he cushioned his fall as he levitated perfectly to the ground. This one actually had the experience, unlike the first one.

Now that there were only three Waywards left, the Coaches were getting more impatient. A girl— judging by her voice as she shouted— made use of the razor-sharp arch to cut away her rope, and she was out.

She was defiant and determined. Tam decided he liked that.

Two left. The Wayward with four ability pins was one of them. Tam was surprised she hadn't gotten out yet, considering she was the most talented of them all. Did this prove that abilities didn't define them? He wasn't that sure. But watching as the other remaining Wayward passed his Dividing, leaving only the multi-talented Wayward dangling in the air, Tam was already half-convinced.

 _The Council ought to see this,_ he thought to himself.

"NO ASSISTANCE ALLOWED!" all three Coaches hollered at the just-freed Wayward as he tried to go over and help the sole Wayward, still suspended in mid-air by the rope.

Tam watched curiously as the multi-talented Wayward reached under her Exillium vest to pull out something he couldn't quite make out— was it a necklace? —and hold it to the flaring rays of sunrise.

Her left leg burst into white-hot flames, eliciting a collective gasp from the Waywards around Tam. He heard Linh suck in a breath, and when he stole a sideway glance at her, he knew what she was already planning to do.

"Don't be stupid," he hissed. "You'll get yourself in trouble."

Linh turned to look at him, and the fire that burned in her eyes was almost as bright as the flames burning the Wayward's leg.

"I do what I want," she said, and raised her arm.

A colossal tidal wave rose from the mist and crashed against the Arch of Dividing.

* * *

Next thing Linh knew, she had been delivered a stinging slap across her cheek. She drew in a pained breath as she raised her gaze tentatively to eye the purple Coach.

"Never do that again," her Coach hissed at her, "unless you're asking to get ejected. You got out lucky this time. Next time you make mistakes like this, you're out. No excuses."

Linh nodded silently, bowing her head in seeming shame, until the purple Coach stalked away from her and walked into the sunlight to conduct the Marking for the five— no, three Waywards. The other two Waywards had been injured and they were probably in the Healing Tent getting slipshod treatment.

Linh sat down beside Tam, and judging by his tight fists, he probably was angry at the purple Coach for mistreating her. But it was okay. She had indeed broken the rules the Coaches had set for her, although by doing so she had saved the girl's life, however much the Coaches could deny it.

The two of them always sat next to each other, and they were the only Waywards who did that. They sat as close as possible to each other without technically touching their shoulders, and Tam always angled his body toward her, making it clear he wouldn't allow being separated from her. She felt the same way, too, but she didn't dare to be as outright as him, instead choosing to play the meek and obedient character, the role she had always slipped into in her early days at Choralmere.

Two of the Waywards were sorted into the Right Hemisphere, and the other into the Left Hemisphere. Linh wondered if there would be any sorted into Tam's and her hemisphere. People were rarely sorted into the Ambi Hemisphere. After a long wait, which elicited a plethora of irritated protests from the Waywards, the remaining two new Waywards stumbled out of the Healing Tent and faced their Marking.

The Empath was sorted into the Left Hemisphere— typical, considering his impulsive solution and the fact that he was the first to get out— and the multi-talented one was sorted into… the Ambidextrous Hemisphere.

When the Coach announced that they would be switching the lesson to appetite suppression, everyone groaned, but Linh wasn't one of them. Anything would be better than breathing underwater. Anything.

Linh looked at her in slight interest as she gingerly walked past the Left Hemisphere to get over to their tent. A few Left Waywards tried to trip the girl— typical of them— but she managed to walk into their tent and sit down in the secluded back seat without falling down once. The girl was sitting two metres beside Tam— and the close proximity enabled Linh to scrutinise her better. Tam seemed interested in her as well— his head slightly tilted towards her. The strange thing was, the multi-talented Wayward was also studying them rather indiscreetly as she stared at Tam.

Four ability pins. Linh recognised them as a Telepath, a Polyglot, and an _Inflictor._ Wow. Who was this girl? She didn't recognise her fourth ability pin— a starry sky with a flying… was that an unicorn with wings? Wasn't that an alicorn?

Alicorns were super rare— in fact, there was only one known alicorn currently in existence, anyway, that was what she had read back in Choralmere. That seemed like a very long time ago. Quan and Mai were like a faraway dream.

She had to tear her eyes away from the girl when the Coach shouted for everyone to get into position. Linh crossed her legs with practised ease and straightened her back robotically and waited for the Coach's next command.

Three hours passed by without difficulty, although Linh's stomach occasionally rumbled. The new Wayward seemed to be having it the hardest as Linh could hear her stomach grumble every fifteen seconds. The Coach was getting increasingly impatient with her, but she didn't seem affected as she kept glancing over to the Waywards on the right— she was telepathically conversing with someone in the Right Hemisphere— probably one of the other new Waywards.

Tam immediately switched his gaze to look at the girl, and Linh looked down, trying not to draw too much attention. Or maybe it was the way her head spun. She felt herself start to sway and her head felt as light as a feather drifting with the wind. She felt strong arms guide her to put her head between her knees, and silently thanked Tam.

After she caught her breath, she heard Tam shadow-whisper to her, "You okay?"

Linh nodded— not really a nod at all, but Tam still saw it.

After they had been dismissed, they headed toward the golden pavilion, where the blue Coach was holding out a jar of green beads like he usually did. The purple Coach clapped her hands and the beads floated until each Wayward had a bead hovering over their head.

Linh gazed up at the green bead hovering in mid-air, a stark contrast to the blazing red of the sunset. It was just another day of survival in the wild. Except that… the gnomes, Linh's secondary support in the Neutral Territories, were gone now. She only had Tam left. And she was going to hold on to him as hard as she could.

"Accepting comes with sacrifice," the blue Coach said. "The cost of continuing your fight for redemption."

_Continuing my fight for redemption._

"You choose your own path," the purple Coach told them.

_I choose my own path._

Linh's fingers tightened around the bead, and gritted her teeth as electricity blasted through her body. She was paralysed for a second before she could move again. It was harmless for the other Waywards— it was merely static to them— but as a Hydrokinetic, electricity affected her more than it did for non-Hydrokinetics.

But surviving it all the same proved that she was a fighter. That she was strong.

She tied the bead onto her black cord, and it felt all the more heavier as she looped her cord around her neck four times, making her realise how long exactly she had been stuck in this place. Could she really hold on any further?

 _Two more years,_ she told herself. _Two more years and we'll be free._

She turned back to see Tam walking away from the girl with four abilities. She shot him a questioning look from beneath her mask, but he didn't say anything as he returned by her side. So she raised the crystal to the light, and they were gone.

* * *

The second they glittered onto the wasted ground of the Wildwood Colony, Linh whirled on Tam. "What did you talk to her about?"

Tam ripped his mask off and sighed. He looked wearier than Linh was used to seeing. "I don't know. I talked to her and tried to gauge her character. She seems _different_ somehow, but I can't be sure. I don't want to misjudge her personality on the first day. She could be trying to trick us and we would never know."

"Tam," Linh said tiredly. "She doesn't even know us. How would she know to con us?"

"I don't know," Tam said, pacing up and down the blackened grove. "But she asked me to thank you for her. You know, for saving her life with that huge wave of yours. Were you out of your mind?"

Linh's heart leaped when she heard that, but she tried to look nonchalant as she replied, "She was going to _die,_ Tam. You can't tell me you won't save someone who was on the verge of death, even if you didn't know them."

"Yeah, but— " Tam sighed as he cut himself off half-sentence. He strode over to their hiding place and walked inside. "I'm tired. You must be as well. Come on, you need some rest."

"Tam, we need _food._ It's dinner, and I'm starving. We just had appetite suppression and we can't go another few hours without eating a single thing."

He fished into his Exillium vest and held up four ripened fruits. "Stole them from the Coaches' supply when they weren't looking. Of course, I could only sneak one at a time. These were saved up."

Linh's heart twisted— they were so poor that Tam had to resort to Unworthy methods to cope— but she forced a smile and said, "Thanks" as she sat down beside Tam to eat.

They munched on their fruits in companionable silence like they always did, but after a while Linh broke the silence, saying, "You know… I think that we should trust her. Maybe we could make friends with her. Even if you don't want to, we could borrow resources from her anyway. She probably has it better than us."

Tam remained silent for a second before he blurted out, "We shouldn't trust anyone. Look what happened last time with our parents." He was shouting and he seemed angry, but Linh saw the tears streaking down his cheeks and his silently shaking body. Linh pulled him closer and held on to him in an attempt to offer him comfort.

"I know, Tam," she whispered as fractured memories of their past flashed across her vision. She squeezed her eyes shut and focused on what mattered— her twin. Tam. Tam was all that mattered. "I know."

They sat that way for a few minutes, Tam trembling not from cold but from something else and Linh's arm strung around his shoulders as she munched on the remains of the juicy fruit. But after a while, Tam stopped and pulled himself away from Linh's embrace.

"One week," he mumbled. "Give me one week and I'll see if she really is to be trusted."

* * *

_The first day._

"Where are we?" Nameless Girl asked as she and her friends arrived at the heart of the plague zone Exillium had moved to. _Bosk Gorge,_ Tam thought to himself as he stared at her, _don't you know curiosity kills the cat?_

Next thing he knew, the conversation had been carried on and the blue Coach was saying, "That's not _our_ world. It's simply scenery."

The words did sting a little even for Tam, but he kind of agreed with the Coach. Years of staying in the wilderness of the Neutral Territories had hardened him, and memories of the horrible past he had with Quan and Mai didn't help as well. Besides, who would want to live with those horrible people?

"We know our place, and the role we're expected to play," the purple Coach said stiffly. "The five of you need to learn yours. You're no longer part of a community. You're fighting for survival and redemption."

"But how is it redeeming to only care about ourselves?" Nameless Girl cut in, interrupting the Coaches, her voice burning with a fire Tam widened his eyes to. Linh looked up from the ground and stared at the girl, seemingly stunned.

Linh was right. This girl _was_ different, and in the good way.

* * *

Tam watched, wide-eyed as Nameless Girl raced toward the cliff— and jumped. And for the first time, she managed to levitate. Another Wayward— from the Right Hemisphere— jumped too, and joined her as they levitated together, floating toward the withered trees. Then they touched down, and raced into the small grove.

The Waywards ceased their activities to buzz about what had just happened, and the Coaches were too distracted to call for silence. Linh tilted her head at Tam in question, but Tam didn't know what she was trying to do, too.

A few minutes later the two Waywards launched up from the ground and tumbled onto the cliff again.

"We need the physician," Nameless Girl shouted over the din the other Waywards were making, as she raced toward the Healing Tent. She was quickly barred, but she seemed insistent in helping the gnome. Her actions stirred something in Tam, and he watched silently as the two Waywards argued with the Coaches over the unconscious, frail-looking gnome.

The sight of the plague-infected gnome sent Tam into overdrive as he lapsed into memories of the gnomes back in Wildwood and one look at Linh's shaking figure made it clear that it was affecting her, too.

Before Tam knew it, the two of them had carried the gnome to the edge of the cliff, leapt… and plummeted into— was that a _black hole_ that lightning had ripped out of the air? — vanishing into thin air.

* * *

Chaos. Total chaos.

That was what Linh would use to describe the situation after the boy and Nameless Girl had seemingly vanished into thin air.

The purple Coach had fainted, and the blue and the red Coach looked stricken and stunned in shock as they stood there motionless. Everyone was screaming and discussing about the plague and whether it really did affect elves, and by then the Coaches were trying in vain to silence them.

She and Tam had discussed with each other but to no avail, as after all, they were all detached from the Lost Cities and they had no way of knowing what was happening for certain. She was pretty sure that the two of them would get ejected from Exillium, and some of the other Waywards were demanding to know that as well. By the end of the day she was twisting her fingers nervously.

"Don't worry," Tam shadow-whispered to her. "I'll go talk to them and make sure they don't get ejected."

Linh knew that for a guy with trust issues, people had problems trusting him as well. But she didn't stop him, and watched as he stretched his shadow to converse with the girl in the Right Hemisphere.

* * *

_The second day._

It seemed like Nameless Girl had actually listened to what Tam had to say. Least to say, Tam was surprised. But after all, ever since he met her, it had been an unending chain of surprises.

Naturally, the Coaches were quick to reprimand, but instead of shaming the Coaches for their selfish lack of consideration like Tam thought she would, she took a deep breath and told them quietly, "Sometimes the greatest power comes from showing mercy. Especially to those who may not deserve it. Aren't we all hoping for a second chance?"

The words struck a chord in Tam's heart, and he looked up. Ever since he had been expelled, he thought that no one would give him a second chance— and he was right. The Coaches thought he was blatantly Unworthy, as once an elf detaches himself from the radiant glory of the Lost Cities, his worth is taken away. Thus, he played along, slipping into the role of the rebellious kid he was always meant to play. But deep down, he was always secretly hoping for a second chance. Hoping that someone would give him a second chance. But nobody ever did.

Until now.

The Coaches seemed moved as well— something Tam had never seen them be— and they relented this once and continued with the lessons. They seemed softer than usual, and Tam also felt slightly mollified as he sat through the long hours of body temperature regulation. For once, he didn't cheat, he didn't use his ability to cover himself with shadows so that he remained perfectly comfortable. For once, he forced himself to bear the blistering sunlight.

When the sun sank low enough to stretch the shadows into angled smudges, he decided that it was finally appropriate to conduct his shadow-whispering conversation with Nameless Girl.

"How were you not arrested yesterday?" he asked her curiously.

Nameless Girl stiffened in surprise, before she relaxed at his voice and transmitted to him, _I still have a few friends in the Lost Cities._ A pause. _I hope I have a couple here, too._

Tam's heart skipped a beat. He had never been asked to be friends before.

His mind flashbacked to his short time in Foxfire, and how he had simply tagged along, silently begging to be included in their clique. Keefe Sencen was nice to him and fun to be with, but he had never really regarded Tam as one of his friends— he was just waiting for his absent friend to reappear in school.

But now, Nameless Girl was asking to be friends with him. And Linh. Although it was just a subtle implication, Tam could sense the earnesty in her voice.

"You already have the four you came with," he reminded her. "Do you really have room for more?"

_Can you have too many friends?_

Now it was Tam's turn to stiffen. Could he have too many friends? Could he? What did that mean anyway? He had never been friends with anybody before. How would he know?

Sensing that he had been silent for a long time, he took in a deep breath as he told Nameless Girl, "I wouldn't know."

* * *

_The third day._

The next day, Exillium brought them to the side of a rocky mountain, where a gaping hole granted entrance into a dark cavern. The Coaches led them inside and they walked farther and farther until the damp, black air blotted out the light completely.

Tam's ability as a Shade enabled him with night vision, and the silhouettes of Linh, the Waywards around him, and the Coaches glowed fluorescent green as even the minute details mapped themselves out as clear as they would in daylight. The Coaches knew that he could see perfectly well in the dark, but left him alone as night vision was a fundamental part of being a Shade and there was no way he could force himself not to see clearly in the darkness.

Nameless Girl seemed to be quite afraid of the dark, Tam noted. She was fumbling around in the darkness, and her hands were trembling as she cradled her head and curled into a fetal position. Tam could hear her breaths coming out in laboured huffs, even though she wasn't exerting herself at all.

 _She must be claustrophobic,_ Tam deduced, _or nyctophobic._

He decided to talk to her— maybe it would distract her from her fear of the dark.

"Are you afraid of the dark?" he asked her.

 _I'm afraid of things that use darkness to hide._ She shuddered.

"Creepy crawly things?"

 _Those aren't my favourite,_ she admitted, her mental voice trembling slightly.

That made him smile a little. "But clearly not what's making you shiver. Monsters, then?" he teased her.

Surprisingly, she didn't smile. In fact, she looked absolutely terrified, her fingers clutching at her knees tightly. Maybe this fear of hers went down deeper than he'd initially thought.

 _Monsters come in all shapes and sizes,_ she said quietly after a moment.

Tam decided to venture a little further. What if she was talking about the plague? "Like the ones behind the plague?" he asked, his voice tentative.

Nameless Girl froze. _What do you mean? Did you see something?_ Her voice had turned frantic, and she whirled her head around, trying to find him, probably.

Tam thought back to what he'd seen in the past few weeks. The mysterious white flashes coming from Ravagog. The plague taking away the gnomes to Lumeneria. The Councillors and a few black-robed elves coming over to investigate the plague in Wildwood, and the Councillors' scandalous conversation. He could still remember every single detail.

"I've seen a lot of things."

_Like what?_

Nameless Girl could finally see in the dark, Tam noted. Then her eyes fixed onto him, and she reached a hand out to him, trying to catch his attention.

_Like what?_

Tam bit back his gasp as he backed a step away. _She still can't be trusted,_ he told himself. "Not now." _Not now? When? What if it's now or never?_

 _When?_ she pressed.

Tam looked away. "When I know whether or not I can trust you." With that, he pulled a clump of shadows from his surroundings and covered himself with them, vanishing into the darkness.

Nameless Girl didn't bother him after that.

* * *

_The seventh day._

Before Tam knew it, one week had passed and it was the end of the week, the seventh day. Linh had been pestering him about his decision whether to trust Nameless Girl or not, and he knew he had to come to a decision by the end of today.

They had leaped to a glassy lake at the base of a snowcapped mountain to practise holding their breath underwater, and two small tents had been added so they could change into wetsuits. Swim caps covered their hair and enormous goggles covered their faces, and they waded into the chilly water to float facedown and try to stay there.

Tam had no problem with breathing underwater. He was more concerned about Linh. Ever since their first day in Exillium, Linh had doggedly avoided all lessons of underwater breathing, though sometimes she was forced to do it. She had long honed her ability until she had incredible control, but she still couldn't stay submerged in the water as it reminded her all too well of her life-changing incident in Atlantis.

Today was one of the unfortunate days which she was forced to put her head in the water, and Linh was having none of it like she always did. Tam accompanied her to the edge of the water, murmuring comforting words to her along the way, but it did little to help Linh. By the time they dipped their legs into the water, her whole body was shivering, and Tam doubted it was from the ice cold water.

"Come on, Linh," Tam shadow-whispered, "you have to do it. Just for ten seconds. Ten seconds, then the Coaches will let you off."

"I can't," she mumbled.

"You have to try," insisted Tam.

Linh raised her head to look at Tam, tears in her eyes. "You know I can't do it, Tam. Why do you keep forcing it on me? You know I would die if I did it. I would die."

Her words frightened Tam, and he squeezed her hand, trying not to shake her too vigorously. "Stop saying you'll die, Linh. You won't die. You're scaring me."

Linh remained silent.

"Come on," pleaded Tam. "Just for ten seconds."

Painful seconds slipped by before Linh heaved a sigh and flopped onto the surface of the water, facedown. Only two seconds had passed before she gasped, sputtering as she thrashed and flailed wildly in the water, sending water splashing into Tam's face.

"I can't," she mumbled. "I can't, I can't I can't."

"You can," said Tam. "Stop saying you can't."

"Can't."

The cycle repeated itself for an hour before Linh suddenly lapsed into silence. After a while, she sucked in a deep breath and floated facedown for the millionth time, except that she lasted _more than twenty seconds_ before she walked out of the water silently.

"Twenty-eight seconds," the purple Coach called out to her shaking figure. "A new record for you. Good job."

Tam stared in wonder after his twin sister. _How did she manage to do that?_

After he had finished his assignment, he waded out of the water as well and joined Linh on the bench, where several Waywards were drying themselves and taking deep breaths to reset the breathing patterns of their lungs.

After he had calmed down enough, he asked Linh, "How did you do that?"

Linh whispered into his ear, so soft that he had to strain his ears to make her voice out. "Nameless Girl Inflicted calm emotions on me so that I could keep my cool longer than possible."

"That's rubbish. Inflictors can only inflict negative emotions."

"I know, but she really did Inflict calm on me," Linh insisted. "I think you can trust her now, can't you?"

Tam remained silent, but he agreed with her. After Nameless Girl was out of the water— she was the last one and she broke the record with forty-six minutes— Tam shadow-whispered to her, "You want to know what we know?" _It's now or never,_ he told himself. _Now or never._

Nameless Girl responded immediately. _Of course._

Tam drew in a deep breath. "Okay." Then he forced himself to walk away from her before he could blurt out something on impulse. It could wait until after they were released.

After they'd gotten their beads and changed into their regular Exillium uniforms (Linh had gotten a bead for the first time during a underwater breathing lesson), he sidled over to Nameless Girl and whispered into her ear, "Now or never."

He turned to Linh, who held up their crystal to the setting sun, and turned back to Nameless Girl, holding out an offered hand to her.

She interlocked her fingers with his, and the light pulled the three of them away to an unknown future.


	15. memories of shadow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All these years, she’d been braving the cold, the heat, the storms, and now they were in the heart of the plague zone, trying not to feel as dead as the trees sprawled around them in a defeated heap. And now, there was the gleaming miracle she’d been hoping for, right in front of her very eyes.

 “Where are we?”

 Nameless Girl’s first words echoed all around the Wildwood Colony, tentative but persistent. Tam observed her discreetly as she made a slow circle around her surroundings, raising her head to look at the cloudless blue sky hanging above them, and lowering her head to stare at the speckled leaves and blackened, rotten fruit on the barren earth they were upon.

 “Introductions first,” Tam said, and at the nod of his head, both he and Linh threw back their hoods and ripped off their masks, revealing their black-and-silver hair and their palest of pale blue eyes. Linh felt a little self-conscious as she forced herself to look straight so that Nameless Girl could see her appearance clearly.

 Tam watched silently as Nameless Girl gawked at them, her eyebrows furrowed together in confusion like she was trying to come to a conclusion. And indeed, she did.

 “You’re brother and sister?” she finally asked, after a long and uncomfortable scrutinisation. Surprisingly, there wasn’t any hidden malice in her tone of voice, at least not yet— she hadn’t realised they were twins, anyway. Tam knew that after it dawned on her, she’d avoid them like the plague itself. 

 Linh merely nodded, not wanting to disclose the fact that they were the subject of the Lost Cities’ discrimination and mistreatment— Nameless Girl was so nice, and she didn’t want her to leave so soon— but Tam was straight to the point as he corrected Nameless Girl, “Twins— is that going to be a problem?”

 “Why would it—” Nameless Girl stopped herself before she could continue. 

 Strange, Tam mused as he stared at the masked girl like she was a puzzle she couldn’t figure out. And it infuriated him— he liked his world to make sense, he didn’t like his world to be riddled with questions he couldn’t find the answers to. 

 Why would it _ what? _ Why would it be a problem? Of course it would be a problem. It was  _ always _ a problem. 

 But all Nameless Girl said was, “Of course not. I know what it’s like to be different.” 

 Before Tam or Linh could process what she had said, she had thrown back her hood and pulled down her mask like they’d done a few seconds ago. 

 Linh was caught off guard by her rich, dark brown eyes with flecks of gold tucked away in the irises. Nameless Girl was pretty alright— her pale blonde hair cascading down to reach beyond her shoulders, her cheeks tinged with a slight flush from holding her breath underwater for too long, and paired off with full creamy pink lips, it made Linh really wish to know her name.

 Why did she have brown eyes? 

 It was a unwritten fact that every elf had blue eyes. Sure, there was a wide, wide variety of the different tones and shades of blue every elf’s eyes had, but there was no  _ brown. _

 Was that why she said she knew what it was like to be different? 

 Linh couldn’t imagine the gossip her eyes would cause. She had probably experienced similar problems to Tam and her. 

 But who was she, exactly? Could her brown eyes have anything to do with the fact she had four abilities? Why had she been banished? Why was she so eager to know more about the plague?

 So many questions, so little answers.

 Tam’s eyes flickered to Linh and back to Nameless Girl, before he introduced them, “I’m Tam, and this is Linh.”

 Their names rang out in the old, ruined forest. 

 No Tam Song. No Linh Song. 

 Just Tam and Linh. 

 Stripped of their last name, but stuck with each other so seamlessly. 

 Nameless Girl’s lips curled into a small smile. “I’m Sophie,” she told them, her eyes holding a sort of expectation in them.

 Linh frowned in confusion, and Tam remarked, “That’s a human name.” 

 Was she a human, then? But brown eyes aside, that wouldn’t make much sense. If she was a human, she wouldn’t have a special ability, much less  _ four _ special abilities.

 Sophie paused for a while, before nodding. “It is,” she agreed, a distant, wistful look in her eyes that Linh couldn’t decipher.

 A silence settled over them, before Sophie broke it by asking, “So where are we?” 

 Her voice echoed slightly around the empty grove,  _ we we we _ . 

 Linh bit her lip, but not so much that it would draw blood. She wasn’t a huge fan of blood. And she didn’t want to be reminded of her gory past, although sometimes it inevitably surfaced to her mind again in the form of flashbacks.

 “Home sweet home,” replied Tam with a tinge of bitterness in his voice as he swung his foot, kicking away a rotten, speckled fruit. 

 The sheer anger and violence in his movement sent chills down Linh’s spine.

  “It used to be beautiful,” she added, not recognising her soft voice as it resonated all around them. Sophie turned to look at her, and she met her gaze as she continued. “We used to feel so lucky to have found it. But that was before the gnomes fell ill.” 

 Her voice hitched at the last word, and she blinked back her tears quickly, not wanting her weakness to be scoured out.

 At the mention of the plague, Sophie stiffened. A little frantically, she climbed up onto a fallen trunk and stood on it with her two feet, trying to get a better view of the colony. 

 Linh silently mourned the fallen tree, but she knew no amount of mourning would resurrect it. 

 Grief swept over her, like a wave crashing back to shore. 

 “Was this the Wildwood Colony?” Sophie asked after a while, pulling Linh out of her brooding thoughts.

 Linh nodded in response, moving closer to a still-standing tree. The tree was already down with the plague, but it had a few days’ time before it would collapse like all the other trees around them. 

 They were fighting, Linh knew. Fighting to survive. Just like the gnomes. But would fighting really solve anything? They still fell in the end. 

 Just like Linh. 

 Taking a deep breath, she said, “They used to bring us dinner every night, and I loved falling asleep to their songs.” She brushed aside a blackened vine that had curled around the trunk of the tree as she whispered, “Do you know what’s happened to them?”  

 She could still remember her first day in Wildwood so pristinely, so clearly, it almost seemed like it was just yesterday. She wished it was just yesterday. But it had already been three full years and a little more, and now she was tired and weary and dehydrated of hope.

 “Only that they’re in quarantine—and that they’re all still alive,” Sophie reassured her. Linh’s squared shoulders relaxed as she heaved a sigh of relief, though it quickly disappeared when Sophie added, “But wait . . . you’re the teenagers who made the footprints they found?”

 Linh tensed. How did she know that they had been living here? What connections did she have to the outside world? Was she working with… the Council?

 “Who are  _ they?”  _  Tam demanded, making Sophie jerk and stumble a step away from him. Linh couldn’t blame Sophie— her brother could be intimidating when he wanted to be, and Tam, as expected, made a huge fuss over this.

 “The Council investigated after the colonists arrived at Lumenaria,” Sophie explained to him, looking a little more tensed than she’d originally been before Tam had snapped at her.  Linh relaxed. That wasn’t news to them, and the Council didn’t care about them anymore.

 “I wouldn’t call it an investigation.” Tam snorted, crossing his arms against his chest as he recalled what had happened a few weeks ago. “They didn’t seem to care. They were here for five whole minutes, scraped some bark and gathered a few leaves. They didn’t even ask us about the lights.” 

 He gestured to the grove in the distance, blackened by both the lack of light and the plague. “We’d been seeing white flashes for weeks before the plague hit. We tried to find what was causing them, but it was coming from somewhere across the ogres’ borders.”   
  
“You’ve seen ogres?” Sophie asked, a little incredulously, a little disbelievingly. Linh didn’t think she saw many ogres, or if she saw any at all. But living near the borders of what used to be the peaceful residential district of Serenvale, she and Tam were used to sighting the ogres marching in the land they now called Ravagog.   
  
“Not recently,” Tam clarified as he turned toward the dark mountains to the east, turning Sophie and Linh’s attention to the capital of the ogre cities. “But Ravagog is through that pass.”

 Sophie visibly shivered as she asked Tam, her voice a little terse, “Do you think the lights were connected to the plague?”  

 “You ask a lot of questions.” Tam made a slow circle around her as he stared at her accusingly from every angle like she was a problem he couldn’t work out. And honestly, Linh thought Sophie was mysterious too. 

 But maybe a lot of things had changed since she and Tam had left the Lost Cities, and maybe they had become forgotten antiques hidden away in a dark, dusty corner of the room.

 “I thought you brought me here to tell me everything you know,” she countered him, a challenging expression glowing in her eyes. Linh had to admit, she was doing better than she had expected her to. Not a lot of people could argue with Tam like that. Even her mother couldn’t.

 Her mother… 

 “I don’t remember promising  _ everything _ ,” he retorted, tossing his bangs out of his eyes and staring at Sophie with a defiant look in his eyes. Staring into his eyes was like looking at fire burn its way through ice.

 Before the debate could go on any further, Linh shook herself out of her thoughts and piped in with her opinion, “She’s trying to help the gnomes.” Linh placed a comforting hand on his arm as she reminded him of why they had called her here. “Just like she helped me today”— she turned around to look at Sophie, giving her a half-grateful, half-sheepish smile— “You must think me so foolish, by the way— a Hydrokinetic afraid of drowning.”

 “Hey, having an ability doesn’t mean everything’s suddenly easy.” Sophie returned her smile, a reassuring one this time. Linh looked down at her Exillium boots, heat creeping up her cheeks.  _ Finally someone who understands. _

 “Said the girl with  _ four  _ abilities.” Tam leaned closer, squinting at the pin they couldn’t recognise at all— the one with a starry sky background and a flying alicorn. “So the big question is—what did you do to get banished?”

 “Most of the Councillors wanted me gone the moment they knew I existed,” Sophie replied carelessly, like it was no big deal that  _ the Council was trying to get rid of the very mention of her existence.  _ That only served to make Linh even more intrigued. Why was this girl’s existence considered dangerous by the Council? “I just finally gave them a good enough reason. What about you guys?”

 Linh almost asked her to clarify what that “good enough reason” had been.

 Tam started to shake his head— his first reaction was always to push invasive questions away as he wanted to protect Linh, but Linh put her hand on his shoulder. Tam looked up to lock gazes with her, and Linh tried to tell him,  _ It’s okay. Sometimes you just have to confide in somebody. Sometimes you have to let it out. _

 Tam looked away, and Linh knew he was still wary and unsure, but at least he had given her his consent.

 Linh inhaled, feeling the dry air swirl in her lungs, a vain attempt to prepare herself for the truth she was going to let out of her heart. 

 “She can know the truth, Tam. It was my fault.”  _ My fault, my fault, my fault.  _

 She raised her hands and mist swarmed around them, glinting with a million rainbows. 

 They were beautiful like how rainbows always were, but they were merely a perfect illusion. 

 Nothing she created with her cursed ability was ever truly beautiful. 

 “Water pleads for my attention. But too often it’s a trick.”  _ Too often it’s a trick, trick, trick. _

 Tears stung her eyes. With the sudden emotional outburst, she momentarily lost control of her ability. 

 The mist thickened into a storm that soaked them with a heavy downpour, mixing her tears with rainwater. 

 Linh was glad Sophie was entranced by the storm and not focused on her teary face.

 “I became the Girl Of Many Floods,” she whispered, feeling the raindrops hammer down on her shoulders and seep into the fabric of her Exillium uniform. Felt it turn her hair into a soggy mess. Felt it cling to her skin like magnets. Never letting go. “And after too many mistakes, my parents had no choice but to let them banish me.”

 She was never meant to become the heir of Choralmere. 

 She was cursed with the ability. 

 That was all a mistake. 

_  She  _ was a mistake. 

_ And mistakes always have to be corrected. _

 “They had a choice,” Tam spat.

 They had a choice, alright. 

 But who would want a mistake to cling on to them like how water clung on to her?

 She took a deep breath and whispered, “You’ll have to excuse my brother. He carries more bitterness than I do. But he doesn’t have to be here—”

 “Yes,” Tam interrupted her, “I do.”

 Linh raised her teary eyes to look at her twin brother. Never had he looked so vulnerable before. Through the pouring rain, sadness tinged her smile.

 Rain fell because clouds could no longer handle the weight. Tears fell because the heart could no longer handle the pain.

 “No one sentenced my brother to Exillium,” she told Sophie, who looked a little awkward, like she was watching something too personal for her taste. “He chose to stay with me.”

 “I didn’t want her to face this alone,” Tam mumbled, with the same soft look in his eyes. “And I wouldn’t stay with my family anyway. They’d always wished they didn’t have the shame of  _ twins. _ I wasn’t going to let them pass me off as an only child.”

 Linh flinched, memories of all the unfair treatment they had been given just because they were born in the same womb at the same time, and the look of shame on their parents’ faces whenever snide comments about her and Tam were passed on to them. The moment when Mai had told her that she was going to take the Entrance Examinations without Tam, and the look Mai had given her when everything had went crashing down in the underwater city.

 “How long ago was that?” Sophie asked them, her face filled with sadness and empathy.

 Subconsciously, Linh’s hand came to rest on her heavy Exillium necklace. “Twelve hundred and fourteen days.” 

_  And counting. Still counting. Always counting, _

_  They keep saying that it’d stop one day, but when it finally stops, would it really feel like it’s stopped? Or is there no end to this living nightmare? _

 “That’s a long time to be banished,” Sophie commented, her eyes widening in awe. But it wasn’t something to be awed of.

 Linh nodded wordlessly. It was indeed a long time, and time had made them weary and tired. Waiting stretched into more waiting, and after even more waiting it didn’t feel like waiting anymore.

 Pulling the water from their clothes and hair with a sweep of her arm, she told Sophie, “We should get out of sight. There have been many visitors to the Colony since the gnomes left.”

 Sophie froze. “Were any of them wearing black cloaks?” she asked, her voice trembling a little. Linh frowned at her strange question, and inside, she was wondering,  _ How did she know there  _ had  _ been visitors wearing black cloaks? _

 “Three were, yes,” she agreed. “They came a week ago and checked the roots.” Why the roots, she didn’t know. Maybe the roots were important. Living in a world that she didn’t belong to any longer, she didn’t have the right to know.

 Like she had just been struck by lightning, Sophie ran to the abandoned grove and dropped to her knees in front of the largest tree. Curled red roots jutted out of the ground all around her. 

 Tam and Linh exchanged a confused glance with each other, before walking toward her. Sophie looked up as they approached. Her eyes were filled with worry, and she fumbled around as she stood up shakily from the speckled grass.

 “Did you hear the Neverseen say anything?” she asked Tam and Linh. Her voice sounded like it was jittering ever so slightly, and she was subconsciously fidgeting with her hands, a sure sign of fear. 

 “The Neverseen?” Tam repeated, sounding just as confused as Linh felt. The word was completely foreign to her, though there was an ominous ring to it, like it was something that she ought to be scared about.

 Sophie turned to face Tam, clasping her hands together so they wouldn’t shake as much. “Remember when you asked me about monsters? They’re who I was imagining. If you ever see them again—  _ hide _ . They’re involved with this plague somehow. The ogres are too. We just haven’t been able to prove it.” 

 Her words came out hurriedly and quickly, like she was running out of time, or she was emphasising the danger of this Neverseen. The truth was, Linh wasn’t processing much of her words. All she understood was that these people were possibly behind the plague, and they were conspiring with the ogres.

 “Who’s  _ ‘we’ _ ?” Tam asked.

 “Me. My friends. And . . . others.” Sophie seemed to realise she wasn’t making much sense to Tam and Linh, because she shook her head and took a deep breath before she tried to explain her dilemma in a better way. “Let’s just say that I know people who are good at uncovering secrets. And when you’re facing a group like the Neverseen, you need lots of backup.”

 Why was she telling them that? Weren’t they detached from the outside world? Well, they  _ were, _ until Sophie came into their life. And even though Linh couldn’t understand half of what she was trying to tell them, she knew that it was severely important, and this would change everything she’d ever known… for the millionth time in her life.

 But maybe, this was the biggest change she would ever experience.

 The sudden sound of branches crunching rang through the silent air, making the three of them jump. But when Linh turned back, she saw nothing suspicious. It was only the wind creaking through the sickly trees. 

 But why was there this sickly feeling that she always had when something, or someone was watching them?

 It was probably nothing.

 “This way,” Linh broke the uncomfortable silence as she led them up the crest of the hill, where the span of the narrow valley stretched out beyond them. The river cut down the center before it disappeared into the jagged gray mountains, and the enormous iron gate Linh was tired of always seeing barred the pass beyond the foothills.

 “Ravagog,” Sophie whispered, making Linh jump a little. She turned to look at the girl they’d just met all over again. There was a distant look to her eyes, and she was shuffling her feet slightly, like she wanted to get closer to the ogre capital. Linh knew, because it also gave her the same sort of feeling. What would it be like to escape to a city where no one knew who they were?

 “Sometimes, at night, we can hear them marching,” Linh told her, shielding her eyes from the glare of the rays of the setting sun.

 “Are you sure it’s safe to stay here?” Sophie asked dubiously.

 “We’re banished,” Tam simply said. “Nowhere is safe.”

 And it was true.

 They’d reached the river by then, and Linh knew it was her time to really display her ability when it was in her control, not like the dramatic and emotion-swept storm she’d rained down on them indulgently just now. 

 She closed her eyes for a second, then opened her eyes, feeling mustered concentration sweep and gather into her mind. Using the same concentration, she raised her hand, flicked her wrist, lifting the water out from the riverbed. 

 The river made a sweeping arc over their heads, leaving dry ground for them to cross underneath. As soon as they reached the other side of the shore, the water crashed down and surged away with the same strong current Linh was used to.

 Well, at least that was one thing she could manage perfectly. Control made Linh feel especially good about herself.

 “Wow,” Sophie breathed, seemingly amazed by Linh’s show of Hydrokinesis. The single word carried so much awe, so much admiration, that Linh couldn’t help it but blush madly at the appraisal. Tam had a proud look on his face as he looked at Linh warmly. In that short moment, Linh felt immensely loved. 

 Tam headed for the thicket of gnarled trees in which they had made their temporary residence after their treehouse had proved itself impossible to stay in any longer. Linh wasn’t sure when it would fall to the plague too, but she hoped it lasted as long as possible. 

 She watched silently as Tam used his ability to wave a clump of shadows away, revealing a gap hidden in the branches.

 After Linh stepped in, Sophie followed her through, staring at the place in which they were staying. As expected, she didn’t look the least impressed, and her eyes were tinged with sympathy. 

 Tam hated people taking their pity on them, but Linh was okay with it— who wouldn’t be pitiful, seeing the miserable state they were in, compared with the extravagant and luxurious lifestyle elves were used to living?

 “This is really where you guys live?” Sophie asked, a hint of disbelief and incredulity hidden in her voice. 

 “We don’t need much.” Despite Linh’s indifference toward Sophie’s sympathy, she still felt a little defensive about their living condition. 

 They had to take what they were given, and they weren’t given much at all.

 Right then, Sophie looked a little thoughtful— like she was forming an idea inside her mind, but as Linh realised they hadn’t gotten to the main point of Sophie’s visit, she was too distracted to try and figure out what she was thinking about. 

 Instead, she whirled on Tam, asking, “How long are you going to wait before you tell her the rest?” 

 Tam shot her a look, but she ignored it. 

_ Some things cannot be avoided, dear brother. The past hurts me as much as it does for you, but our parents are far, far away now. They cannot hurt us here. This girl can be trusted…  _

 “Tell me the rest of what?” Sophie asked, her curiosity piqued, like Linh knew it would. This girl had a strong thirst for knowledge, but whatever her purpose was, Linh thought she was trustable enough. But obviously, Tam wasn’t going to be convinced that easily. And Linh knew instantly what was coming next.

 Tam shook his head— nothing new— as he protested, “We still don’t know her well enough.”

 Linh saw an exasperated expression cross Sophie’s eyes. “Okay, so what do you need to know?” she inquired, a little stiffly. “Ask and I’ll answer.”

 Tam wasn’t moved at all. Instead, in an attempt to set an intimidating look, he swept aside his bangs to uncover his eyes and gave her the full intensity of The Stare. 

 “Answers can be lies,” he said, darkness clouding his voice. “If you really want me to trust you, I’ll need to read your shadowvapour.”

 There it was. The infamous shadow-reading that was often compared to with the Descrying ability of Councillor Terik. It was just as effective, but people often opted to go with Descrying sessions instead, due to the fact that it was ten times scarier.

 “It doesn’t hurt,” Linh promised. “He just has to let his shadow pass through your mind.”

 “That . . . might be a problem.” 

 There was a hesitance, maybe even an underlying sheepishness, to Sophie’s voice. She wrung her hands together as she proceeded to explain, “It’s hard to explain without getting into a bunch of crazy stuff about my genetics. But my mind is impenetrable. Even Councillor Terik couldn’t descry me.”

 “Shadowvapour is simpler to sense than potential,” Linh assured her, even as she was stunned by Sophie’s claim. 

 Who  _ was _ this girl?

 “Since when were _you_ the expert on my ability?” Tam asked her, giving her a look that seemed to say, _Don’t bite off more than you can chew_. He could’ve used shadow-whispering to secretly communicate with her, but both of them knew Sophie would be able to tell immediately, given that she was a Telepath— she was probably used to secret conversations behind the scenes—   _and_ she knew that Tam could shadow-whisper.

 “Same reason I know you’re stalling,” Linh told him, flashing him a defiant stare as she tilted her head to the side. 

 Her eyes held a challenge as she continued, “I’ve lived with you for almost fifteen years”—  _ even though I was separated from you for the first two years of my life, it feels like I’ve known you all my life—  _ “and this is why we brought her here. Do the reading and we’ll tell her.”

_ This is our first connection to the outside world. _

__ Tam sighed, and turned away from her, muttering something under his breath. But that meant that he had relented and he was going to do the shadow reading, and he was going to tell Sophie the information she so wanted and held valuable.

 Linh turned to Sophie, trying to mask the triumphant expression on her face. “Assuming you don’t mind, of course,” she said.

 Sophie shook her head in response, indicating that she didn’t mind. “You can try the reading,” she told the grudging Shade, who looked as if he wanted to opt out. “But you have to promise you’ll tell me even if you can’t understand what you see in my head.”

 “Deal,” Linh said quickly, ignoring the glare Tam shot her. 

 Thankfully, he moved toward Sophie without saying a second word, preparing to start the shadow reading. 

 Sophie flinched away from his ever-shifting shadow, but he reassured her that it would be okay, before plunging his shadow into her mind. 

 Watching by the sidelines, Linh felt a little disconcerted. It looked like an evil spirit trying to possess the blonde-haired girl. But Sophie stayed absolutely still save for a small shiver, and before Linh knew it, the shadow reading was over, and Tam’s shadow was back by his side, where it belonged.

 “I can see why Terik struggled with his descrying,” he muttered under his breath, but loud enough for Sophie and Linh to hear. “You have a  _ lot _ of shadowvapour. But you also have a lot of illumination, and they cancel each other out.”

_ She has both yin and yang inside her.  _

_  Just like me. _

 Shakily, Linh pressed her clasped hands to her mouth, forcing herself to breathe slowly.

 “Is that a good thing?” Sophie asked, ever the oblivious person.

 “Balance is good,” Linh agreed, proud when her voice didn’t shake at all.  _ I have both the power to create, and the power to  _ destroy.

 “But it can be hard to hold on to,” Tam countered. Linh could tell he was implying about her past, and she inwardly winced.

 “Which only matters for her future,” she insisted, even though she knew Tam was right. But since Sophie seemed to be on the right side for now, her darkness wouldn’t tip over her illumination. And with her powerful abilities, it would only be right for her to stand on the right side.

_ Everyone says that balance is good, but in truth, balance is so hard to hold on to.  _

 Suddenly, as Tam turned to Sophie to share what valuable information they had, Linh heard a distant, disembodied voice ringing in her ears, seeming to belong to everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

_ There’s no  _ balance  _ when it comes to the bad guys, Keefe. They’re bad. It’s that simple. _

* * *

 

   “What do think about her?” Tam asked Linh, when Sophie had finally leaped away from Wildwood. He was sitting by the riverbank, watching Linh spiral the water into thin, streamer-like tendrils.

 “She has a name, you know. Sophie.” Linh waved her arms, guiding the tendrils to rain down gently and precisely onto the still-living shrubbery around them. They shuddered for a split second, like they had been through and through with a horrible drought and it was their first taste of water. “I think she’s unlike anything I’ve ever come across.”

 “You speak of her like she’s not one of us.”

 “Well, to be fair, she has brown eyes. But I do think that she’s more similar to us than you think she is. And believe me, I know what you think half the— no,  _ all  _ the time.”

 Tam’s stony face broke into a rare smile, a thriving tree in the midst of a wasteland. Like a blossom on a Panakes tree. “You might as well be a Telepath, you know. I guess that just comes with knowing each other well. But you’re a tad more complicated.”

 Linh shook her head, amused. “We’re twins.”

 “Yes, we are, but we’re like yin and yang when it comes to our character.” Tam turned away from her. “And we see this  _ Sophie _ in different perspectives. I still don’t think we should trust her completely. I mean, yes, she’s good, but she can easily turn her back against us. She has as much darkness as she had illumination.”

 Linh was silent for a moment. Then she spoke, more quiet than usual. “Yes, but that’s the same case with me, isn’t it?”

 Tam tensed for a moment— it could’ve just been a figment of Linh’s overactive imagination, but she was too convinced that it wasn’t to see otherwise. “You mean about Terik descrying you when we were six?”

 “Tam, don’t lie that you haven’t performed a shadow reading on me before.”

 “What—”

 “First of all, you couldn’t have not done that. Not with your extra-keen sense of observation and your wariness. Not to mention your trust issues, which only grew more serious when we left the Lost Cities. So, you did a shadow reading on me. Which, you didn’t tell me about. Which I didn’t sense, too. Didn’t you?”

 Tam stared at her, but his expression was unreadable. “How did you end up with that conclusion?”

 “Mother— I  _ mean, _ Mai— must’ve done the same too. Honestly,  _ she _ would, maybe… some time after Quan returned to the Lost Cities? Quan probably wanted to know the differences between us, the difference between twins that are so very alike, and he wanted to know which one of the two of us was the better one. And Mai must’ve seen the darkness in me. That’s probably why she threw me aside. And after you manifested as a Shade and you learnt that people can hide darkness inside them as easily as you can scour their darkness out, you must’ve performed a reading on me too. And you got the same result as hers. And yet… you decided to stand by me even as  _ she _ decided I was worthless.”

 Linh realised she’d been rambling incessantly, and stopped abruptly, looking up at Tam. He still had that indecipherable look on his face, and she hated it. Why did he seem so far away, so out of touch with her? Was it because he was thinking back into the ruined past of theirs?

 Everything about their past was horrible— except for him. Their past was like a stormy sea, tossing the two of them around relentlessly, but at least they had each other— they were each other’s anchors, holding on to each other and never letting go.

 “Aren’t I right?” she asked quietly, softer than the gentle lull of the waves of the ocean.

 Tam sighed, and nodded reluctantly. “What is your point, bringing this up so suddenly?”

 “My  _ point _ is,” Linh said, feeling a relentless breeze encircle them, riffling the strands of their jet-black hair and tugging at their heavy, sweaty Exillium vests. “You said that Sophie had both illumination and darkness inside of her, and that they cancel each other out— just like me. And when you found out that about me, you didn’t choose to shun me. Instead you decided to trust me and draw closer to me. And look at us now. We’re bonded so closely we can’t get any better. We make each other’s lives worth it. So why can’t you trust Sophie as well? She’s the change we’ve been looking for.”

 “I appreciate all of this you’re saying about me, but you don’t seem to understand that I don’t even  _ know  _ Sophie. She’s not connected to me at all— ”

 “True,” Linh cut in. “But you’re thinking too narrowly. She doesn’t have the same bloodlines as we do. But—- you know? You know?”

 “What? What do I know?”

 Linh stared at him exasperatedly, waving her arms in an exaggerated motion. “You know. She could be your  _ friend?” _

 Tam stiffened immediately at the mention of friendship, and Linh knew why.

 The two of them hadn’t had any friends in their entire life before. The only time Tam had come into closer contact with this distant, faraway thing was the sparse lunchtimes he’d shared with Keefe Sencen.

 And Keefe hadn’t approached him at all, not even right before they left for the Neutral Territories.

 Linh sighed, looking down at her feet. “I’m sorry, Tam.”

 “That time.”

 She looked up, startled. “What?”

 “That time in Exillium… she asked to be my friend.”

 Linh gaped at him for a second, before she broke into a smile. “See? That was before you revealed you knew  _ something _ about the plague, wasn’t it? That just means she genuinely wants to know you better. You’re overthinking it.”

 “I’ll see if I’m overthinking it myself. She probably wouldn’t come to visit us again. I’m sure of it.”

* * *

The following day, contrary to Tam’s belief, Sophie came to visit again.

Except this time, she came with a lot of company.

Tam saw them first.

“Who are those people?” he whispered frantically, nudging Linh. 

Linh shrugged, but Tam could see she the considerable stiffening of her movements as she angled her body away from the incoming group of people. Tam shielded his eyes from the glaring sunlight— light was never too kind to him—  trying to make out the silhouettes. 

Then he stiffened too as he had seen… 

_ Sophie _ .

“I  _ told _ you that she wasn’t to be trusted,” he muttered, feeling his whole body shake with anger and betrayal. “Quick, before they advance on us.”

“But—” Linh tried to protest. Tam pushed her roughly, causing her to stumble backwards and crash into the thorn bush behind her. Linh felt a million needles pierce into her back, but she didn’t cry out. She was used to pain, anyway, and she could mask it as well as she could put on her Exillium mask.

Tam spun a flurry of shadows and flung them towards Linh’s trembling figure, effectively obscuring her from sight, and obscuring  _ her _ sight as well. A suffocated feeling started to overwhelm her, because  _ Mai had hid behind shadows that fateful night—  plagued Wildwood with shadows— used shadows to eavesdrop on her—  _

She forced herself to  _ breathe _ , sucking in breath like a vacuum. After what seemed like an eternity of being shrouded in suffocating shadow, light finally crept into her vision and she could move her limbs again. Acting like nothing had happened, she stepped out of her hiding place to face Sophie and her friends— and… a man, a man with wrinkled skin and a plump figure.  _ This guy can’t be an elf. _

But then again, Sophie was an elf and she had brown eyes. 

“Wow, that’s like an antivanish,” a pretty coffee-brown haired girl said. Her eyes were impossibly teal as she stared at the twins. “How did you do that?”

Linh smiled shyly, hiding her head in embarrassment… And when she looked up again, she froze, her breath catching in her throat.

Beside Sophie stood a startlingly boy with blonde hair and ice blue eyes.

_ Could it be… ? _

Memories she didn’t know still existed in her mind rushed back like a wave crashing back to shore. Of the short-lived time she and Tam had spent in Foxfire. Of the  _ people _ they’d met back there.

_ But why is he banished? Why has he reappeared in our lives again? _

_ No, no, it can’t be. Can it? _

She turned away to look at Tam, wondering if he saw what she had.

Tam wouldn’t meet her gaze, his eyes solely trained on the boy.

“We can trade ability secrets another time,” the mysterious man interrupted. His bulk was intimidating, and Linh instinctively found herself shying away. “At the moment, I have a proposition for the Song twins. Shall we?” He pointed to the river dividing them. Tam and Linh exchanged a glance before Tam reluctantly nodded.

Without further ado, Linh swept her arm and raised the water into an arch before taking Tam in the hand and guiding him across the river.

As they reached the other side of the river, Linh got a closer look at Sophie and her companions. They were even more surreal up close— Linh hadn’t seen so many unmasked faces in more than three years. The faces looked fresh, fresher than Tam’s bitter complexion and hers— she couldn’t help but flick a curious glance at the river, to study her reflection.

She didn’t look like the beautiful, broken Linh that always appeared in her wardrobe mirror. 

“So, who are you guys?” Tam asked, a tone of suspicion embedded in his voice as he stared at the man in a disguise. Linh could sense the immense distrust coursing through him, as if she was an Empath, and she couldn’t blame him. 

People who hid behind lies were always the untrustworthy ones.

“This is Mr. Forkle,” Sophie introduced. “He . . . takes a little getting used to. And these are my friends, Dex, Keefe, Fitz, and Biana.”

Linh avoided their eyes as she bowed deeply and murmured a quick hello. But inside her mind was racing at lightspeed, shock powering her every thought.  _ Keefe! Keefe Sencen! _ It  _ was _ him. And Tam obviously recognised him as well, no doubt from that. 

But why did it seem that he didn’t remember them? Or was he that good of an actor?

“I really love your hair,” Biana told her, admiring the long strands with the silver tips. Linh, thankful for the distraction, brushed them against her palms absentmindedly.

“Mine is less of a protest than my brother’s,” Linh replied, smiling uncertainly at Tam, who was starting to look rather uncomfortable with the topic of conversation. “I melted my pendant to remind myself what happens when I lose control.”

“Enough about our hair,” Tam said, a little irritatingly. “Why are you here?”

Sophie stepped forward. “Mr. Forkle wants to offer you a proper place in which you can stay, with a roof over your heads and comfortable beds you can rest in. He has arranged you a former dwarf’s residence. Is that fine with you?”

Linh’s eyes widened ever so slightly, and her breath caught in her throat. All thoughts of Keefe and her hair vanished from her head. 

A proper residence. That was everything she could’ve asked for, and much more. All these years, she’d been braving the cold, the heat, the storms, and now they were in the heart of the plague zone, trying not to feel as dead as the trees sprawled around them in a defeated heap. And now, there was the gleaming miracle she’d been hoping for, right in front of her very eyes.

But… she knew Tam wouldn’t agree to it that easily, and as she expected, the first thing that popped out of his mouth was, “What’s the catch?”

Mr. Forkle’s lips twisted with an idea of an amused smile. “There is none. King Enki and I have everything arranged. All he asks is that you respect his laws while you live there—which are really no different than elvin laws, except perhaps slightly less restrictive.”

Linh watched as Tam’s stone facade crumbled. He blinked his eyes, like he was trying to blink back the tears from his eyes. Linh couldn’t remember when was the last time he’d even cried like this. He’d always cried— but not like this. The only reason why they cried was because they were lonely, helpless, stranded. And now they were crying because someone finally cared enough to help. 

“Why are you helping us?” Tam managed in a steady voice.

“Because someone should.” Mr. Forkle stepped closer, his wrinkled features softening. “I make a point of trying to right the wrongs I see in my world.”

Linh felt the tears threatening to fall out, and she wiped her eyes quickly. “This is far more than we ever could’ve expected,” she said in a trembling voice.

“It still seems like there has to be a catch,” Tam mumbled.

“There isn’t,” Sophie promised, in her soft voice.

“Please,” Linh whispered to Tam, a single word of plead hanging in the air like an unanswered question. “I can’t stay here any longer.”

Her eyes flickered to the fallen trees in the distance, all drooping their heads in silent melancholy, and she felt the tears rushing out again. 

Tam sighed at the sight of her crying. “I guess we could give it a try,” he said quietly.

“A wise decision,” Mr. Forkle told him, seemingly unaffected by the show of emotion. Sophie didn’t look surprised as well— but that was because she’d already seen Tam and Linh cry. Linh felt that all the tears she’d shed could fill up the entire Wildwood river. “If the arrangement doesn’t suit you, we can find another. Do you need assistance packing up your tents?”

Linh shook her head, drying her tears and taking a deep breath to calm herself down. “We always keep everything gathered in case we have to flee,” she managed to say. “Give me five minutes.” With that she took off to the other side of the river again, racing towards their little makeshift house. As she ran, the wind ravaged against her face, taking her tears away.

She reached the clearing, and quickly rolled their blankets up, tying them securely with twine she’d collected from what was left of the woods. Then she dredged up the tents from the ground and separated the poles from the tarpaulin. Sweeping all the things from the ground into two bags she’d crafted out of the large, fan-like leaves she’d picked from the border of the colony, she carried them across the river to meet the waiting group. 

After discussing for a while, Linh closed her eyes, mustering all the concentration she had in her. She felt the power of her ability run through her like the current of the river in front of her, bubbling and pulsing until it reached boiling point. Then she opened her eyes, and raised her hands to the sky. Clouds as dark as Mai Song’s shadows blotted out any light from the sky, and gusty wind stirred up, rustling the leaves of the trees and messing up the strands of their hair.

Then the storm came. The others gasped and held on for dear life, but Linh stood rooted to the ground, hands still up against the sky as she felt the raindrops hammer into her face and her shoulders. She felt her control trying to slip away, but she held on firmly like an anchor plunged into the ground, focusing on her two feet, holding strong in the scene of chaos.

She would not let herself make mistakes ever again, she told herself fiercely as she curled her hands into tight fists and  _ pulled. _

In a blink of an eye, the storm was wiped out. Linh felt a pull in her gut like she was plummeting from high up above. The sky cleared and the ground was as dry as before it had rained.

Linh lowered her head from the sky, her smile bittersweet. Yet another part of her life had been washed away by the storm that was fate, leaving nothing but unanswered questions in its wake.


End file.
